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if you were fat for years then lost weight, where did your motivation come from?

46 replies

DancingDuck · 03/01/2016 11:04

My problem is motivation. I have none. I know I am fat. My clothes are uncomfortable. I look colossal in photos. I've never dieted for longer than about five or six days, Most diets I think I'll try last half a day or less. Don't really trust myself to have the self discipline or stamina. I hate feeling hungry and get so grumpy about it. generally I eat quite healthily but the portions are too large (I'm short but DSs and DH are beanpole men and eat vast amounts. I match them. Hmm With snacks on top and a glass of wine every day, I am way over on calorie intake every day.

How did you gain motivation if you had none before? What tricks did you use to stay motivated?

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AlwaysBeYourself · 09/01/2016 03:10

Health. Realising that everything I eat is either going to nourish my body and create new healthy cells or if it's not healthy food will not nourish my body and potentially cause disease. We are responsible for our health, no one else.

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gaggiagirl · 09/01/2016 03:31

I was in total denial about how large I was. I hadn't gotten weighed in over a year. My friend asked me to go to SW with her as moral support. Even then I thought I didn't need to be there. I was absolutely horrified when I stepped onto the scales, worse than I could have imagined, that was my shock into fixing it.

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tabulahrasa · 10/01/2016 10:41

I joined slimming world...I'd tried other stuff on and off, I suppose I'm a yoyo dieter really, I just never had enough willpower to stick to anything long enough to both lose and then stay there.

I don't want to have to constantly obsess about food to make sure I'm within what I'm allowed, or measure it or have milkshakes instead (yep tried that too). I don't want to have to cut out whole food groups completely or never ever have things with sugar in them and I don't want to have to make something seperate for just me at meal times.

I knew full well that any of those things would work, I just didn't have enough motivation to actually live like that.

I just want to be able to go, I'm hungry and eat something.

So really it was less about finding motivation and more about finding something that I could actually happily live with.

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DancingDuck · 16/01/2016 20:21

Wow! Just logged on after a while away and seen so much brilliant advice and encouragement from people. And such amazing wieght losses!

Thanks so much toffee and rasaay and everyone else with great advice.

Twoton - your description of yourself before you lost weight is how I'd describe myself too. In a real rut in all areas of life but wanting to get out of it.

Still not dieting properly, but am doing dry January (I don't drink much but that's still about 1000 fewer calories a week) and have been walking or jogging a couple of miles three times a week. (I know it's nowhere near enough but it's a start. Quite motivated to think that if I set my mind to it I could be the right weight by Easter!) Really, I'd always assumed it would take a year or more to get there.

Toffeeboffin You asked for a typical day's food:

Breakfast: 1/2 small pot of natural yoghurt with fresh blueberries, 40g unsweetened muesli and 3 teaspoons of mixed seeds. Coffee and tea both with semi skimmed milk. Glass of water

After run snack: other half of the pot of yoghurt.

Lunch - two slices of olive bread with half an avocado, endive leaves, a generous tablespoon of fat reduced humous, an apple and small bag of ready salted crisps. 5 olives. Water

4pm 3 pecan toffee shortcake biscuits. (About 100 cals each!) Tea

Dinner: Home made quorn vegetable chilli with mash, red cabbage and carrots. Water.

That is really typical. Healthy food but too much of it, plus a 4pm meltdown for high fat: either sugar or crisps. The only unusual thing is eating bread. I don't like bread much and normally don't bother with it. And luinch was a bit more than usual as I felt very hungry, maybe because of the run?

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toffeeboffin · 17/01/2016 00:33

Your diet sounds really good, Dancing, guessing you're veggie?

As you say cutting alcohol makes a huge difference. 1000 cals a week! And running, wow I wish I had the energy..

I know it's hard, sometimes I get annoyed at how quickly I can gain weight, if I have a bad week I gain two pounds so easily! Most of the time I just think the cake/wine or whatever I've eaten isn't actually worth the weight gain.

BUT knowledge is power!

Once you know how you put it on, you know how to get it off Grin

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FabFlo · 17/01/2016 01:26

Someone i knew insulted me online. They didn't think I would see it but it gave me the push I desperately needed.

That was in June last year. I have lost 5st 12lb since thanks to Slimming World.

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SeasonalVag · 17/01/2016 07:21

I broke a chair in a restaurant! Dealt with aplomb at the time but died inside.....a year later I was seven stone lighter

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JapanNextYear · 17/01/2016 07:35

Do something else at 4pm to break the habit. Go fo a 10 minute walk, or if you are at work, go see a colleague, if you normally gave milky tea then , have a herbal tea. Just do something different for one week rather than snackin, and break the habit.

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Thefitfatty · 17/01/2016 07:36

I got active, and was working out a lot and starting to feel really strong and fit. Unfortunately I saw a picture of myself in my bathing suit and realized all my hard work wasn't paying off in terms of looking fit.

I've done WW and a few other things in the past, and they always worked for initial weight loss, but cutting calories that much meant it was hard to maintain my workouts, and also (I've battled eating disorders through my 20's), counting/cutting calories brings out bad habits where I force myself to cut more and more and make it a competition. So I lose weight, but I don't keep it off once I try to go back to normal eating.

I decided to try low carb/high fat, and it's been working really well and I definitely think it's something I can do long term, especially as my performance in the gym as improved. I've lost 14 lbs in the last 8 weeks. 2 more stone to go.

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JapanNextYear · 17/01/2016 07:37

Ps. I gave 2 stone to lose too. My breaking point is snacking watching tea at night. Started exercise classes so I eat tea later and still feel full later.

Acknowledging 2 stone o/w was hard for me....

Easter it is then!

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QuiteLikely5 · 17/01/2016 07:48

I was constantly bloated and looked pregnant at any given time. I decided to go low carb, of course I knew it would help me lose weight but I was fed up of having a huge tummy and also feeling very uncomfortable after eating.

Low carb changed my life. I do still eat carbs now but not a lot of processed stuff.

It is hard to over eat on high fat/high protein foods as your brain doesn't find them addictive so there is no real pleasure from carrying on eating

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DancingDuck · 17/01/2016 10:02

Toffee I'm not veggie but love veggie food and often eat it. I live with DH (6 ft 2) and two beanpole teenage boys who all eat for England. I think I've just got into the habit of eating portions like theirs.

2 stone in 2 months is amazing Fit. I know so many low-carb advocates but I have gallstone problems so high fat high protein makes me ill really fast. I have to stick with complex carbs, low fat and low fat protein. It's one reason I eat loads of veg (which I love) But then... I end up eating crisps and biscuits which are high fat, so who am I kidding? They don't cause pain like fat without carbs do but they are still really bad for my condition.

7 stone in a year Seasonal? Nearly six stone in a few months Fab? people like you inspire and amaze me. That is phenomenal. Massive congratulations to you both. I hope you give yourselves loads of rewards and non food treats - new clothes etc to keep you motivated.

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DancingDuck · 17/01/2016 10:03

Japan that's a good idea. A quick walk for 10 mins at 4pm would probably do the trick.

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ShowMeTheWonder · 17/01/2016 10:24

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Babieseverywhere · 17/01/2016 11:14

Showmethewonder, I am like that. If I am happy and well I can lose weight (over 5 stone) but when I feel stressed, upset or ill I put it back on (three stones back on) :(

I love my soup maker...throw stock pot and and couple of hand full of chopped veg and 20 minutes later hot filling soup. I eat mine for lunch. I also cool the rest of the soup and store in soup cups in the fridge for future meals. Just 3 minutes in the microwave to reheat.

That might work for you Showme soup in the evening to keep you going until proper tea. Homemade soup is around 60 calories a cup.

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DancingDuck · 17/01/2016 13:46

Showme - sympathy! I had a non sleeper, with no more than an hour's sleep at a time. It really does break you down physically and emotionally. No wonder you comfort eat. My memory is of having lived on biscuits for a year because I just hadn't the time or energy for real food.

*Babies idea of soup for you is a good one. Even if you don't have time to make your own, get a good brand like Baxters, which has very few preservatives. Their lentil and veg soup contains three of your five a day in one serving, costs about 70p a can and would be really filling without triggering a binge. You could heat it in the microwave. Their minestrone is very low cal - about 140 oer can and feels like real food. Might be worth a go. (Should take my own advice! maybe I'll have soup at 4pm too.)

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ShowMeTheWonder · 17/01/2016 13:55

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Bookaholic · 21/01/2016 14:18

Coming back to this thread after misplacing it a while ago. As I said earlier, about 10 years ago I lost ~8 stone mainly via low carbing when I realised I didn't want to be the fat bird for the rest of my life.

I put about 6 stone back on, really because I stopped concentrating, I thought I'd cracked it and could eat sensibly without paying attention. The weight slipped back on.

Interestingly I read somewhere recently (no, I can't remember where) that people who are successful at losing weight and keeping it off have two things in common. One is that they eat more or less the same things at the same time every day, the other is that they weigh themselves every day.

I'm coming up on 2 stone lost this time around and both of those things are what works for me. Especially weighing every morning. Yes there are fluctuations but it does serve to keep me on track. If I only weighed myself every week I'd be a basket case. Since early November I've been losing pretty steadily 1Kg per week.

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drspouse · 21/01/2016 14:34

I was about 3-4 stone heavier about 10 years ago and have kept almost all of it off - only about half a stone keeps popping back. (14 stone down to 10/10.5 which is still marginally overweight for my height but basically healthy).

I don't eat the same things every day and I don't weigh myself every day!

I have been using a food diary method (most recently MFP) and I was initially motivated by pre-diabetes like quite a lot of people. My DH has diabetes and it's not a life sentence but he saw just how much sugar I ate in particular. And I had a clothes crisis (but I'd had one of those before).

I think I've succeeded by:
Not really changing what I ate, though less sugar (not on cereal, mainly low sugar jam, fewer cakes/sweets/biscuits, baking low sugar biscuits, halving the sugar in a lot of recipes, fruit for pudding).
Logging things and learning what a healthy portion size was.
Only ever aiming to lose 1/2lb per week.
Always logging exercise and eating all my exercise calories. Massive motivator.
I always cooked quite a lot so try to cook fancy main meals with not much fat, if I am in the mood for cooking, rather than baking sticky cakes.

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indigo88 · 21/01/2016 19:10

4pm dip affects me too. I have container of crunchy salad stuff - celery, peppers. Chomping my way through that satisfies the comfort eating - releasing the intensity of the day and then takes the edge off my appetite or desire for a large portion for my evening meal. It also feels good, l'm looking after myself with my five a day and comfort eating.

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ThatsNotMyHouseItIsTooClean · 21/01/2016 19:30

I'm short so top end for healthy BMI for me is 10st 4. Until I started working, I was always under this but crazy working hours and a work hard/play hard lifestyle led to me going up to 10st 8 for my mid 20s & just over 11st for my late 20s/early 30s.
After DC1 was born, I was over 13st. When she was about a year, I went to the GP about going back on the pill and she said "of course, as you're obese, your options are limited". Her matter of fact tone really annoyed me & I certainly home & whinged to a friend who is also a GP who said "well, it's true, you are. Are you going to do anything about it or just whine?". It was the real kick up the back side I needed.
I got back down to 11st, had DC2 and went back up to 13st post pregnancy and was 10st 7 on his second birthday & 10st on his third birthday. I had a blip last autumn which was compounded by Xmas and was back up at 11st but am gradually losing it
On which note, I should stop MNing & go for a run!

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