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To take myself out for dinner?

(66 Posts)
PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 21:58:10

I have recently started singing in a choir which rehearses far enough away from home that I can't get home from work and out again to choir without having such a short space of time at home that it would be pointless. (I have a long commute to work as well). I therefore have the choice of staying late at work before going to choir, or going into town and killing time before choir.

Last night the journey was quick and I ended up in town with a good hour and a half to kill before choir. I was hungry. Therefore, I took myself out for dinner to a dim sum restaurant and had a cocktail . It was lovely and I went to choir full and happy.

Today I told people at work what I'd done. One or two said 'oh how lovely!' But the majority were horrified- 'REALLY?!' 'I could never do that!' One chap made a sympathetic face and said 'Could you not find anyone to go with you?'

This attitude confuses me and pisses me off. As an adult, why is it abnormal for me to go and eat dinner on my own if I'm hungry? Why should I need or want anyone else?

Just wondering if IABU and I am the weird one? Or do others do this and it's my colleagues who are BU?

YouTheCat Tue 18-Mar-14 22:00:31

I think it's sad they'd rather be hungry than have something nice to eat. So what you were on your own?

Guitargirl Tue 18-Mar-14 22:01:13


Your colleagues on the other hand seem like children.

sandyballs Tue 18-Mar-14 22:02:54

Sounds fab. I love eating out on my own occasionally.

SingSongSlummy Tue 18-Mar-14 22:03:04

Crazy colleagues! I have worked away from home a lot and rather enjoy a quiet solitary meal with my book!

TheSkiingGardener Tue 18-Mar-14 22:03:34

Exactly what I would do, it sounds great! I know lots of people that wouldn't countenance the idea of eating alone in a restaurant though. Apparently you spend the entire time in a miasma of shame and embarrassment. Can't say I've ever felt that but I think people do struggle with it.

Glad you enjoyed it, if I were you I'd be planning all the restaurants I could try each week.

Chippednailvarnish Tue 18-Mar-14 22:04:14

YANBU - I often had to do this when I travelled with work.

and I miss it!

Mintyy Tue 18-Mar-14 22:04:46

Your colleagues are the weird ones.

TwelveLeggedWalk Tue 18-Mar-14 22:04:59

God no, kindle + dim sum +cocktail minus children sounds like heaven to me.
If you wanted to be more sociable you could see if anyone in your choir was in the same boat, but frankly for one night a week I'd enjoy the peace and quiet!

PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 22:05:33

Yay, lots of solitary diners on the thread! And The SkiingGardener I have already had that thought- I'm thinking tapas and a nice glass of sangria next week grin

AgentProvocateur Tue 18-Mar-14 22:05:50

I love it if I'm away for work and I get to eat on my own with a book. YANBU

rookiemater Tue 18-Mar-14 22:06:43

YANBU - I quite like eating alone. I wouldn't go to a posh restaurant, but often go to Yo Sushi for lunch and quite happily pass the time watching the conveyor belt and the other people or we have a great veggie place which has lots of folks on their own.

Chloerose75 Tue 18-Mar-14 22:07:07

I would prefer to eat with others if going to a nice long chatty meal, of course, but if you just want something nice to eat and have a short gap to yourself to do it I don't see a problem with going it alone and at least having something nice, better than a macdonalds or something! I think the colleagues saying ooh I could never are the insecure ones.

PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 22:08:03

I suppose I could TwelveLeggedWalk but frankly, that would involve more effort than I'm willing to make smile
I have a very busy job in which I am constantly interacting with people and to be honest, I relish the peace and quiet.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks Tue 18-Mar-14 22:08:32

I used to love a café lunch on my own, a coffee and a hot beef sarnie with a book. Bliss!

PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 22:11:43

Interesting to see some responses making distinctions about where/when they would eat on their own. I wouldn't think twice about having a cafe lunch alone and have been doing so since I was at university. However, last night was my first actual restaurant dinner by myself. I can tell you though, it certainly won't be the last!

TwelveLeggedWalk Tue 18-Mar-14 22:12:22

God I really really want dim sum and a cocktail now. Is it a Ping Pong? Bloody countryside, not enough pan Asian cocktail bars in amongst the fields round here.

PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 22:13:45

YES a Ping Pong! I love Ping Pong. I want another one now- I could live off their roast pork puffs!

TwelveLeggedWalk Tue 18-Mar-14 22:14:36

Blocking this thread now, too upsetting grin

Lovecat Tue 18-Mar-14 22:14:49

I've had breakfast and lunch alone (in fact I had breakfast this morning in a cafe while DD was with her dyslexia tutor) but never dinner, for no reason I can think of.

As long as I had a book it wouldn't phase me. In fact cocktails and dim sum without anyone there to be stealing the spare char sui bun sounds wonderful... grin

MomOfTwoGirls2 Tue 18-Mar-14 22:17:24

Good on you OP. I eat alone on business trips, I enjoy a nice meal with a glass or two of red wine. I do bring a book of iPad to read between courses, and to enjoy with my wine.

I would totally eat on my own before my hobbie in your situation. Lucky you to have the time to do it!!

PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 22:17:38

Spare char sui bun Lovecat? I'm afraid you're confusing me- I've never heard of such a thing grin

CointreauVersial Tue 18-Mar-14 22:20:31

I'd do that, for sure. I have happy memories of dining alone while travelling on business; also as a student when I backpacked around the US I treated myself occasionally (and was fussed over and spoiled by waiters).

I have to have something to read, though.

PollyCazaletWannabe Tue 18-Mar-14 22:23:31

I did have a book but most of the time I just watched the world go by, as I asked for a window seat for that very purpose smile

SolidGoldBrass Tue 18-Mar-14 22:26:17

I do it quite a lot - or at least I used to as I travelled for business purposes a fair bit in the past.

The only reason I don't do it now is lack of money.

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