Long story I?m afraid so bear with me ? probably just need to get it off my chest tbh. Had been ?best friends? with this girl for about 6 or 7 years. She?s always been quite emotional and needy but on the flip side was very generous with her time and emotions and very supportive during a lot of crises ? which was reciprocated by me. About 3 years ago she and her boyfriend broke up and she accused me of having an affair with him. This was not true. I had become friendly with him and he had become quite overfriendly with me, to the point of texting me and asking me out for drinks etc. Nothing ever happened with him; I was not attracted to him and although he pursued me quite vigorously, it never came to anything. The pursuing happened after he had broken up with her and although I have to admit I was flattered by the attention, I never ever let anything happen. She refused to believe this because a mutual friend of her and her ex stirred things up, saying that something had. We spent a few months not talking, but eventually had a big conversation about it and moved on. Fast forward to a year or so ago. I became unexpectedly pregnant. From the moment I told her about it, she became distant and unresponsive. Later she blamed this on me, saying that I blew hot and cold throughout our entire friendship which she was constantly forgiving me for, and that I was not supportive of her when she was moving house, which happened to coincide with me discovering my pregnancy. This culminated in some pretty horrific text messages from her telling me that I was full of poison, she?d never trusted me and to fuck off out of her life. I was 2 months pregnant, very sick and full of hormones. You can imagine how this made me feel. Luckily I had a wonderful supportive DP (now DH) but because of this girl, ended up with no friends as she pretty much guilt tripped most of our mutual friends into no longer being friendly with me. A few months ago another mutual friend started talking to me again and admitted that they had both been jealous of my pregnancy and that was probably the reason this girl was being like she was. I have seen the girl on a number of occasions since all this happened and she has completely ignored me, to the point where both my DH and I have said hello very politely and she has literally turned her back on us. The last time this happened was this past weekend, and I confronted her about it, saying ?Seriously, are you not even going to say hello?? It took me several tries before she even acknowledged it, upon which she whirled on me and snapped, ?When you can admit what you?ve done and apologise for it, then we?ll talk.? And stomped off. She has it in her head that all those years ago I did something with this exboyfriend of hers (who is now married to someone completely different) and that I need to face up to it and apologise. How can I apologise for something I haven?t done? I accept that our friendship is over but don?t understand why she can?t at least be civil and acknowledge me. AIBU to expect her to do this? So sorry this is so long, but thanks for reading this far! Also, please be gentle as this is my first AIBU post.
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AIBU?
AIBU to think I am just wasting my time, energy and emotion with this girl?
62 replies
SayCoolNowSayWhip · 31/08/2011 10:34
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