I will try to keep this as brief as possible. I was adopted as a baby and found my birth mum when I was 17, my adoptive parents were a bit odd throughout my childhood (to say the least) and went batshit. We tried to keep the relationship going but it didn't work and we haven't spoken for a few years now, I think both sides are ok with this.
I'm now in my early thirties, my birth mum has three other daughters, all of whom live with her and are between the ages of 10-25, she was actually pregnant with the eldest before my adoption was final. I've got 3 children of my own, she never sends any of us birthday cards, never calls and very rarely messages through Facebook. I had a baby 5 months ago and other than a message the day of her birth have heard nothing, I've messaged a few times but had no reply. She's a good mum to her other daughters but not to me, at all. She makes no effort and is not there for me either as a mum or a friend. I live very far away and am in her 'area' once a year. Meeting up is always an issue, she's busy, she'll arrange for us to go there then be out or have friends over or need to go shopping. This year I messaged her months and months ago giving notice of when we would be there and she finally replied today to say she's busy for the 2 weeks we will be over, lots going on, has booked a holiday, will try to squeeze a day in to see us.
I'm devastated and fed up. Have no extended family and feel alone and a bit pathetic. I'm also sleep deprived and exclusively breast feeding the baby so accept I may be acting a little self indulgent and pathetic.
I suppose I'm just gutted that I will never have decent relationships with my sisters, have a mother who will not give me any of her time or energy and upset for my children who have almost no grandparents.
I think it's time to send a reply along the lines of saying enough is enough and that if she can't treat me in a better way we will have to leave the relationship. What do you think?
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AIBU?
To say enough is enough with birth mum
34 replies
SarahJane333 · 15/07/2016 16:43
OP posts:
Arfarfanarf ·
15/07/2016 17:29
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