Birthday Presents

[Floey]

AIBU? For the 10th year running I have sent a friend's DD a birthday present. For the 10th year running she has not acknowledged it, let alone sent any form of thank you. Add to that, in recent years the same has happened with a younger sibling. Is it time to stop sending presents?

[Crispsheets]

Have you asked if they've received it???
I'd have stopped after the first year if no acknowledgement. Does she reciprocate?

[RoughMagic]

Yes.

[Floey]

Hi Crispsheets, I do always ask and get 'oh yes, it arrived ok' and no, she does not reciprocate. One year she even asked to check if my DS had read a particular book so I got a bit excited thinking she would send something, but then she didn't send it anyway! Never even sends a birthday card

[Uhohheregoes]

Why are you continuing to send gifts? Stop it.

[Cocochoco]

Yes ditto. She doesn't want to do gifts so why are you bothering?

[Crunchymum]

Sorry OP but you need to stop sending gifts.

Not only is your friend rude and ungrateful but the fact she doesn't even reciprocate by sending a card is beyond cheeky.

I don't 'give to receive' but this is insane!

[myownprivateidaho]

You're sending gifts to the child not the friend. Yes the friend is rude, but I don't see why that should affect your treatment of the child.

[5Foot5]

She probably wants you to stop. She doesn't want to get involved in a present exchange situation but rather than explicitly saying so and therefore seeming mean she is hoping you will just take the hint.

[SirKillalot]

Why are you still sending gifts? Stop.

[Floey]

I didn't think of that. Good point

[HeCantBeSerious]

4 years ago we used to buy for all of the children in the family. We got no thank you or reciprocal gifts for 3 years so we don't buy for any of them now.

[Planty18]

I agree with 5foot5, she may simply not want to/can't afford to do gifts. Very awkward thing to discuss and she has probably assumed you would have stopped by now. Not acknowledging your kindness or thanking you is still very rude but I would have stopped after the second one without reciprocation - not because you give to receive but because I have stretched myself plenty of times to reciprocate when we really couldn't afford it so would consider that.