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AIBU?

Am I being silly (and unreasonable?)

25 replies

Kiddiewinks2008 · 18/12/2015 07:06

DD is 3 and in preschool- she had her last day before xmas yesterday & they have done nothing at the nursery to acknowledge xmas at all- no cards, no decorations, nothing.
The nursery has been taken over since my son was there & before they used to made decorations with the kids, mark occasions - so much so that I still put his decorations on our tree.
Friends at other nurseries have has loads of momentos of how their children mark xmas.
I don't know why its upset me but it feels rubbish that her only christmas in preschool and a moment in time hasnt been marked at all. The staff there are lovely but demoralised and it seems to be affecting everything.
Am I being unreasonable and silly to be upset by this?
I feel like feeding back to the nursery manager that its a bit rubbish!

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Enjolrass · 18/12/2015 07:10

Make things at home?

Dds secondary school doesn't do anything either. It's dds first year so she is a bit disappointed.

I can see why your a bit miffed, but it is unreasonable. They aren't obliged to do it, she won't remember (if she has noticed at all) and she will have years of doing stuff at school.

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Haggisfish · 18/12/2015 07:12

I am on the fence actually. There are so many children of different religions-I don't really think any religious celebrations should be done in school. If it means that much, do it at home or at any of the myriad groups that will do it locally.

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BlueMoonRising · 18/12/2015 07:13

Maybe they have made a choice to not do Christmas in order not to alternate children that are Jewish/Jehovahs/Hindus etc?

Christmas, of itself, isn't really something of educational value to children. It wouldn't bother me.

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 18/12/2015 07:14

I'm very surprised a nursery hadn't at least put a tree up and made some effort for the children.

I'd mention it to the Manager, see what she says.

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BlueMoonRising · 18/12/2015 07:14

Alienate! Not alternate. Hmph.

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Bunbaker · 18/12/2015 07:14

What a shame. I guess that in order not to "offend" anyone who doesn't celebrate Christmas they have decided to ban it completely. Or is it run by Jehovah's Witnesses? Bah humbug!

Interestingly my Muslim and Hindu friends and workmates all acknowledge Christmas, and some of them take part in Christmas activities.

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Hurr1cane · 18/12/2015 07:15

See haggis I think they should celebrate as many religious festivals as they can because they make for lovely, imaginative learning opportunities

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Hurr1cane · 18/12/2015 07:17

And I've yet to meet a Muslim or Hindu or Sikh living in this country that doesn't acknowledge Christmas, most I know even celebrate it in a none religious sort of way.

The only person I've met who wants nothing to do with it is a jehovas witness

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 18/12/2015 07:19

Of course Christmas should be celebrated or are we so worried at causing 'offence' that a Nursery can't even signify it by making cards and putting up decorations and going mad with the glitter and glue?

If that's the case I'd be moving nurseries.

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Bunbaker · 18/12/2015 07:19

Same Hurr1cane. My Hindu friend took her little girl to see Father Christmas last week.

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OhJustGetOnWithIt · 18/12/2015 07:23

It's important to find out why it was ignored rather than assume the nursery didn't want to cause offence. Though I can see you haven't jumped to that conclusion OP.

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Kiddiewinks2008 · 18/12/2015 07:23

They used to have a christmas party before it was taken over- staff would dress up etc and parents would get to have a mince pie and a chat. None of that has happened at all- feels very sad and a bit souless!

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Dipankrispaneven · 18/12/2015 07:29

it feels rubbish that her only christmas in preschool and a moment in time hasnt been marked at all

There really isn't anything massively special about "her only Christmas in pre-school". If you want a memento, get her to sit down and draw you a picture at home.

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Haggisfish · 18/12/2015 07:42

Learn about as many religious ceremonies as possible, yes. Make a massive hoo ha over one? No, I don't think so. I watched the secret life of six year olds last night. One wee lad on there said god isn't real-about five other kids, of different religions, were chanting 'yes he is!!' at this poor kid. If you want to celebrate a religious ceremony, do it at home.

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Katastrophe13 · 18/12/2015 07:51

I think it's sad. Christmas is so much fun and it's exciting for the children to make cards and have a tree. Of course you can do that at home but it's different to doing things at preschool where they can enjoy it with their friends.

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Kiddiewinks2008 · 18/12/2015 07:55

Its not even about religion for me- just about my 3 year old having some xmas fun at nursery, making a decoration, eating a mince pie and having fun with her friends at xmas. It just feels bloody miserable that they didnt do anything! She is there 3.5 days a week! I will do stuff at home but its upset me that the nursery did nothing at all!

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mumofsnotbags · 18/12/2015 07:57

I feel kind of the same with my 3 yr olds pre school, I still pay so he only goes 2 days a week, rather than 5 mornings/afternoons. But even in the days he hasn't been in they haven't done anything, Since it was taken over last year they have done nearly every other religion, i remember the room being decorated with a huge dragon for chinese new year but nothing for christmas.

I took him to see father christmas yesterday and he loved it but agree he would have much more fun with all his friends around, and a few of the other mums have said the same thing. I would just ask are they having a christmas party this year like they did last year (before it was taken over), just to see if she says anything.

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lunar1 · 18/12/2015 08:00

Yanbu. Has anyone actually met anybody in real life that objects to others religious celebrations. Our nursery and school make bits for any celebration that appears on the calendar. We have a lovely variety of child made items, my favourite being the Diwali candle holders. And working in hospital wards for almost 20 years, with people of every faith and culture I've not met a single person who would object to anyone else's traditions.

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HearTheThunderRoar · 18/12/2015 08:05

It has been years since my DD attended creche but they always pushed the boat out with xmas decs at this time of year, I think they even had a fake santa once.

I really shouldn't see why the can't celebrate, it is a Christian country after all.

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CombineBananaFister · 18/12/2015 08:08

I'd be a bit peeved too, you don't have to celebrate christmas in order to acknowledge it exists and use it as a fun learning opportunity. Infact I'm with hurricane, learn about as many seasonal events as possible, religious or not.

Also this 'offense' that everyone harps on about is a bit mythical imho, most of my friends of different cultures just aren't offended, AT all. or maybe I only know reasonable tolerant people. I think the only thing as a parent you'd expect is that all things are learned equally and nothing dominates the actual curriculum. To do nothing in the uk for xmas is odd by its ommision

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CombineBananaFister · 18/12/2015 08:09

x-post lunar!!

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CwtchMeQuick · 18/12/2015 08:12

I don't think yabu (or silly)
DS has made loads of christmas stuff at preschool and I think he'd be disappointed if he hadnt, he's loved it.
Our nursery mark lots of occasions and they did stuff for Diwali recently too and DS made a diya lamp.
I think you could feedback to the preschool that you'd have liked them to have done some christmassy things.
Ds's nursery will also do valentines, easter, Chinese New Year (and they all have a chinese buffet), halloween etc

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ohtheholidays · 18/12/2015 08:24

YANBU,I think that's really sad and you'll probably find that alot of the staff think so as well.

My first ever job I worked in a private Nursery,I was only 16 and the last few weeks before the Nursery broke up for Christmas were magical for the children.The supervisor there was really good,she'd buy every single child a gift and there was a wrapping room set up and we all helped out with wrapping the gifts,there was a massive Christmas party held in the hall of my old secondary school for all 3 of the Nurserys(they were all owned by the same person)all of the staff were there,some parents came from the begining of the party,others came half way through or nearer the end(depending on being able to get away from work)there were long tables all set out with all different party food and drinks for the children,the parents and the staff.The whole of the hall was decorated.

All of the staff had Elf hats on,Christmas hats,or reindeer head bands.
It was really lovely and all of the children,the staff and the parents used to really enjoy it.

In the run up to the party the Nurserys would be decorated and they'd do a different Christmas or winter themed craft every day,once a week the craft was cooking with the children,biscuits,cakes ect that they could take home to share with they're familys.

It was good for morale for the staff and all of the parents really appreciated it.

I think speaking to the Nursery Manager would be a good idea.If no one says anything then they'll never know.

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happystory · 18/12/2015 08:24

I'd be asking the preschool why they didn't. You can hardly ignore Christmas at the mo! Would be interested in their response. Though having worked in preschools at Christmas, the glitter is insane Grin

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Enjolrass · 18/12/2015 08:26

Why are so many assuming it's because they don't want to offend anyone?

Likely it's due to the take over. Maybe things have been up in the air and they decided not to this year.

Maybe the new owner never do it.

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