Mealtime meltdowns - 7 month old HELP HELP HELP

[Sallypoo]

Hi all,

I don't know what I'm doing wrong....

I've been weaning my DS, who is 7 months old today, for about 5 weeks. Started with baby rice, and then moved onto smooth purees of veg and fruit. He liked all this, but something has gone very wrong along the way I think.

We now only seem to be able to have a mealtime without a full blown screaming fit if we are out, usually with jars. I should point out that these successes have probably amount to only three good meals out and about.

We've changed highchair, this was def an issue as DS was slumped in a chair that was far to big for him. We bought a really nice Svan today at Kiddicare. Had lunch there, DS had a bit of a Hipp jar and some banana, not too mashed. He sat in a Svan at the cafe and was very happy.

Then, this afternoon, when we got home, DS ate rice cakes in his new Svan in the front room, looking very pleased with himself.

We moved the chair into the Dining Room for his dinner. He was OK to start with (he usually is). We offered him the same food (don't usually) as he had had at lunchtime and the meltdown began after about 5 mouthfuls of his Chicken Risotto. High pitch screaming, tears, throwing himself backwards, he was hysterical. The only way I could calm him down was to take him out of the chair and stop trying to offer food. It's awful to watch and I feel so bad.

I've tried feeding him on my or DH's lap, in another room, offering a different meal, finger food, lumps/no lumps, meat/no meat....

I'm at a loss. We've had the same happen at nearly every meal for at least a week in not a fortnight.... I don't know what I can change. Once we calm DS down and return him to playing in the front room he seems to forget the whole episode.

This is his routine:

6.30am - 7oz bottle - takes all
11.30am - lunch + water, before a 45 min sleep
2.00pm - 7oz bottle - takes all
5.00pm - dinner + water
7.00pm - 8oz bottle
10.00pm - 5oz dreamfeed, DS doesn't always take this, since introducing protein.
During the night, DS is still waking but I'm only offering water he wakes at about 4.30 - 5am but not fed until 6-6.30am

We did try offering breakfast, but have not had any luck with this at all, so have stopped for now.

Any ideas? I'm frightened of DS starting to think of mealtimes as an unhappy time.....

Thanks all

[wornoutwaitress]

8 oz sounds about right. up to 12 months ds had 4 8oz bottles, which then dropped down to 3.

[giddykipper]

Glad you've had a good day

[FeelingLucky]

Good for you ,SallyPoo.
Lots of advice here - some conflicting - so glad you weren't confused by it all and had confidence to go with what you think is best. I remember so well the tears (both mine and DD's) when we had the mealtime meltdowns, so am very happy for you Fingers crossed it;s not temporary.

BTW - your roast veggies sound delicious.

[Sallypoo]

Hi all,

Well we've done three meals today. Breakfast wasn't good, but it never has been so I'm not worried.

However lunch and dinner have gone really well. DS has had about 125g of food at both plus finger foods. Hardly any tears. He started to get upset at dinner, so I left him to it and pretended to do the washing up. He then started to eat his finger food quite happily.

Thanks everyone. I do now beleive we were making him feel pressurised. I also think that teeth and heat have contributed. He's eaten as much today as he was a month ago which is a great relief. He did have quite a appetite.

He loved his new finger food. I've done roast carrot, sweat potato, potato, red peppers and courgette.

As for milk I'm going to up his bottles a little - back to 8oz from 7oz. He's not wanted as much milk as previously, but again I think that's probably due to the heat.

Thanks all, and good luck to everyone else with the weaning.

Fingers crossed we're back on track

SP

[lulumama]

your baby has not read the parenting books or websites

some babies will drink the amount they 'should', others hve a lot more

my 3 year old still has a pint a day

a 7 month old should have as much as they want IMO and IME

especially one who is waking in the night

water fills their small stomachs and is unecessary unless it is baking hot

a milk feed when he wakes is more beneficial IMO than water

at 7 months food is a compliment not a replacemetn to milk feeds

[wornoutwaitress]

It's what my gp said. 720ml-960ml between 6 and 12 months, then 470-720ml after 12 months. it's also what i've read on many parenting websites.

[Flightputsonahat]

I see
Sorry am thick at the moment..

I am just jealous because yours eats full jars of food! Mine only just did that.

[ruddynorah]

sally he's 7 months. it's really really common for babies not to eat much at this age. have you read my post from earlier?

sleep really has little to do with weaning. it's a shame to tie the two together as you can slip into trying to fill them up to sleep rather than introducing food as food itself iyswim.

[gingerninja]

Sallypoo, they do change their sleeping habit all the time. What happens today might not me repeated tomorrow. Every child is different and not every child sleeps 7-7 all the time.

I wouldn't imagine his sudden disinterest in food has anything to do with his wakings (but you could try a night time bottle to test if he's hungry) it's probably teeth or developmental change or just that his sleep patterns have shifted. Just try and take his lead. If he doesn't want to eat, don't push it and if he wants extra milk then give it to him. They're all guidlines not instructions. Some babies don't wean properly onto solids until much later.

The other thing is, why don't you dit down with him and eat? They mimic a lot at that age and he may enjoy copying what you're doing. Don't just leave him to it if he's likely to be distracted with you not being there.

[Sallypoo]

Thanks everyone,

Lots of different pointa of view.

Flightputsonahat, thanks for your input. I'm worried because a perfectly content baby with a healthy appetite, who was sleeping through the night, has seemingly lost his appetite, cries every mealtime and is getting up 3 times in the night!

FeelingLucky, yes I think the heat is at least playing a part - I did post on here a week or two ago about it but didn't get much response. Today is cooler which is great. Within 3 days of weaning, DS was sleeping though, this has now stopped. Was MNeters who told me to reduce milk intake! Which btw has only dropped by one bottle during the day, and an ounce of here and there elsewhere.

wornoutwaitress, every book I've read says at 6 months they need between 18 & 20oz of milk a day. Never seen more, certainly not 32oz. Where did you see this?

hollyandnoah, thanks. I too thought about teeth. He has been pulling at his ears and chewing more than usual. This might explain why some days are better than others.

UPDATE,
So this morning, he woke at 3, 4 & 5am. He was offered water at each waking. He went back to sleep at 3 & 4 but played from 5am. He was given his bottle at 6.20am.

He has a sleep, and then had breakfast in the kitchen after 8am. He was offered fingers of toast and banana and I left a bowl of half a weetabix & milk. |I left him to eat while I did 'things'. No crying, which is great. The toast was examined and got put in mouth, but that was it. Nothing eaten.

He then had a play & another sleep, as he was tired because of his early rise, and was offered lunch about 15 mins later. He had a jar (125g) and was offered banana as well which he didn't want either as finger food or off a spoon. There were tears, but no too many and he did finish a jar so not too bad.

He's now had his 2pm bottle, so dinner fast approaching....

I'm gonig to roast some veg for him to have with his dinner to at least give him something interesting to play with.

Thanks all,

[Annabellemary]

My 9 month old would normally eat loads and this past couple of weeks she has totally reduced her amount of food, sometimes having a tantrum if I do try to feed her etc.

Yesterday I made her a lovely lunch which she would not eat at all and when i took it to the sink to pour away/wash up my friend noticed that she was picking up food she had spilt onto her dress and eating it. I think that now she is obviously wanting to feed herself so I put grated cheese and tuna flakes onto her tray and she ate it all.

I was worried about her choking and I don't know what size is the right size for finger food etc. which is why I thought grated cheese and flaked tuna are nice small sizes.

Like you though I did think that perhaps the heat was playing a part.

Good Luck x

[hollyandnoah]

haha a sore mouth not a sore month

[hollyandnoah]

I thought about you last night. Maybe it's his teeth. ds has started pulling on his ears and being crabbier than usual. I'm guessing that he is teething.. Maybe your lo has a sore month?

[witchandchips]

it could also be that he is too tired and would be better eating at different times (so soon after sleeping rather than just before). This may make it easier for the two of you to eat together

What about

6.30 bottle
8 ish share a bit of breakfast with you
morning sleep
1 ish share lunch with you
Afternoon sleep
2.30 ish bottle
5ish dinner

[ruddynorah]

does he see you eat? like when you gave him banana and then left the room, maybe try eating with him. like sit eating a banana, and see if he grabs some.

same with your dinner. if you're having meat and veg or whatever, eat it as normal with him sat alongside. pass him some of it. not like presenting him with a full meal, just bits to play with. so whatever it is you're pureeing to spoon in, don't puree it just give as is.

it's a lot less frustrating and less pressure if you don't make special things for him. give him food you're having anyway.

ditto what someone else said about gag reflex. it sometimes looks like they're choking, but they're just learning how to control the food.

[ThatBigGermanPrison]

A pint and a half a day isn't necessary - they only need a pint and a pint is 20oz.

[wornoutwaitress]

ds at 2 years old only has 3 oz less than your 7 month old so i would say not enough milk either. up to a year old 32 oz is preferable. after a year about 25 oz.

[lulumama]

just had a quick read of your timetable and my first thought is that you are not giving enough milk!!

milk should be the main source of nutrition for the first year, with food as fun!

forget about water, especially at night , if he is waking in the night , he is hungry and needs milk. if he drains his bottles, then add an extra ounce

always offer milk before food and as long as he is having lots of milk no need to worry

[FeelingLucky]

could be the heat.
My dd (now 14 months) has been waking up at 5.30 (highly unusual for her). Only realised it was thirst when she started reaching out for her cup. She goes back to sleep after a drink of water.

Also, I'm not sure if upping intake of food helps sleeping through. Think that milk has more calories, so maybe he just needs more milk?

Hope breakfast goes well.

[Flightputsonahat]

Really puzzled that you are so worried, but I was worried about all sorts of thing when I had my first

Basically, they don't need lots of food at this age. 7 years old I'd be concerned but 7 months? Mine was barely having any food at all, just breastfeeds about 20 times a day

Just leave some things out for him maybe on the floor, he can pick them up, explore...maybe try spoon feeding once a day if you have a feeling he's hungry.

Please try not to get so worked up about it - that's the only thing that will make him think mealtimes are bad, if he knows mummy is stressed to the hilt.

He isn't going to starve.
In fact my 5yo practically lived on milk (bottles after we stopped bf) until the age of 2 and a half, he never did eat much.

[Sallypoo]

Thanks everyone,

I'm going to try toast, banana and weetabix this morning. All finger foods.

I know it sounds like DS is eating a lot, but the amount of solids has dropped a lot over the 5 weeks.

He was sleeping through. Now, he isn't. Last night for example he woke at 3, 4 and then was up from 5am.... I'm knackered. This is less sleep than I was getting when he was 3 months old.....

I know it's because he's hungry. So 3 weeks ago he would have the equicalent of 2 small jars of food twice a day, now its only once.

I let you know how the finger breakfast goes.

Could it be the heat?

Thanks

[hollyandnoah]

hey!

My ds was 7 mo yesterday! Happy new year eh!

I tried spoon feeding him in the begining but he was having none of it! Soo, i just ket him eat his own dinner now!

He gets what i am having ( not as much obv) on a plate in his Chicco Happy Snack high chair. He has a fork and spoon, but prefers his hands lol! I usually just feed him in his nappy because it can get quite messy! But he eats what he wants and knows when he is full and has had enough. He wont eat purees or jars now, infact he wont be spoon fed by anyone except my mum!

We're not in a set routine or that.. our days basically..

*Wakes up between 8 and 10
Has about 4 ounces of sma red.
*Breakfast or fruit and cerial or fruit and toast with some diluted juice.( an hour or so after he wakes)
*Nap of aboout 30 mins at about 12 - 1. the another 4 ounces of sma red.
*We play for a while, take dogs for a walk/ go shopping/ do day time bits, he usually has a biscuit or something in buggy.

• dinner about 5-6 he has what im having with a 8 oz bottle.
  
• play for an hour in walker or playmat.
  
• nap at about 7 or 8 for half an hour.
  *wakes up to toast or a light snack.
  *bath at 9 or 10.
  *8 oz bottle and bed.
  
  Its roughly though because it doesnt hit 5 and he is hungry if you know what i mean?
  
  Hollyxx

[ThingOne]

I'd back off for a bit too. You don't want to associate food with stress at such a young age.

I'd try with some suitable finger foods around and see how he goes. His dexterity will improve if he is hungry!

You could try stuff on rice cakes if you're not happy with carrots, etc.

[ThatBigGermanPrison]

He's eating a huge amount. Stop counting his food, it's only going to upset you. His stomach is the size of is fist - some babies have stretchier stomachs than others. Feed him in the front room if that's what it takes. be happy to throw away his leftovers. As soon as he loses interest, end the meal.