What is it like being a single parent with three very young children?

(48 Posts)
spad Wed 27-Jan-16 21:21:49

Just that. At a crossroads.

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:25:45

Hideous. I wish I could be more encouraging. If you have support you may be able to find it more manageable though!

jukeboxdive Wed 27-Jan-16 21:26:30

I did it with two, both under four, yes I think probably that two would have been substantially easier than three, but it really was ok. It was better than ok - compared to being in an unhappy marriage it was bloody brilliant! We just got into our routines and were a happy little team. Very hard to give up when I ultimately met someone new.

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Wed 27-Jan-16 21:28:29

I am a single parent of 5.

It is hard work, and tiring, but it is also fun and much better than being in a shitty marriage.

Once we got our routine in place we have been ticking over nicely.

operaha Wed 27-Jan-16 21:28:53

10, 8 and 2 here. Tough. But so worth not being in a shit relationship for. Ten years on, so much more worth it. You'll be fine if it's what you really want and need

megletthesecond Wed 27-Jan-16 21:31:25

Probably fine if you don't have to work or have flexible work. I've been a lp for 7 yrs and just about manage to work pt I rarely tidy and shout a lot.

Hippywannabe Wed 27-Jan-16 21:31:59

Hell on earth at times. Got left when they were 1,3,4, now they are all grown and gone, I'd do it all again in a heartbeat.

spad Wed 27-Jan-16 21:34:00

Is it possible to meet a new partner if you are a single mum with three kids?

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:34:50

Blimey.

MiniCooperLover Wed 27-Jan-16 21:36:51

Is that your biggest concern? confused

spad Wed 27-Jan-16 21:37:12

Why Blimey? I was single for a hundred years before I met my husband. I like being married. I don't like being unhappily married.

I like having a best friend. Will I never get that again?

cannotlogin Wed 27-Jan-16 21:38:09

you haven't left yet! think about why you want to leave - can anything be done to salvage the relationship? If you have to leave, that is your focus, not on possible potential partners in the future. Anything is possible!

I was left with one on the way, a 2 year old and a 4 year old and we have always coped fine. I lowered my housework standards and I have highly developed routines and expectations of who does what and when so that we get out of the house at 7:30 am the minimum of fuss.

Patheticfallacy Wed 27-Jan-16 21:38:11

Yes. He's here beside me with man flugrin

spad Wed 27-Jan-16 21:38:11

I feel very lonely and would love to think that someone would again enjoy my company.

It does concern me. I like being happy.

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:39:19

Well, my honest response is that I think you need to focus on you for a bit. It's one thing happening to meet someone along the way, although with children as young as yours it may not be easy, but I think that way misery lies if you want to replace one husband with another.

Owllady Wed 27-Jan-16 21:41:03

I'd think it was v hard work sad

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Wed 27-Jan-16 21:41:49

Of course it is possible, but if that is your biggest concern then you are getting your priorities wrong imo.

If you are unhappy and it can't be worked on then you need to leave, if you leave then your dc need to be your main concern, you need to get your house, routine, contact, money and life in general sorted and settled for you and them.

Only then should you be considering a new partner. Not before you've even left.

Eggnoggsnog Wed 27-Jan-16 21:43:01

Better than living with an arsehole.

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:44:11

To be fair I sort of know what OP means, that when you consider leaving your whole life (what you thought it would look like) changes.

But, don't start looking for a partner. Look for someone to shag be 'friends with' by all means but not someone serious. Trust me, it'll be too raw.

spad Wed 27-Jan-16 21:45:26

I just want someone to think I am lovely and fun and nice again.

spad Wed 27-Jan-16 21:45:47

I want it to be my husband.

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:46:00

Which is exactly why you don't want to be dating - that sort of neediness is bad news!

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:46:19

I'm struggling to follow here sorry!

Hellojoe Wed 27-Jan-16 21:46:45

It's shit, hard work and very lonely

Dreamonastar Wed 27-Jan-16 21:48:04

It is, but our babies love us smile

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