Dreaming, I think you and I are thinking along the same lines. It's a red herring to throw the morality card in. It would be no different than accusing folks who are concerned about the drugs trade of just being "no fun" or those unhappy with the ethics of the diamond industry as "jealous of rich people."
My concern comes from knowledge of people - mostly women, being exploited and abused in the creation of porn, the messages about violence against women depicted in most mainstream porn which serves to normalise such actions in "real life," and the impact of increasingly explicit, misogynist and violent porn on young people who consume it at a far younger age than ever, and more frequently than would have been the case even 10 years ago. I work with kids and I've seen with my own eyes and heard with my own ears how porn has affected their emerging understanding of sex, sexuality and expectations of what happens in relationships.
I know we are discussing so-called "ethical" porn, or at least content that "looks" like it's ethical and whether it's okay to use this. I can't accept that one can be 100% certain that content is consensual, no matter how amateur it looks or how "happy" the participants appear. It's also not possible to be sure that even if what you are watching here and now is "ethical," that no one involved in making or distributing it hasn't been involved in some way in making and distributing porn that is not ethical.
That "non-ethical" porn that tops up their wallets that not-very-profitable ethical porn can't fill IS something that most likely involves abuse and exploitation of women. It will include products with far from "vanilla" content will give the impression that women like being beaten, raped, forced to eat their own faeces, etc. It will also include materials that will be viewed by small children - giving boys the impression that to be a man, you should be dominant and in control when you have sex, that male pleasure is the only important thing, that getting off on a woman suffering is good, that gang raping is manly, etc. Some girls will see it, too (or be told about it by boys), and believe sexual pleasure is something boys get and girls have to give, however they want it and with whomever they want you to do it (their mates, their bother, etc.) They'll learn that if it hurts or makes you feel uneasy, that's too bad. That's just what you have to do if you're a girl.
Okay, maybe I wouldn't feel so passionately about this issue myself if I didn't encounter the results of porn use in my work every day with kids. In the same way, it's not too difficult to have a toke of weed without thinking of the ethics, or admire your shiny ring without thinking about it's journey to your finger. We all face ethical dilemmas and we all have to make choices we feel comfortable with.