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AIBU?

To think future generations are entitled to inheritance

61 replies

buffythebarbieslayer · 29/03/2014 09:58

I know this isn't a popular view on here but I just don't understand why people think no one should expect to inherit from their parents.

I think that generation have benefited from rising property prices, cheap oil etc. In turn they have raped the planet and left a younger generation struggling economically and facing environmental disaster.

To hang onto wealth in the view that 'it is mine' and 'why should I leave a penny to my children' is in my view selfish.

I'm not saying parents shouldn't live their life and make sure their needs are met but I feel as a parent myself I want to think of future generations too. If passing on a little wealth helps then that is what I shall do.

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gordyslovesheep · 29/03/2014 10:00

You ate entitled to nothing ...not a single brass bean

Your patents don't owe you

Personally id rather my mum spent the lot having fun while alive than I get a penny of it

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msrisotto · 29/03/2014 10:04

I really dislike the way you have used rape in that context.

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lottieandmia · 29/03/2014 10:04

I think it is selfish not to want to help your children out if you can and to leave it all to the cats home when you have children who could really benefit.

But ultimately nobody has the right to expect an inheritance sadly and it's not really anyone's business what someone decides to do with their money.

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WooWooOwl · 29/03/2014 10:05

I don't think people are entitled to inheritance, not at all.

But people are (or should be) entitled to leave their own money and property to their children, if they, as the owners of those things, choose to do so.

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hiddenhome · 29/03/2014 10:05

I think inheritance is a good thing and you're lucky if you happen to benefit from it. In most cases it's natural to want to pass something on to your children.

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NearTheWindymill · 29/03/2014 10:05

DH and I don't expect or feel entitled to inherit anything from our parents. Mine are extravagant and I doubt there will be much left; DH's were unfailingly mean, their children have no fun memories, and vast amounts of money were amassed. We both feel it would have been better if they had forged a middle path somewhere inbetween but on balance feel that my side have had more joy and have better memories.

That aside, it is our intention to leave as much as possible equally to our children who are now older teenagers. Our DC aren't entitled at all but we will do whatever we can to help them in the future and really really want to do that having had very little help or support ourselves.

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buffythebarbieslayer · 29/03/2014 10:06

I actually won't inherit a bean as I lost my mother youngand don't know my father.

If you follow an eco feminist viewpoint then rape is exactly the right phrase to use.

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meditrina · 29/03/2014 10:08

It depends on how you view property.



Or something that the state lets you have for a while (100% tax on inheritance and/or gifts)?

Or something owned by someone other than you, who can tell you what you can do with it and when?

Is it something you own, and choose what to do with?

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IsChippyMintonExDirectory · 29/03/2014 10:09

Sorry but I agree with others - were entitled to nothing, anything we get is a bonus. I plan to leave any assets to my children but I won't be scrimping and saving to do this, I'll enjoy my retirement and splurge. Besides, assuming it live that long, my children will be middle aged and I'm assuming they'll be as comfortably off as they're ever gonna be.

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buffythebarbieslayer · 29/03/2014 10:13

I don't really expect people to skimp and save just to leave money.

But I think it's right that anything left should be left equally between children.

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TheSporkforeatingkyriarchy · 29/03/2014 10:23

Western eco feminism would say that is exactly the right phrase to use - many other environmental feminist branches would disagree. Western feminism, eco or otherwise, does not have the entire hold on the women's rights and there are many branches that would argue that while the West stole resources to pass along to their children many people were raped and mutilated and comparing those thefts to those actions is part of why they are so brushed over and discussed.

No one is 'entitled' to an inheritance and since most of the wealthiest people got that way through inheritance from businesses that did the very actions we're complaining about, surely the entitled are those whose resources were stolen if we are to argue from a social justice point of view. The entire argument about getting an inheritance at all is a rather privileged position.

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TheSporkforeatingkyriarchy · 29/03/2014 10:24

*and are not discussed.

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NotSuchASmugMarriedNow · 29/03/2014 10:26

They don't call them the "ME" generation for nothing.

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buffythebarbieslayer · 29/03/2014 10:28

Good points TheStork

And yes I suppose my view was western centric.

Maybe wealth should be passed onto poor nations instead?

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janey68 · 29/03/2014 10:30

I don't think any of us are entitled to inherit anything. It works the other way round.. It's up to the owner to choose how to distribute their assets. Personally I would share mine equally among my children but its my decision; no one is automatically entitled.

Also, I don't find this attitude of blaming an entire generation for whatever ills of society went on, or envying them for the fortunes of their generation, particularly helpful of accurate. There are upsides and downsides to living as part of any particular generation and so to cherry pick the issues you want to hold against them is a bit pointless.

So its true that my own parents were able to buy their first time in their mid twenties on one wage, and my mother actually didn't work at all from having my older sister until I went to secondary school (and even then just did a bit of part time work for pin money.) However, I consider myself fortunate to have lived through an era where I've been able to continue my career, where nurseries exist, and where it's considered normal for dads to be hands on from the moment of birth (indeed, they are actually allowed at the birth!)

Generalising about entire generations is never helpful, and anyway, whatever the pros and cons of living through a particular era, I think the OP is wrong to assume entitlement about inheritance anyway

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janey68 · 29/03/2014 10:31

Buy their first home!

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RunnerHasbeen · 29/03/2014 10:32

You are muddling up arguments about a whole generation with those of individuals and choice. In some ways it is people looking out for themselves that has caused the societal problems you mention, but I don't think that is linked to people not paasing things on to their own children. Quite the reverse, as paying inheritance tax passes it on to the next generation as a whole. You need to clarify why you feel the destruction of the planet is linked to people not leaving money to their children. Where are you implying it is going then? Tax, charities, spending on their own elderly care? All surely benefit future generations more as a group than passing on a savings account?

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StrawberryCheese · 29/03/2014 10:36

I don't think we are entitled, our parents spent money on bringing us up after all so it's not like they have never given us anything. I also think that generalising an entire generation is wrong. My mum was 45 when she bought her first home and will be paying off her mortgage when she is 70. I don't expect to receive anything from her.

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Nocomet · 29/03/2014 10:38

I don't think any one is entitled to anything, but I agree totally that people should be able to choose to pass their money on to those they love.

It shouldn't be yet another way of the government taking a cut.

Personally, I stand to inherit absolutely nothing as DSIS lives with and cares for my parents. When they die it will still be her home and I wouldn't dream of getting her to sell it.

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Trooperslane · 29/03/2014 10:38

I 100% agree with Woowoo

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Hoppinggreen · 29/03/2014 10:40

My parents brought me up and fed and clothed me, it wasn't always perfect ( narc father) but I didn't go without much. I gut a scholarship to private school but they had to pay for extras and then they helped fund me through Uni. They then helped support me until I got a job. After they split up my mum met my stepdad and she had a bit more money and she helped me in an emergency when needed. She babysits most of the time if I ask and helps me ( non financial ) if I ask and she's available. She has her own life as well.
She owns her house and has some savings but the only things I actually expect are a couple of rings which she has promised me which are worth a bit but that I want for sentimental reasons and 1 painting that she says she wants me to have because it reminds her of my daughter.
Anything else I get would be a pleasant surprise, I don't count on anything - what if she needs it to fund care or anything?
I expect nothing financial from her at all and to be honest anything I did get would probably be put away for our children. My step dad has also left me some money in his will too, which I didn't expect and again this will be for our children.

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3littlefrogs · 29/03/2014 10:42

I live in London.
I am still paying the mortgage on my house and will not pay it off until I have retired.
My grown up (early 20s) DC have no hope of ever affording a home of their own anywhere in the South East. They are working, but living at home.
On paper, the house is worth about 9 times what we paid for it.
When we die the DC will be forced to sell it to pay inheritance tax and will then be homeless.
I do worry about that.
I don't want to have to up sticks and move because at the moment we all work in London.
Ideally I would like the Dc to be able to keep the house.
I don't really have anything in the way of actual money to leave them.

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fishybits · 29/03/2014 10:42

My DM inherited a trust which has been in effect for 5 generations. It is supposed to be passed down and divided between me and my two siblings for us to then pass down etc. She has decided to break the trust and spend every last penny on herself and pass nothing on because apparently "it's too complicated to divide between three"

Was I relying on it? No.

Would it have been nice to have? Yes.

Do I resent her for doing it? A little.

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LtEveDallas · 29/03/2014 11:05

I've spent the last 10 years telling my parents to spend their money. They exist on very little, sitting in a cold house and eating shit food whilst their 'savings' sit untouched in the bank so that they can 'leave the kids something'. My sister and I have actually had to swear that anything they give us will go to the local cats home (mum hates cats) if they dare to leave us anything. I've been known to scream "I don't want your bloody money - go on bloody holiday" when my mum is sitting there shivering in a cardi.

I'm not going to deny that a £10k windfall would come in very handy for me, but you know what, I don't fucking want it and I don't think I am entitled to it. Mum and dad gave me a good life and I want them to enjoy the end of theirs.

I'll make my own money thanks.

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itsmeitscathy · 29/03/2014 11:08

My parents have sacrificed a lot for me over the years and put me through Uni etc. I want them to enjoy their own money, do things they want to do and live comfortably as they age. I don't want them to leave it for me.

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