I'm sorry that I'm starting lots of threads this week. I've been in my lecturing job for nearly a year so I'm coming up the review and thinking about how it's going.
One thing I'm struggling with is having empathy/sympathy/compassion for students. I wasn't expecting this part of the job if I'm honest. I've had no training in the pastoral side of my job yet I seem to have students regularly constantly expecting "emotional labour" from me. This week I had a student crying in my office over how hard a year she's had and how this is catching up with her deadlines approaching. Another student came to see me to ask for advice about her friend being sexually assaulted.
A colleague asdivsed me not to internalise their issues but I'm kind of having the opposite problem. Without wishing to sound crass and terrible and unkind, I don't really care and I don't really see it as my job to support the students with their personal and emotional issues.
That sounds crass and I don't mean it to sound that harsh. Of course I want my students to be happy and healthy and I'm happy to point them in the direction of support services but I feel as though it's crossing a line when they start crying and/or telling me their personal issues.
When they're seeking extensions to deadlines, I get why they'd say what's going on for them and this may cause them to get upset (though having said that, they should be going through the Chair of Examiners, not module leaders or individuals). But they're not always seeking extensions, it's as though they just see it as part of my job to be a listening ear for their unloading. But I don't really see this is part of my job.
Does anyone else find this?
How do you deal with this stuff?
I think part of the problem is that I'm very open and friendly with students but I don't know how to change that as that's the kind of person I am and I also find this pedagogically much more effective.
Sorry this is really long and I sound like a total cow!
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Empathy/sympathy/compassion for students
69 replies
ZeroFucks · 14/02/2020 14:49
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