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M&S staff inappropriate about my post pregnancy size

(86 Posts)
Onthebuses Fri 19-Jul-13 21:59:05

Looking for new summer clothes in branch of m&s, carrying my 10 week old son, hot and uncomfortable as still having to wear pregnancy clothes as last summers clothes don't fit. I ask a sales person where the shorts are, she explains they are now selling autumn clothes, adds there are a few shorts left over the other side of the store

Then touches my hip and says but I don't think they would be in your size!!!

Taken aback I leave the store and email a letter of complaint for a) inappropriate touching and b) her making a snide judgement about my size

V standard response from complaints/brush off.

Not on??

Fakebook Fri 19-Jul-13 23:01:23

^ I've never had M&S down as being sizeist*

hmm. What? Because a few individuals that happen to work in M&S made some comments about size in a shop that predominantly sells clothes? Right.

WorraLiberty Fri 19-Jul-13 23:02:13

I think this is possibly the downside to emails

People can now instantly complain at the touch of a few buttons and fire off an angry email before they've had time to stop and think it through/calm down.

When we had to use Royal Mail, by the time you'd written a letter, found the head office address, dug out an envelope, bought a stamp and remembered to post it the next time you pass a postbox...a lot of people would have got over it or moved on.

I expect there were a much higher number of complaints with substance back then.

WorraLiberty Fri 19-Jul-13 23:03:28

YANBU. Would OP be unreasonable about that if it was a man that had touched her hip? I would be annoyed at that too.

Or a dog or a kangaroo or Buzz Lightyear

brettgirl2 Fri 19-Jul-13 23:06:26

I bet she meant they had a 6 or 22. Ie no normal sizes that would fit me either.

MalcolmTuckersMum Fri 19-Jul-13 23:10:24

<<<arfs loudly>>> @ worra

To obesity...............and beyyoooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd!


cantreachmytoes Fri 19-Jul-13 23:10:26

I don't think YABU. I also think it's possible that the assistant may have been trying to be helpful, but a far more tactful way of saying it would have been, "We're nearing the end of the sales, only the very small and large sizes are left I think." (assuming you're in the middle category).

And no touch on the hip! A touch on the upper arm, if she had to, but who touches a customer's hip?!


cantreachmytoes Fri 19-Jul-13 23:11:00

Lol- not sure where that stray "everyone" appeared from!

WorraLiberty Fri 19-Jul-13 23:11:40

Malcolm!! grin

AmyFarrahFowlerCooper Fri 19-Jul-13 23:11:54

Meh, make fun of what I say all you want worra, of OP had posted about a male sales person doing this, responses would be considerably different.

AmyFarrahFowlerCooper Fri 19-Jul-13 23:12:10


K8Middleton Fri 19-Jul-13 23:12:56

I spy Worzel Gommidge! straw man

Snoot Fri 19-Jul-13 23:16:02

A big fat YANBU!!! Sales assistants should be kind, helpful and, if the occasion demands it, tactful. You can tell she wasn't on commission. Having just had a baby you are bound to be feeling sensitive but then so are a lot of women, especially about their body size, a lot of the time and especially in hot weather, looking for shorts. She has a lot to learn about her craft and that is her problem, not your's, beautiful, clever, lucky new-mummy OP.

BTW the shorts I tried on in M&S were very strangely cut so as to give me a massive camel-toe even two sizes up with big, poofy, pocket-hip pouches. Try BHS, I know it's a bit naff but I'm currently extremely comfortable in the linen number I found therein. Congratulations on your baby smile x

Onthebuses Fri 19-Jul-13 23:18:56

BHS - excellent. Thanks for the short tip.
Camel toe - woe - who test drives their clothes?

Snoot Fri 19-Jul-13 23:40:27

I wonder? Made me feel I may have freakishly plump labia! Who needs to add to their body paranoia? M&S ladies have twice made me feel terrible, once over a bra, "have you tried this on?!?" and once over their sandals which broke, stating that my foot was probably too wide! Now I vary between a 12 & a 16 but I'm not huge!

ENormaSnob Fri 19-Jul-13 23:41:05


The comments would have pissed me off a bit but not as much as the hip touching tbh.

Would rather my arse cheeks were groped than my hips.

thebody Fri 19-Jul-13 23:41:57

oh get lost.. can't believe this.

WhistlingNun Fri 19-Jul-13 23:45:55

I touch people a lot when i'm talking to them - particularly strangers. No idea why!

E.g. I was in a shop today and asked a lady to go and check stock for something. She came back and said she'd completely forgotten what i'd said, could i repeat. We both shared a laugh. I touched her arm and said 'Don't worry, i'd forget my own head if it wasn't screwed on' (or something naff like that).

So maybe the hip touching was unrelated to what she was saying?

perplexedpirate Fri 19-Jul-13 23:47:01

YANBU. If she did mean there were only silly sizes left, she could have worded it so much better.
Way to make you feel bad saleswoman.

EstelleGetty Fri 19-Jul-13 23:50:24

I think it's fucking ridiculous that anyone is insinuating you are being unreasonable. Customer service training is expensive for any retail business. I have been through it many times myself. I would never ever have been taught that touching a customer or making any comment which would be perceived as remotely personal would be acceptable. YANBU. I would complain.

GentlyGentlyOhDear Fri 19-Jul-13 23:58:53

It sounds quite tactless and unprofessional.

waltermittymissus Sat 20-Jul-13 00:04:13

You're projecting.

You seem sensitive about your current weight and taking it out on this random sales assistant.

Amy106 Sat 20-Jul-13 07:07:33

No way she should have touched you or make you feel bad. Sounds like she needs work on her customer service skills.

flowery Sat 20-Jul-13 07:11:12

How is saying there are none left in your size sizeist? confused

rainbowbrite1980 Sat 20-Jul-13 20:56:04

YANBU. It's completely inappropriate, and complaints people should have spoken to the member of staff.

Wuxiapian Sat 20-Jul-13 21:00:31

I think YABU and a little over-sensitive.

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