Having Brownie pamper evenings

[Fluffyowll27]

Felt I had to defend our Pamper evening after reading previous threads complaining about such inappropriate activities for Brownies. Rather than a beauty night, it's more a relax, calm down, take stock evening following a hectic term. We have - built tents from newspapers, completed a science investigator badge, investigated how to navigate outside in the dark, had treasure hunts, made biscuits, been to a theme park, made paper poppies etc etc now we will have a fun evening with scented candles, bubbly foot baths (own towels brought to prevent cross infection!!) cucumber face packs, oatmeal moisturiser the girls can make and to complete some background music of Tibetan gongs and maybe a few whale calls for good measure. We do this yearly and the Brownies love it, the hall smells gorgeous and when the girls are collected its noticeable how calm they are. We leaders however then spend half an hour cleaning up and go home shattered to prepare for work the next day!!! But it's worth it.

[HairStylistToBoris]

Sounds like a lot of effort went in to having a brownies evening with a difference and good on you for leading brownies.
But the other thread was from 2013, why dig it out and now start a fresh thread?

[berceuse]

No sympathy here - I was mortified when my then 7 year old came home from a Brownie pamper evening smelling like a boudoir and wearing make up. I had to stick her in the bath at 10pm because she was itching from all the horribly smelly cream she had put on.

Completely inappropriate for that age, absolutely not encouraged here, little girls do not need to be involved with that sort of thing imo, maybe better suited to Guides.

[newgirl]

If cubs and scouts do the same then fine by me

[flapjackattack]

I'd seriously consider withdrawing DD from Brownies if her unit pushed a pamper evening. They're 7 -10. They really needn't give a flying lego brick about prettyifying themselves/ moisturiser or such.

[berceuse]

Flapjack - we are seriously re-thinking, has definitely changed our view of it. DH was probably more annoyed than me.

It definitely ignited an interest in that sort of thing, lip gloss has been requested (and refused), etc., etc.. That would never have happened before the Brownie evening.

Very bad influence at such a young age.

[TheCowThatLaughs]

There must be other ways for primary school children to relax that don't involve using adult cosmetics. There will be plenty of time in a few years for them to be made aware of their appearances, let them relax and be unaware for now

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

You can teach girls to reflect on what they've achieved, relax and take stock without introducing an element of beautifying to it.

When I went to Brownies it was about getting grubby, making things out of sticks and learning to read maps. What on earth has happened!

[parakeet]

Dear OP - I would be reluctant to criticise any brownie leaders as I know they put so much time and effort into entertaining our daughters...BUT I would privately be really disappointed if my daughter's pack did something like this.

Facepacks...moisturiser...? This is part of the adult beauty industry that is being rejected by a growing number of women (myself included). My daughter's skin is beautiful just as it is, and I will feel sad when the day arrives she becomes convinced she needs to spend £££ to pass some sort of society-imposed standards. Please don't hasten that day.

[itiswhatitiswhatitis]

Hmm I don't have daughters but I don't really like the idea of using face asks and moisturiser on little girls. A chill out pyjama party type thing with some child appropriate relaxation type activities, sharing stories etc that's fine but they're children their bodies don't need pampering.

I must add I loathe to criticise anyone who runs these types of groups as I think on the whole you provide a wonderful community experience for children and I know you give up a lot of time and energy to do it.

[MassaAttack]

newgirl, why should girls be restricted to what Cubs and Scouts do?

[stealthsquiggle]

I would have a real issue with this. As the mother of an 8yo Brownie who is starting to say things like "I'm not pretty" I would be very cross with anything that encouraged her to think she needed stuff to make herself pretty.

Fortunately her brownie leaders have a programme packed full of active stuff, a pantomime to rehearse and goodness knows what else with no sign of such nonsense.

[drudgetrudy]

As long as its part of a varied programme with all the adventure thing too I can't see any problem.
As an adult I would enjoy a bit of pampering, it doesn't stop me being independent and earning my own living doing what I want to do.
If anyone thinks their DD wouldn't enjoy it they could keep them home-but my guess is that most girls would love it.

There are a lot of fun police around [grin}

[drudgetrudy]

I mean

[Waitingonasunnyday]

I think a chill out evening with whale music and scented candles in a relaxing atmosphere is fine. Not so fine is the beauty side of it.

[manicinsomniac]

Sounds like great fun to me. Huge range of activities to suit different children, time spent together as a group building friendships, something for everyone. Good on you for putting so much effort into something like that outside of work, I couldn't do it. I bet the children had a fantastic time.

[drudgetrudy]

PS it doesn't sound as if there was a real focus on appearance -just pampering-the difference between a mini-spa and a makeover? Anything like a makeover I would object to.

[itiswhatitiswhatitis]

Because cubs aren't being taught to become preoccupied with appearance and beauty. I know quite a few parents moving their dd's over to beavers and cubs now and there are quite a lot of girls in ds's cubs pack which is great to see.

[MrsMook]

Our Brownies have a beauty box, and the effect usually ends up being rather less subtle and serious than Mr Tumble's Aunt Polly. Young girls always have liked to play dress up. We also do things like making outfits with newspaper. Again it's all part of a balanced programme. This term has featured an engineering museum, games running round the woods in the dark, and a night where each six plans their own activities.

If anyone feels they can do better at planning the programme each term without repeating what the 10 year olds did 3 years earlier, I recommend signing up through the Join Us website. Most units are very keen for more support.

[Trinpy]

I'm impressed that you can get an entire Brownie pack to stay still long enough to do all this! The Brownies I used to help out with would probably have been lobbing oatmeal at each other within the first 15 minutes. Spirited.

[MaudantWit]

I'm a Brown Owl.

I share the concerns about young girls becoming preoccupied with body image - in fact, Girlguiding campaigns on this issue - but think the occasional pamper evening as part of a varied programme is unobjectionable. It's years since we had one but, when we did, it was all about relaxation. The Brownies gave each other hand massages. There was no make-up involved.

[kentishgirl]

It doesn't sound like it's really a makeover/cosmetics thing. I was the least girly girl ever, (still am) and I like smelly candles and relaxing. I used to love a bubbly foot bath as a kid as well as it feels good, my mum used to have one of those foot spa things I'd use. And I used to copy mum by putting slices of cucumbers on my eyes - it's refreshing when you are tired and stressed.

Relaxation stuff, I don't see anything wrong with it.

Beautifying stuff (bit dubious about the facemask or moisturiser), not really keen on for this age group.

[Idontseeanysontarans]

Considering the state DD comes home in from Brownies sometimes - Brown Owl can find something to do with either wellies and mud or clay, paint and glitter for every occasion a relaxation evening sounds like a good idea !
I don't like seeing young girls doing the pamper thing generally and hate make up on them but this seems ok.
I've seen the hard work our volunteers put in for the pack first hand and salute them (and you) for it. One evening of something a little bit different is not going to turn a child into a looks obsessed little madam.

[Sprink]

I don't think all the Brownies are going to start insisting on spa days after this activity, any more than I think they're all going to go to engineering school from the museum visit.

It's one activity amongst many, many others.

As for Cubs not being preoccupied with appearance, of course not--they're too busy learning to fix things, but any mother of a teenage son will tell you that a Hygiene/Look A Bit Smarter/Comb Your Hair For Crying Out Loud Badge wouldn't necessarily be unwelcome…

By the way, Brown Owls (and anyone who devotes extraordinary amounts of time, energy, and thought to their communities through volunteering) are the bomb.

[Waitingonasunnyday]

My DS Cub is MUCH more concerned with his looks than DD Brownie. If Cubs had a set of Gelling Your Hair Badges he'd have an armful.