Please please don't have a go, I would like some support so if you can't do that please don't comment...
We are on day 6 of LO being with us. He is great, sleeps for 11 hours a night, has a morning and afternoon nap, and is generally a happy baby. I feel lucky to have him, and want to look after him and love him.
But that's the issue, I worry that I won't ever 'love' him, I want to protect him but I'm struggling with the 'maternal' instinct.... I see friends with their kids, and read on forums about how other people love their kids from day one (adopted and birth) and worry that I just don't have that.....and that I won't ever get it....
I feel tearful every other day, I'll be fine one day but the next feel that I can't do it, that I won't be able to cope on my own (my OH is off work for 6 months now but has things coming up, like a stag weekend in June).
I feel awful and embarrassed about how I feel, that I've wanted this for so long, have got an amazing little boy, yet seem so ungrateful.
My OH has been great, very patient and is taking on a lot of the childcare when I feel like this. I then feel bad for him.
My friends have been great, I have been messaging them with how I feel and they say it's normal (I get now why having the support network is so important in this process), but I don't know how to 'fix' how I feel. Will it come with time? Do I need to be more hands on? Or should I take a back seat a little, observe my OH but still be there in the room etc?
Is this feeling normal, as right now I feel totally overwhelmed and that I can't do it and am a total ungrateful monster...
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Day 6 in placement and I feel like a monster....
44 replies
howmanyusernames · 26/04/2018 13:39
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