that sometimes I just don't want another lecture on what's bad for us and why?

[amazingmumof6]

or what I should do to be healtier, happier, smarter etc?

never mind media scaremongering, but my MIL just does my head in

her latest gem is: vaccines are stored in mercury so DD, who's just had MMR and is poorly, should have a bath with bicarb of soda to flush the toxins out!

No, just NOOOOOOOO!

even if any of that is/would be true I don't want a fucking lecture! I'm exhausted and was not asking for advice!
why can't she just say "yes, staying up till for with a feverish whimpering baby sucks"
AIBU? am I?

[amazingmumof6]

• till four.
  
  can't spell, too tired

[HollyBerryBush]

How is bathing going to flush the toxins out?

[amazingmumof6]

Exactly! I just wanna say to her SHUT UP!

[PodgyTumWellies]

YANBU.

My DM was in tears tears last week when she stayed with us because apparently non-stick pans are carcinogenic and she loves my DCs so much and is just worried about them.

FFS FFS FFS.

[and breathe]

[looseleaf]

At least it sounds well meant if that's any consolation; but yes she should be sensitive enough to realise you're not interested

[MrsGeologist]

Christ, and I thought I had it bad with, 'the DCs have a sniffle! Quick! Take them to the doctor for antibiotics!'

Telling them ABs do nothing for a cold is about as effective as talking to a brick wall.

[amazingmumof6]

that's the sort of crap I'm talking about!

that one of DC might have leukaemia because he's pale and his knees hurt

that DH hernia might get better if he uses some magic cream ( created by her friend who knows every-fucking-thing)

oh and taking bicarb would cure SIL's occasional jawlock that's caused by her overbite (been 20 years + she's had this problem)

ffs!

[amazingmumof6]

oh no, antibiotics are the devil dontcha know?!

[NumTumDeDum]

Bloody hell! There are other women like dp's mother? This is a revelation to me. In all other respects she's marvellous. Except when she is imparting wisdom. It drives me mad. She's read the sunday papers by 9 am and on the phone by 9.15 imparting the bits she thinks are useful. She posted me a cut out article about sex in marriage a few months ago. I know she means well. But my god there are days when I could literally scream - 'because, just fucking because ok' when asked why I don't do x y or z. So no YABU. I like help and advice, it's often great and useful. But please, wait to be asked. Don't assume I don't know and am acting only in ignorance.

[NumTumDeDum]

YANBU not YABU. Oh ffs. It's been a long morning.

[PodgyTumWellies]

Oh, and poor DS aged 3 got a D&V bug. So what does DM do, when I am out of the fucking house for ten minutes? Feeds him an apple as she was so 'worried about dehydration'. Much too acidic for his tum and of course he throws it up everywhere.

[still breathing deeply]

[PodgyTumWellies]

it is good to get that off my chest.

um... what else?

[amazingmumof6]

worst even that she gets obsessed with whatever and is trying to force it on you passive-aggressive style.

she was going on abou a health book a few years ago, but I said I wasn't interested.
gave her used copy to DH (just in case!) then me a new copy of the bloody book for my birthday!
and it doesn't stop there, a year later I was given another copy. as a birthday present!

and to top it all she adopts a new pet hate or pet love roughly every 3-6 months.
It's a never ending circle of being excited-obsessed- must buy all related gimmicks-loosing interest- noticing shiney new crap-excited... ( and repeat ad infinitum)

I really love her, but I'm running out of patience

[MrsTerryPratchett]

I know someone who got mercury poisoning and is being treated for it (very long treatment and recovery). I must tell her it will magically go away if she has a bath in bicarb. She will love me forever. Not.

[amazingmumof6]

oh and she's convinced that suncream is full of toxins/poisons and could make you blind.
when I ask her to reapply it on kids while she is with them she looks sheepish, so I just don't trust she will.

I asked her if she preferred them getting a heat rash / being sunburnt / being in danger of getting skin cancer.

her "answer" was : well you are their mother...

[HerrenaHarridan]

I live the bath in bicarb!

Not mum/ mil but when I was pregnant someone u had always taken to be a reasonably intelligent, thinking individual told me, in all seriousness, that I shouldn't eat strawberries as the baby would be a strawberry birth mark!

Go figure!

[HerrenaHarridan]

Love, love not live.

[Featherbag]

My DGM last week on seeing scab on DS's forehead from falling over and bashing his head on the mat - 'did you take him to get checked out?' Me - 'why would I do that for a simple superficial head wound?'
'Well, he might have a concussion, they would've scanned his head'
'Why on earth would they do that? And besides, I AM 'they!' (I'm an A&E nurse)
'But he should've at least had an x-ray and been checked out PROPERLY!'
'He WAS checked out properly, by a qualified healthcare professional. His mother.'
'Well I think that's wrong. You should've taken him, anything could've happened'
'Stop reading the Daily Mail nana.'

[SixPackWellies]

I love that. 'I AM 'they''!

[StealthOfficialCrispTester]

You must be able to find a book that tells her that buying a holiday in the sun for your nearest and dearest each year is the best way to a long, happy and healthy life for you all?
No? I'll write one, quick. Look out for it on Amazon in the autumn. You're welcome - you know how to thank me :o

[RedToothBrush]

Come up with your own ridiculous 'gems' of made up medical wisdom to give to her about her health.

[PinkyCheesy]

I had DS referred (CAF) to family worker so we could talk about behavioral issues.
MIL said "you shouldn't do that, he'll have a label and be on a file forever, it'll hinder his chances at a good uni or a good job"

I replied "it'll hinder him a lot more if he gets a police caution at 15 for violent behaviour which I could have sorted out now"!
DS is 9

[hackmum]

How exactly is the bicarb bath going to "flush" the toxins out? I mean, it doesn't even begin to make any sense.

I have friends/relatives like this and it drives me mental.

[amazingmumof6]

hackmum what do these friends of yours say?

MIL was also covinced that fresh air and sun helps wounds to heal.
she sunbathed her hernia scar to aid healing.
surprise surprise it got sunburt and VERY sore. honestly.....

[tangstar]

YANBU. There's enough guilt with a new baby anyway!

My SIL gets really into some small area of nutrition or alternative medicine and talks about nothing else then moves onto a different one. She's lovely and well-meaning, but the whole family is sick of her bugging them. When DS was a baby he had awful colic and she would be on the phone for 30 minutes listening to me trying to shuggle him around while he cried, telling me that he would definitely stop crying if I just rubbed some almond oil onto the soles of his feet. Just what I needed to make me feel like an even worse mother - my choice of remedy was going for another walk as the crying didn't sound so loud outside