My friend is pregnant with her second DC. Her first is a DS just turned 3.
I have an 8 year old, a 5 year old, and am pregnant with DC3.
Friend's DS can be a handful, but no more than any other child. However she constantly complains about his behaviour, says he is horrible to other children, he only misbehaves with her, she doesn't know what to do with him. I have always reassured her that it's hard but it does get better.
He does normal toddler things- running off, not sitting in his seat, snatching a toy.Friend will say things like 'look at that, I mean how am I meant to stop that'- but she doesn't DO anything. She just sits there
Yesterday we met for coffee. Her DS was a bit excitable at first, but the waitress brought out some crayons and a colouring book, and he settled pretty well.
That evening, my friend rang me, and had a massive tirade about how awful her DS was, how impossible his behaviour was. I tried to reassure her, as I always do, said it was just normal behaviour. I told her a few anecdotes about my eldest at a similar age, who was an absolute demon, but is now very quiet and shy,and how nobody believes me when i say how difficult they were when younger
It was like speaking to a brick wall. She just kept saying 'but he does this..he does that..I mean how am I meant to stop that'
I suggested a few books/techniques that helped me with my eldest. She said 'well none of that will work with DS' and words to that effect
AIBU to think how does she know if she hasn't TRIED anything?
Firstly, her DS's behaviour is pretty normal- other people apart from me have told her that
Secondly, she makes no effort to TRY to sort the issues she has with him- she just assumes it won't work? He runs off a lot, and ages ago I suggested one of those little backpacks with the reins attached- she said 'he'll just lie there and tantrum'.
I feel like a bitch for saying this, but I'm really losing patience with her. All she seems to do these days is complain about her DS. She does it in front of him too. It's like she has no concept that X behaviour is normal, but you still might want to do Y to sort it out/make it easier for yourself. I think she expected her baby to emerge from the womb with perfect manners, & she is confused and aghast when that doesn't happen
AIBU?
To think some people can't cope with children acting like children?
periwinkleshoes · 31/01/2015 17:22
Yanbu I know a couple of people like this. They all say ohhhhh it's ok for you you're so laid back. I'm not......I just don't freak out at a 6 year old running around on grass, in a park, that's empty 
is that not what they are meant to do?? 
That poor kid. He must hear how awful he is on a regular basis 
If it was me and I kept getting those responses from my friend I think I'd end up losing my temper a bit. I'd point out how sad it is that her little boy has to hear how awful his mother thinks he is and if she's not prepared to actually try anything then she needs to shut up!
I have a 3.5 ds and he's a handful. He doesn't stop talking/moving from the moment he wakes up (6am) till he goes to bed at night (7.30). I'm permanently exhausted but I realise (most of the time) that he's 3! This won't last forever and one day I'll miss this stage.
Your friend sounds awful.
March, that's exactly how I eat to this day! Wonder what your dad and MIL would make of that! 
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.