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To be pissed off at dp interrupting me?

(44 Posts)
saltedcaramelicious Fri 23-Jan-15 18:03:46

My partner has a bad habit of interrupting me angry
Today we were having a conversation about something normal and trivial to do with work, which I began. He them says a few sentences about it, and pauses for a few seconds. During this pause I say something along the lines of "yes and I think that is why -" and I am them cut off by DP launching into another comment linked to what he'd said before.

He does this often, I have mentioned it to him and he says he doesn't realise he's doing it. He does it when we are alone also in groups.
It's started to irritate me, to the point where when he interrupts me I lose all interest in the conversation and give up talking. I've found myself rushing my speech when I talk to him as I am anticipating being talked over.
When it happens in groups I feel even worse!

When he stops talking I feel like saying "as I was sayinf......"

If I ever accidentally interrupt anyone, I apologise and ask them to continue.

Why can't he do this?! angry

And breathe....

Theboodythatrocked Fri 23-Jan-15 18:06:09

Get a wooden talking spoon and make him use it. No spoon no talk and he can't hog the spoon.

Jengnr Fri 23-Jan-15 18:07:40

Try 'I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence get in the way of the start of yours?'

Works when my husband does it. Annoying fucker.

Singleandproud Fri 23-Jan-15 18:13:16

I do it all the time. I don't mean too and I kick myself afterwards and apologise.

Oldraver Fri 23-Jan-15 18:17:44

I do say to my Mum....^as I was saying^ or outright tell her I was talking

roland83 Fri 23-Jan-15 18:19:18

My boyfriend used to do this a lot... I just started to say how rude it was, time and time again.

Now he apologises if he accidentally interrupts me. You know, like a normal person. grin

Rinoachicken Fri 23-Jan-15 18:30:00

My DH does this, doesn't realise it etc. I have started saying 'please let me finish' and he then apologises and looks suitably sheepish.

It's a habit but one that can be broken I think in time

peachgirl Sat 24-Jan-15 10:30:20

My mum, dad, and brother all do this to me and it drives me insane. I usually go with a steely-eyed glare (to quote Helen Fielding, Genghis-Khan-at-height-of-evil) and emphasise very clearly, "I was talking", which instants shames them into an apology. I think they really don't realise they're doing it, but it's so disrespectful.

GoringBit Sat 24-Jan-15 10:35:40

OH and I are both guilty of this from time to time, but mindfulness and the occasional death stare, we do it less than we used to.

OP keep calm, keep on (gently but clearly) when he does it, and things should change for the better.

SanityClause Sat 24-Jan-15 10:37:33

DH used to do this, and his mother does it, so to him, it is normal.

He used to do it to me, and to other people. If I caught him at it, I would always pull him up on it - "I am speaking", or "X was speaking".

He has improved greatly.

(When his mother does it, I wait for her to finish, and then start saying exactly what I was saying before the interruption. I don't think I have such a right to pull her up on manners, and also I don't see her often enough for it to be more than a little niggle.)

googoodolly Sat 24-Jan-15 10:47:30

I used to do this blush. It's just a bad habit, it's not intentional. DP pulled me up on it and and kept doing so until I stopped. It's a hard habit to break really but it can be done. Just tell him how rude it is and do it EVERY time. He'll learn eventually. I did!

ImBatDog Sat 24-Jan-15 10:52:09

maybe its just a bad example, but if he's paused to think, and then carried on.. aren't you interrupting him?

Perhaps you should check if he's actually finished before speaking yourself, and then he wouldn't interrupt you?

ScrambledEggAndToast Sat 24-Jan-15 11:38:05

One of my real pet hates when people do this, best to pick them up on it. Or if you finish saying something and, without acknowledging what you've just said, they start talking about something completely different angry I feeling like saying "Erm, excuse me, did you hear me?". Even if someone has just finished a five minute spiel on the worlds most boring topic I will at least acknowledge it.

Gatehouse77 Sat 24-Jan-15 11:42:39

My DH does this sometimes mainly because he's still thinking about his response and it's a pause rather than an end.
Still bloody frustrating at times.

If we're having a serious chat then we put a hand on our head when we've finished speaking!

IHeartKingThistle Sat 24-Jan-15 11:47:15

I do this a bit and then cringe. My mum does it all the time. I have experimented a few times with just keeping on talking when she interrupts to see if she will let me finish. She just keeps going no matter how long I do it for!

GlitzAndGigglesx Sat 24-Jan-15 11:47:16

Mine does this so I just say "I was talking" and carry on

laughingmyarseoff Sat 24-Jan-15 11:52:24

"Let me finishing making my point." or "As I was saying." or "My turn now." if you are unsure if he's finished.

laughingmyarseoff Sat 24-Jan-15 11:52:58

My turn now? rather

ImperialBlether Sat 24-Jan-15 12:04:17

I don't mean to suggest this of you, OP, but I've got a couple of friends who literally never shut up. They can talk for hours and hours without a break and if you didn't interrupt them you'd never speak. Has anyone else found a way around this?

SaucyJack Sat 24-Jan-15 12:12:31

I do it to DP but only when he's blithering on about something mind-numbingly dull.

Summerisle1 Sat 24-Jan-15 12:25:06

I have a friend who does this. Unfortunately, once she has the conversational bit between her teeth it becomes every more difficult to stop her. I'm afraid that I have now reverted to dealing with her as I did my dcs when they were very small. I simply say "I'm talking right now. Just let me finish". It is surprisingly successful although you really shouldn't need to treat an adult like a toddler!

springlamb Sat 24-Jan-15 12:31:05

DH and I do this a lot to each other. We recently realised that our dc (teens) do it too. So we are all trying to address it as a group - it sounds silly but whilst we are talking or making our point over the dinner table we hold our forefinger up. We also make a point of a thanking each other for listening.
At least during the recent 4 hour power cut we weren't at a loss for conversation and it always makes for lively dinner times. I suppose I should be glad that the dc have their opinions and can make points/debate/discussed. But who gave permission for their opinions to be so different from my own?!?

CrispyFern Sat 24-Jan-15 12:37:07

DH does this so I keep a packet of peanuts in my pocket and if he ever interrupts me I throw one at his forehead.

ZombieApocalypse Sat 24-Jan-15 12:37:33

DH has a bit of a tendency to do this which he seems to get from MIL. It drives me mad and I always pull him up on it now if he does it. Usually, I just say 'can I finish what I was saying?'

He has said he doesn't realise he's doing it but he does apologise when I point it out and makes an effort not to.

DealForTheKids Sat 24-Jan-15 12:41:28

I do this really badly. It's no excuse but DM, DF and DSis all do it - we're a real family of impatient debaters - chat is great but I am aware it's incredibly rude. DH knows when I'm about to do it and gives me a hard state which reminds me to shut up but its a hard habit to break!!

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