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To be getting irritated with a friend endlessly asking small favours?

(44 Posts)
CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 19:41:30

I have a good friend who is a lot of fun BUT seems to need a small favour rather often. I am wondering whether I am being petty.

Rexandralpf Thu 03-Apr-14 19:42:46

What favours? How close are you?

Back2Two Thu 03-Apr-14 19:43:06

You would have to give a bit more info for opinions really

MammaTJ Thu 03-Apr-14 20:02:29

Depends. Would she be willing to return favours if asked?

I borrowed £3 from a friend this morning as the obnoxious twat of a neighbour of mine driver wouldn't said he couldn't change my £10 note. I paid her back when we met on the return journey.

I have bought her a meal when she has been too skint to feed herself as well as her DC though. I may have ordered a huge thing for me and then made out I couldn't eat it all

Neighbours the nice ones often knock on my door and ask for small things, but I can do the same to them too.

Could you ask her, even if you have not had the need so far?

mummy1973 Thu 03-Apr-14 21:02:10

Depends what your definition of friend is?

scarffiend Thu 03-Apr-14 21:05:12

Either the favours are not very small, they are never repaid or she's not that good of a friend. Need background to understand a bit more.

Lilaclily Thu 03-Apr-14 21:29:43

depends what favours obviously!

Lilaclily Thu 03-Apr-14 21:30:18

either she's askign for a quick lift back from Cubs or she's askign for a full shop from M&S


CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 21:35:12

She has asked to borrow a place we go to at the weekends for the last week in August without mentioning that it's the bank holiday (we would be there usually so it would put us out).

We work in the same industry but different companies. She is senior to me and keeps asking me technical questions and getting irritable when I d

CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 21:35:57

Don't know the answer (haven't done that role for a while and the regs have changed).

CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 21:37:28

I am being petty - it just feels like every time I hear from her, she mentions something she'd like help with.

ExitPursuedByABear Thu 03-Apr-14 21:38:48

She wants to use your holiday home?

Lilaclily Thu 03-Apr-14 21:40:23

oh you had a previous thread about the holiday home

CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 21:41:17

Yeah, we are cool with our friends and family using it but it feels as though she is being quite pushy about it (and keeps wanting it when it is a bank holiday which is when we would use it).

gamerchick Thu 03-Apr-14 21:44:30

I had a couple of friends who were constantly asking for favours.. it got to the point where they would pop up with a cheery HIYA and I would be sitting there wondering what they would ask for.

I ditched their arses and felt better for it.

Mrswellyboot Thu 03-Apr-14 21:47:22

I would just tell her that you don't lend the lets on bank holidays

Everytime you help at work, stall it a little bit but obviously get your own work done first

Mrswellyboot Thu 03-Apr-14 21:47:34


Polarn Thu 03-Apr-14 21:49:20

I have a friend who always asks for favours. It fucks me off too as it's all the time. I avoid her now in the hope that she will be fully phased out eventually!

Viviennemary Thu 03-Apr-14 21:53:36

I wouldn't call asking to use your holiday home a small favour. I think it's massively cheeky to ask to use someone's second home. If you are offered then great but it puts people in a difficult position when they don't want to.

LIDLrichard Thu 03-Apr-14 21:55:35

What have you told her re: holiday home? No, I hope.

You don't sound petty, she sounds irritating.

missymayhemsmum Thu 03-Apr-14 21:57:15

It's always great to be able to do a favour as you have 'one in the bank' iyswim but if it's not convenient/ puts you out/ you don't want to then say NO!

CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 22:07:20

Well I said that we'd get back to her as we'll be using it in the summer but we're not sure whether we'll be there over the August bank holiday. I think what's irritated me is she said can she have it for the week from 23 August without acknowledging that this includes the bank holiday.

ADishBestEatenCold Thu 03-Apr-14 22:16:37

I think I remember your other thread. Was your holiday home not very special to you and really more of a home from home, rather than somewhere you might 'let' or continually have others fill when it was empty? Also did she not borrow it before, then use all your personal stuff?

I think you should simply just tell her, "sorry, but I'd better say no, as I don't really know yet what our own plans are or those of our families, and I wouldn't want to let you down at the last moment".

Mimishimi Thu 03-Apr-14 22:23:00

YANBU to be irritated but YABU to think that lending your holiday home on a bank holiday weekend is a small favour. It's really quite a large one. Even if they were just small favours, asked too often they all add up into a big one. Just say no if you don't want to.

CruCru Thu 03-Apr-14 22:24:57

I don't think I've put any other threads up about my holiday home. Might be wrong but I think that's someone else.

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