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to show this woman a copy of

(51 Posts)
DDDDDORA Sun 16-Feb-14 15:31:33

DD2 birth and baptism certificate to prove we named her xxxx and not xxxxx. DD2 started school in September and she made new friends, one of her friends mother insists on calling her the longer version of the name that we called her, despite me correcting her several times. It is really beginning to annoy me and what really gets me is that she tells DD2 off for not answering her when she calls her by it!

brokenhearted55a Sun 16-Feb-14 15:33:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sadbodyblue Sun 16-Feb-14 15:39:17

well I wouldn't allow her to tell dd off. I would say to dd in front of her something like 'oh isn't friends mum silly to think you would realise she was talking to you when that's not your name'

make a joke of it but be loud and direct. can you alter her name in any way or her dds?

pinkfluffypoodleface Sun 16-Feb-14 15:39:21

So do you mean that you called your dd Ann for example , and the mum is assuming its short for Annabel and calling her Annabel.

Don't show her the birth certificate , that's odd. Just keep correcting her loudly and every single time and don't stand by and let her tell your dd off without jumping in.

DDDDDORA Sun 16-Feb-14 15:39:59

Get a grip? If we wanted her to be called by the longer version then we would have named her that! I don't even like the longer version!

SummersDumbAsPie Sun 16-Feb-14 15:40:15

You need to have another word with her and make it clear that it's not dds name and you don't appreciate her calling her it. Or tell her you'll now be calling her daughter Fred and see how she finds that. It's not about getting a grip, it's annoying. It's so rude to call people by something that is not their name when you know their actual name.

Pumpkinpositive Sun 16-Feb-14 15:41:05

Surely the simplest approach is to tell DD2 to continue as is, and next time the woman pulls her up for not answering, say "I didn't think you were talking to me because that's not my name!"

Pagwatch Sun 16-Feb-14 15:41:39

Can we stop the 'get a grip' shit.

It's just dull and rude.

I would just kep correcting her and ask her about it in a 'why do you keep telling dd off when she is right and you are wrong?'

GoofyIsACow Sun 16-Feb-14 15:43:03

Yep, it is very annoying, you need to speak to her, especially about the telling off!

SomethingkindaOod Sun 16-Feb-14 15:44:05

YANBU
DS has a short verse of a longer name, it's on his birth certificate as the short version and I have been so tempted to do this in the past!
You'll have to get tough, next time she shouts at your DD get snitty with her and say something like 'she won't answer you because that isn't her name, it's never been her name and please stop trying to correct her. She is fully aware of her own name and if you use it she will answer'.
I sympathise, it's irritating.

magoria Sun 16-Feb-14 15:44:32

What is wrong with bluntly telling this woman that your DD is not called x and do not tell her off for not responding to not her name again?

Or start calling this woman y when you speak to her until she asks you why.

sadbodyblue Sun 16-Feb-14 15:44:40

she also sounds very thick skinned so you may need to really make sure that she is wrong and you do not want dd called by the wrong name.

very annoying and rude of her.

jump in straight away if she starts telling your dd off. cheeky cow!

Birdsgottafly Sun 16-Feb-14 15:45:00

I would address it with her, especially if she is telling your DD off.

I wouldn't talk through your child, or use Passive Agressive communication, it teaches children to fear confrontation, even if they are in the right and how not to communicate.

PissesGlitter Sun 16-Feb-14 15:45:40

Start calling her child by a different name and tell her off for not answering
When mum pulls you up tell her it's what she does, you will stop doing it when she does

I would also tell mum off for telling daughter off, that's just fucking rude

QuietNinjaTardis Sun 16-Feb-14 15:47:05

My friend at school was constantly called a longer version of her name by the French teacher. Her birth cert sas the short version same as your dd and she hated being called by the long version as it wasn't get name. The teacher stubbornly refused to ever get it right.

hokhoihioh Sun 16-Feb-14 15:52:28

I thought for a second you had the longer version of the name on the birth cert. But see you do not.

The woman is just plain rude. That is not her name. She needs to be told, bluntly too.

phantomnamechanger Sun 16-Feb-14 15:52:52

how different is the name? if its something like Isabelle/bella then maybe the mum has just misheard it? if she's calling her Kathryn when her name is only Katie then that's another matter and just TELL her "no, that is NOT DDs Name, her name is X"

nicename Sun 16-Feb-14 15:54:17

Maybe it's a term of endearment? I worked with a woman called 'lucifer' (not her real name).

I often get called the wrong name (long name, anything remotely similar with the same starting letter usually) but am so used to it, I'd even answer to 'seabiscuit' if called.

SoupDragon Sun 16-Feb-14 15:55:04

I agree with a previous poster. Simply start referring to her or her DD by a different name.

I think you have to be blunt - "Would you like to see dd's birth certificate, or will you once and for all accept that you are WRONG about her name? She knows that her name is xxxx NOT xxxxxx - please call her xxxx and don't tell her off for ignoring you when you call her the wrong name!"

Viviennemary Sun 16-Feb-14 15:58:05

I would tell this woman that x is your daughter's name and that is what she must call her. If she doesn't then I would start calling the woman by a totally different name. If she still doesn't get the message I would avoid her.

VeryStressedMum Sun 16-Feb-14 16:02:58

Omg the woman sounds like a total twat. It's like someone telling you several times your name is Ben only for you to keep calling them David. It doesn't matter that the name is the longer version of your dds name it's still the wrong name. Keep saying 'it's not her name' over and over, and say it so other parents can hear it too.

bootsycollins Sun 16-Feb-14 16:05:16

Start calling the woman Dennis.

Joysmum Sun 16-Feb-14 16:07:16

My daughter's name can be pronounced 2 ways depending on whether it's accented or not, hers isn't.

I made he confident in correcting people immediately if they got it wrong. Told her that if she didn't do so straight away then the person would be very embarrassed if they found out later and had done it lots of times, than if they were helped after only one time.

I'd empower your daughter to speak up and correct her too.

YouTheCat Sun 16-Feb-14 16:08:38

Bootsy, I was going to suggest 'Bernard'. grin

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