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AIBU to think that this is a bit weird?

(44 Posts)
LaVieBoheme Fri 22-Aug-14 21:15:37

Long time lurker, first time poster!

Earlier, I went to a takeaway. While waiting for my order, the man serving me was just chatting to me about my degree and other small talk. Then, he randomly asks me if I am a lesbian (I am). I felt a bit shocked that he randomly asked me this but said yes anyway. He then proceeded to tell me that he just "had a feeling" that I was gay (bear in mind I am probably as feminine as you can get, so not working on stereotypes). He told me not to be offended by this, and then also asked me why some lesbians refuse to even talk to men (not that I have ever come across anyone like that, personally) before I got my order and left pretty quickly.

AIBU to think that this whole conversation was a bit weird?

Vitalstatistix Fri 22-Aug-14 21:20:16

No. It was weird.

BeerTricksPotter Fri 22-Aug-14 21:20:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IAMACLANGER Fri 22-Aug-14 21:23:46

Perhaps he's just a very good judge of character? You're obviously quite friendly if chatting about your degree etc. It's not something I'd dream of asking someone! I don't think I would notice.
I've never heard of lesbians refusing to talk to men...
What did you order?

Moreisnnogedag Fri 22-Aug-14 21:24:15

That's not just a bit weird but proper hmm back away slowly weird.

LaVieBoheme Fri 22-Aug-14 21:29:32

I'm glad it isn't just me! When I told my friend what had happened, she didn't seem to think there was anything wrong with it, he was just being friendly!

Clanger Me neither, if anything, most of the lesbians I know talk to more men than women! I ordered a BBQ chicken calzone and cheesy chips, which despite the chat, was bloody lovely!

CromerSutra Fri 22-Aug-14 21:34:26

I am a lesbian, also very feminine, I get asked this outright more often than you would think and then this seems to bring on all sorts of really intrusive questions. If I'm feeling charitable I think "people are genuinely curious, they just want to know". If I'm not I think "fgs butt out! It's none of your bloody business"! Yanbu

LiberalLibertines Fri 22-Aug-14 21:39:21

That's crazy! No-one would dare ask who I preferred to sleep with, in a random passing chat. Cheeky bastard.

(Take away sounds lovely though)

Andrewofgg Fri 22-Aug-14 21:40:26

"If you must know I am in a long term relationship with a monkey. Male monkey, of course, what sort of weirdo do you take me for? Now please pass the ketchup. Then fuck off"

IAMACLANGER Fri 22-Aug-14 21:45:25

I can't fathom people being so rude as to comment. I'm not a lesbian, but not particularly feminine either (a bit lazy on the make-up/make an effort front!). Perhaps there's a certain vibe or something that men can detect. No idea really.
But that takeaway sounds bloody lovely! Maybe if you'd ordered a salad he wouldn't have asked.....!!!!!

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Fri 22-Aug-14 21:45:49

We had a thread recently about 'lesbian hair'.

I was unaware of it but apparently it is 'a thing'.

(I have 'lesbian boots' according to my DWSiL. Am not gay, but apparently my boots makes everyone think I am.)


Could you possibly have 'lesbian hair'?


LiberalLibertines Fri 22-Aug-14 21:46:44

grin Andrew

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Fri 22-Aug-14 21:47:35

Maybe if you'd ordered a salad he wouldn't have asked.....!!!!!

Yes, it's known in the take away community that lesbians despise salad!


IAMACLANGER Fri 22-Aug-14 21:52:28

OK KingJoffreysBloodshotEye ... I know you're laughing at me. And I'm laughing at your comment! What I meant was, oh f*&^, not sure what I meant really, but how can someone tell, and how does someone have the audacity to comment?

Heebiejeebie Fri 22-Aug-14 21:58:19

I think you should mull over why you answered a question that felt intrusive.

awsomer Fri 22-Aug-14 22:06:19

YANBU, quite odd.

But now I kinda want to see what you look like to see how good his guess was

awsomer Fri 22-Aug-14 22:07:57

Heebie, what would you have said?

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Fri 22-Aug-14 22:15:09

how does someone have the audacity to comment?

People have no boundaries.

And sometimes there's a little hiccup between they're brain and their mouth.

DocDaneeka Fri 22-Aug-14 22:17:41

I have lesbian hair AND lesbian shoes apparently. (??!WTF)

I'm not lesbian though.

LiberalLibertines Fri 22-Aug-14 22:20:41

What are lesbian shoes?

I'm thinking dead comfy like doc Martin's, if so, I'm a lesbian shoe wearer, and proud.

DownstairsMixUp Fri 22-Aug-14 22:23:59

Very odd and rude. When I had short hair I had two people say it made me look like a lesbian. confused Nice to see the stereotypes are still full on out there. I did call them out to. Rude fuckers.

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Fri 22-Aug-14 22:27:35

Yes. DMs. I have several pairs. Favourites are brown wedgie ones.

DickWadSiL always said, I looked like a 'lady who liked ladies' (not that I gave a feck).

Not just once either. She'd say it all of the time.

I suspect she's projecting. Especially as she has similar boots but cheaper.

She's rude though. Slags off everyone who isn't her.

LaVieBoheme Fri 22-Aug-14 22:30:59

Well shit, next time I'll be sure to order salad too!

As for my hair, it is about chest length and thrown up into a bun, so no short at all! My shoes were very scruffy ballet flats.

Heebie Well I'm not insecure about my sexuality at all so I don't mind people knowing, I just usually don't go from being asked if I enjoy my degree to do I enjoy having sex with women confused

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Fri 22-Aug-14 22:40:24

Ah, here's the lesbian hair picture.

Disclaimer: I have several lesbian friends (must ask them if they like salad) and none of them have there haircuts?

OP, could the take away man have seen you with a partner/girlfriend?

LaVieBoheme Fri 22-Aug-14 22:44:17

King I did wonder that, as I have been in there before with my OH but that was a good few months ago and I rarely pass by, so if he did then he has amazing memory!

The haircuts picture may be my new favourite thing. I have seen each of them my OH alone seems to have had half of them in the last four years!

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