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Friend didn't wait for me and DD at swimming pool

(50 Posts)
MotorwayMonkey Sun 14-Jun-15 20:45:40

I have a friend who lives in another town from me quite far away and we often meet in a city that is halfway between our two homes. This weekend we arranged to go swimming in said halfway town. I don't drive (which she knows) so this means that I have to lug quite a big bag full of towells, shampoo etc on a bus, a train and then walk about 15 minutes to the swimming pool along with my dawdling 3 yo DD.

We arranged to meet at 10:30am at the pool. It is always really busy on weekends (its quite a nice pool with a couple of flumes so I think that is why it is so popular)) so much so that you are allocated 1 hour slots (with coloured wristbands) when you get there. I arrived bang on time (actually a couple of minutes early). I took my phone out to see that my friend had texted just after 10am to say that she had already arrived and had taken her DD in the pool and we will meet her in there. There was actually a long queue of people waiting to be allowed to go into the pool and me and DD ended up waiting for about 30mins before we were allowed in. This all meant that by the time we joined my friend and her DD, they had to leave shortly after we got there.

I don't know if IABU, but I was annoyed that my friend could not wait for us. We were not late, we got there on time and she knew about how busy it gets and about the 1 hour allocation thing. It annoyed me as I felt one of the main reasons we went was so that our children could enjoy a swim etc together, it is quite a big slog for me taking all the stuff needed and I would have just gone to my local pool 5 minutes from my house if I wanted to take me and DD swimming rather than embarking on an hour plus journey.

I didn't say anything to my friend. I just think this was a bit off.

neighbourhoodwitch Sun 14-Jun-15 20:47:39

totally agree with you. It is off & she should have waited.

Floggingmolly Sun 14-Jun-15 20:48:12

Yes, it was extremely selfish and rude. Why couldn't she have just got a coffee and waited? I'd have said something.

formerbabe Sun 14-Jun-15 20:48:23

Yanbu! That would irritate me...if you are early, wait in the cafe or walk round the block!

Zephyroux Sun 14-Jun-15 20:48:24

It seems a bit mean of her. Why don't you suggest you all go to the one closer to you?

bittapitta Sun 14-Jun-15 20:49:32

She should've waited, you agreed 10.30 and you were there on time. She was rude.

CheekyNanKnows Sun 14-Jun-15 20:51:04

Yanbu. Plain rude.

NorbertDentressangle Sun 14-Jun-15 20:51:37


Surely she realised that by being so early she risked the 1 hr slots only overlapping a bit?

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Sun 14-Jun-15 20:52:40

Very rude. Both to not wait before going in (due to the 1 hour time slots) and for not waiting for you afterwards.

I wouldn't bother going to meet her again TBH. Not unless it is somewhere much more local to you.

BettyCatKitten Sun 14-Jun-15 20:53:27

Yanbu, what was the point of arranging a time?

ItsTricky Sun 14-Jun-15 20:54:00

YANBU. I'd be really pissed off.

NinkyNonkers Sun 14-Jun-15 20:55:48

In normal pool circumstances she would not be unreasonable,but given the time slot etc I think she was a bit. Maybe she didn't realise the length of queue+

kinkyfuckery Sun 14-Jun-15 20:56:37

YANBU she was rude.

However, you seem a bit of a martyr going on about Oh So how much stuff you had to carry. A couple of towels, bottle of shampoo and fresh undies for two can be slung in a rucksack and carried no problem.

InexperiencedDisneyMum Sun 14-Jun-15 20:56:47

She was very rude not to wait.

Why do you need to carry so much stuff though? Two towels and a bottle of shampoo aren't heavy.

1Morewineplease Sun 14-Jun-15 20:58:30

Your friend was incredibly rude!!! You don't sound like the sort of person who would wish to seek revenge... And it's very wrong!... But try and find a way!!!

IUseAnyName Sun 14-Jun-15 21:10:54

Id prob send her an unconfrontational text (because im a coward) explaining that it wasnt on x

Purplepoodle Sun 14-Jun-15 21:11:44

Doesn't matter how u get there but she was rude. Why bother to arrange to meet

IsItStupid Sun 14-Jun-15 21:15:13

Definitely rude! She could have waited.

On a side note, is a taxi actually cheaper for you then all those busses/trains?

Gumps Sun 14-Jun-15 21:27:17

On first read I thought YABU as I would go on in if I was meeting a friend and send a message to say meet you in the pool. However on second read she was there a whole half an hour early and knew there were one hour slots? I'm sure she thought her little one would get bored if she waited and thats her reasoning to herself but very unreasonable behaviour towards you.
I'm not sure I would send a confrontation text but next time she suggests meeting her swimming there I would say no.

Siennasun Sun 14-Jun-15 21:31:16

I wouldn't travel to meet her again. Either she comes local to you or don't bother.

AntiHop Sun 14-Jun-15 21:33:41

Yanbu. Very rude.

CuppaSarah Sun 14-Jun-15 21:41:44

How odd, does her dd have any reasons like sn that may have made it difficult for her to understand why they had to wait? Even so, why arrive early if that was the case? It's all so unnecessary and rude. Yadnbu!

HeartsTrumpDiamonds Sun 14-Jun-15 21:44:37

Very rude indeed and what a disappointment for your DD.

JeanSeberg Sun 14-Jun-15 21:48:12

Yes she was rude and as she had to leave straight after the swimming what was the point in going all that way just for an hour?

Fatmomma99 Sun 14-Jun-15 21:51:40

Totally agree - bloody rude. YNBU. Assume her child is also around 3? Maybe not good at waiting. Tough - it was supposed to be a shared experience.

Crap of her. I'd be livid.

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