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That if someone comes to your house with some cakes/scones/biscuits that they leave them if there are only two left at the end

(76 Posts)
nocluemum Fri 23-Aug-13 19:14:39

And not take the two cakes home at the end of the morning like somebody did at my house this week. Ten people in my house and 2 cakes left at the end and the person took them home..... I would have left them as think that if someone is going to have a load of people at their house the least you can do is leave them a couple of cakes for later. What would you do.....

AmberLeaf Sun 25-Aug-13 09:32:43

Generally if I have taken a bottle of spirit to a party, I don't take it for everyone to drink

To add; because usually it is a 'bring what you're drinking' rather than 'bring a bottle'

AmberLeaf Sun 25-Aug-13 09:31:25

Someone mentioned cost; well if you afford to drink it you can afford to leave it behind, there's no logic there

If you can afford to drink, you can afford to pay for someone else to drink?

Generally if I have taken a bottle of spirit to a party, I don't take it for everyone to drink, especially when everyone else brings wine or beer then wants to drink my vodka.

A friend who is usually the host drinks vodka too, so I have no qualms sharing with her and would leave any leftovers with her.

Worst thing is pisstakers who bring cheap booze [beer etc] then drink spirits other people have paid for.

wrigglebum Sun 25-Aug-13 09:03:56

Was it homemade cake? I sort of understand if they needed to take the tin home, though the correct etiquette there would be to ask your host if they have another container you can put it into so you can take yours (or collect the tin from them later).

AaDB Sun 25-Aug-13 08:52:45

Bellini, it is the same mentality. we bring with us what we drink and a bit more to share. We don't take cheap versions with the intention to swap on better swag. Some people are selfish and machiavellian at getting what they want. We all go through tough times financially each other out. I can't abide cheap unkindness and miserly shenanigans.

The tin hat with the family was when we went out. The rest of us paid cash and left a tip. The father of this family put the money on his card but only paid the difference, effectively stealing the tip. One of their DC had created a massive mess. It was the tin hat.

MrsKoala Sun 25-Aug-13 07:15:18

Flogging - with the group of friends i was referring to it wouldn't be a big party, just 4-6 of us and yes everyone did just keep their booze with them in a carrier bag. I wouldn't do it at anyone elses. We all knew each other from primary school and it was the norm in that group.

I hate most drinks, so i fucking hate it when i go to a party and everyone else has brought red wine (which makes me vom) and i am the only one who has brought a bottle of white wine, but suddenly everyone fancies a glass of white. i have half a glass then have to drink water for the rest of the party. Or when you have a party and people bring beer but ask for wine.

Bellini28 Sat 24-Aug-13 23:54:33

Bloody hell reveal and AaDB do these people really exist!! No shame at all!! I just cannot stand the company of miserly people.

I have been on the receiving end of some rather nasty fizz though whilst noting our vintage offerings were swiftly stashed away. Same kind of thing and sort of funny... But ALWAYS duly noted wink

AaDB Sat 24-Aug-13 23:41:40

reveal, I understand where you are coming from. She sounds tighter than two coats of paint, you are right to take home your leftovers.

We had friends that our now acquaintances. They brought £1 Iceland own brand cake (totally fine). As I mentioned before, guests provide pudding and desserts for our group. They always ate all the nice cake and never their own. Basically they ate and drank like Henry the Eighth for £1. They also had excuses when it came to their turn to host. They aren't short of a Bob or two; just mean, unkind and lazy.

369thegoosedrankwine Sat 24-Aug-13 21:57:32

I would always leave whatever I take. I would never dream of taking either food or alcohol home with me, ever. It would just be rude IMO.

revealall Sat 24-Aug-13 21:56:27

Ah but I have a friend who invites people round but never buys enough food or booze to go around herself.
She'll invite you and then ask you to provide the snacks or wine and puddings and starters if it's a dinner party. So of course if you are designated pudding person you bring two varieties to keep all tastes happy and snack person will usually bring dips as well as crudites/crisps/nuts etc.
Friend then inevitably ends up with tons of everybody elses stuff at the end.That would be OK but it's every time and surprise she can never make it to anyone elses house. We've all started reclaiming at the end of the night now.

Bellini28 Sat 24-Aug-13 21:18:46

What the buggery!! I am sorry but this kind of thing makes me cringe. One does NOT leave a hosts home with booze, food or whatever unless it is handed out by said hosts on the way out. If you can't afford to leave it then dont take it..... Seriously poor form and utterly embarrassing as this stuff never goes unnoticed. Quite frankly my self respect and reputation are worth far more than the cost of some wine or cake!

AaDB Sat 24-Aug-13 21:03:08

Cakes should be left.

Chocolates or gifts should not be opened by visitors or their children.

Booze brought as a hostess gift should be left.

I have lovely friends and we visit each others houses often. The unspoken protocol had morphed into hosts provided drinks, nibbles and main meals. Guests bring wine, cake and small doodah for each of the kiddos. The group is much smaller than it once was. Geggers and tight arsed have fallen by the wayside. No time for unkindness here.

We do have weekend guests that bring wine and take it home, even after consuming vast amounts of our provisions. I think it's rude but see others see this as acceptable. doesn't everyone know you take gifts to hosts?

Lweji Sat 24-Aug-13 20:42:07

Thank god, chocolate. grin

Stripedmum Sat 24-Aug-13 20:36:22


chocolateicecream Sat 24-Aug-13 19:23:09

Oh I did Lweji. That thread has been pure entertainment.

Bumblequeen Sat 24-Aug-13 19:16:01

How tight. I would only take an item home if guest insisted I do because they do not/cannot eat or drink it.

Some people are just out for themselves. It is always about their gain.

I had a friend who was very stringent. I found it annoying doing anything with her. If we went to the cinema she would refuse to buy snacks but take a few of mine when offered. If we had lunch she would buy a mains but no side and ask for 'a few' of my chips. She constantly watched her pocket. She earned more than me at the time as I was a pt student!

Silverfoxballs Sat 24-Aug-13 19:03:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lweji Sat 24-Aug-13 19:02:15

It depends, I mentioned taking part of large cakes because usually there's so much left that people tend to divide up remaining food, particularly cakes. And then I take them to be eaten at work.

(sad that no one picked up on the 3 day cupcakes sad - see cakes thread)

nocluemum Sat 24-Aug-13 18:49:58

Liking the £1.03 comment coffeeone. We could be talking about the same person!! Although I think there are probably a lot of people out there like that sad

Thepowerof3 Sat 24-Aug-13 15:50:02

If you're going to take stuff home you may as well turn up empty handed

sleeplessbunny Sat 24-Aug-13 12:37:48

I do think it's a bit rude to take stuff home, but not half as rude as turning up empty-handed.

RoastedCouchPotatoes Sat 24-Aug-13 12:34:30

I leave it, unless the host specifically asks.

GwendolineMaryLacey Sat 24-Aug-13 12:28:16

I'd never take stuff home unless absolutely pressed by my host (diet/cake etc). I'd never take alcohol either. Once it's handed over it's theirs.

pumpkinsweetie Sat 24-Aug-13 12:26:18

Very stingey behaviour, i would personally leave them!

saulaboutme Sat 24-Aug-13 12:23:08

Crowler...I was gobsmacked, I thought well why did you bother...

Crowler Sat 24-Aug-13 12:13:47

^^Horrible, saulaboutme.

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