This will probably out me to a couple or two people here but what the hell. I am fuming right now and came for some sane words. Sorry for the long story.
So me and DH are from not so well off families and have worked really really hard over the last few years. On top of that, DH has been helping (before our marriage and after that too) his extended family whenever he could, bring up the excuse of having been there himself once. This runs into a minimum of 15-20k and could possibly be more. His father does not work though his wife does some part time and we pay part of their rent (we don't own any property anywhere and rent ourselves since we are together). DH is also awful with money and I am the one who keeps the heck now and he totally agrees I should. So no problems there.
Now it has come to the point that the said relatives have actually been under the impression that we will be paying towards the tutoring of a few kids (even the fecking number keeps increasing). If it was for even a loan, I could probably consider but it's asked as a bloody HANDOUT!! We have two DCs ourselves. FIL caused a havoc some years ago which meant DH had to bail him out and we are still paying for that and will pay for three more years. We are trying our best to get on the property ladder right now. No holidays, no paid outings for DCs. Clothes and food absolutely basic. We have no chance of inheritance from anyone ever.
But one phone call and DH becomes convinced others need the savings more than us. I am sick and tired of this. I am not working right and I have contributed towards helping the relatives but I am so over it now. AIBU? Should I be more thoughtful? I am planning to cut the contact right down to one phone call per few months now to any of them. and absolutely no handouts!
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About this family drama...
60 replies
Valentine2 · 28/01/2016 20:01
OP posts:
zzzzz ·
28/01/2016 20:34
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
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