...to post rotten fish to my neighbour?

[MackerelOfFact]

Well, not exactly to them. I would address the package to a fictional person and then leave it in the communal hallway for whomever it is in out building who opens all the parcels and disregards them if it's something boring (they don't like books) or pockets it if it's something valuable (such as a mobile phone or a delivery of sports equipment).

I have some lovely smelly past-their-best whole seabass which it would be a shame to waste...

[DogsBestFriend]

Please do, with my blessing. :) YAdamnNBU.

[aliceliddell]

Where do you get that 'smart water' (is that what it's called?) that Securicor etc use?

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Exploding dye pack

[LittleMissFlustered]

Ask your landlord to install separate mailboxes and/or CCTV. And post the fish in the meantime. In an old phone box if you can get your mitts on one:o

[AuntieMonica]

certainly NOT BU at all


i sent a letter to the person who opened all the mail in my sister's building once (addressed as normal, to my sister) ...funny nothing was touched after that

[PregolaLola]

or just exploding pack.....

[MackerelOfFact]

Our landlord did install seperate mailboxes, but didn't seal up the main letterbox so everything still gets posted through that anyway. Not even signed for mail is safe as our lovely mail thief just looks at the name on the parcel and signs that name on the electronic signy thing!

I get most things delivered to work now but I'm still bitter.

[PregolaLola]

address it to Miss Preeva-sea Pleeze

[MackerelOfFact]

[MrsTerryPratchett]

DH says that you can use an airbag from a car and dye... He said poo but I can't condone that!

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Watch Speed. Dennis Hopper gets one in the face (also Keanu has a nice bottom).

[joric]

I like exploding dye idea - make sure it won't wash off for a good few weeks!

[LittleMissFlustered]

Midnight jolly to the front door with a hammer, nails and a tube of loctite then :o

[MumGoneCrazy]

stick some wires to an alarm clock with a note attached saying this bomb will self destruct in 10 seconds

[BakeliteBelle]

buy a cctv device and just catch the bastard. Not before playing it back to them on a DVD that you post to their address

[SenoritaViva]

what a tosser! I have some disgusting smelling fish packaging that it making me wretch, I can post it to you. Only thing is, if you use something foul smelling won't the hallway then smell and everyone will suffer. Ink much better as hopefully the tosser can be identified from ink on their hands plus some of their clothes will be ruined.

I've always thought the worst thing I could be sent in the post would be dog poo. Utterly foul.

[Sidge]

Wot BakeliteBelle said.

It's theft innit?

[MissVerinder]

Can't you get that powder stuff that turns your hands blue for like, two weeks? It was on Byker Grove once...

www.maxmax.com/aPowderAnti-Theft.htm

[Stars82]

love the dye ideas....

invest in the invisble dye that ''old school'' companies used to use to catch thieves... not experienced it myself but have witnessed a thief come a cropper using this method....and it looks like its a right bitch to get off...hence being able to catch them :)

put it on something, wrap it loosley in tissue paper, and let them open it to investigate....dye all over hands....thief caught and publicly embarassed :)

Good Luck

[Stars82]

sorry just realised that MissVerinder posted that idea...great minds and all that :)

[TheMagnificentBathykolpian]

Or you could post a package and wrap it nicely and put a small box inside a bigger box and inside the small box have a piece of paper that reads

"FUCK YOU YOU THIEVING BASTARD. KEEP YOUR SKANKY HANDS OFF OTHER PEOPLE'S THINGS. YOU NASTY SACK OF SHIT!"

or something like that.

[Stars82]

LOVE IT.........

Or you could post a package and wrap it nicely and put a small box inside a bigger box and inside the small box have a piece of paper that reads

"FUCK YOU YOU THIEVING BASTARD. KEEP YOUR SKANKY HANDS OFF OTHER PEOPLE'S THINGS. YOU NASTY SACK OF SHIT!"

or something like that.

[joric]

Let's go all Enid Blyton and use itching powder!

[InnocentRedhead]

OMG i am loving this suggestions... I would just suggest a turd, fresh as you like, but then again... that would just be plain nasty ;)

[ILoveYouToo]

Another vote for the dye here; catch the thieving sod.

Make sure you put HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! with some coloured doodles on the parcel so it's really enticing!