Hi everyone, I wondered if I could ask the thoughts of the Mumsnet community on a sensitive issue regarding personal / medical privacy. Around 1 year ago my wife and I suffered through a positive NIPT and then scan confirming severe chromosomal abnormalities 12 weeks into our pregnancy, followed by an extremely upsetting medical termination. We are still dealing with this loss and its associated sadness with the help of a professional counsellor. My wife is a private person and has chosen to share this information only with a counsellor, family, and close friends.
Last week during baby loss awareness week we received through our letterbox a handwritten note from one of our next-door neighbours commiserating my wife on her loss and explaining in some detail our neighbour’s past fertility problems (she now has two small children). This neighbour, who is not a friend (we only very occasionally see her and say hello) works part-time as a receptionist at our local surgery. Earlier this year, for a number of reasons including the fact that our neighbour may view our confidential medical records, my wife decided to move to another nearby surgery. This neighbour had clearly accessed my wife’s (or my?) medical records, presumably has shared the information with her partner and mother (with whom she lives for now), and then decided to write my wife the message.
My first reaction was shock that a stranger could access and share what I would consider to be the most intimate and private medical information. Surely this is in breach of surgery rules, medical confidentiality, or even the law, especially given GDPR? A friend we have shared this with is of the opinion that it constitutes a sackable offence. At the time, my wife was also shocked (and upset) but perhaps more forgiving and so wrote a brief note thanking her for her concern and thoughts. Obviously, it would be very difficult to be on bad terms with our immediate neighbour. I can imagine them taking offense quite easily. In recent days and thinking about it more my wife has been very upset at the breach of privacy, at the reminder of our upsetting experience, her uninvited unburdening, at the thought that our near-neighbour nosed through our records without our permission, and at the fact that although the note was thoughtful in a way, was actually far more about our neighbour and about her difficulties. Perhaps it was a way for her to process her own experiences?
We’re wondering what next steps to take and would be interested in thoughts. Has anyone had a similar experience? Can anyone advise on the legal position here? My wife and I have discussed it at length and my wife feels that it would be too upsetting to bring it up herself. Neither of us would want our neighbour to lose her job, however surely I should bring this up with the practice to ensure that safeguarding procedures are in place, that medical information is confidential and kept confidential, and that this would not happen again? I have decided to leave the practise myself. I’m also thinking of raising it with the neighbour, though that will be a difficult conversation. Should we leave it and put her mistake down to the foolishness of youth? I’d be interested in everyone else’s thoughts.
Thankyou
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Gross invasion of personal privacy by neighbour
155 replies
gldd · 19/10/2020 20:58
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