8 month old won’t open mouth and still gags with every spoon

[Shefliesonherownwings]

DS will be 8 months in a couple of days. We’ve been weaning about 6 weeks now, just starting with small tastes and now trying to make sure he has breakfast and dinner alongside all his milk.

He definitely prefers finger foods and will put those foods in his mouth to taste but doesn’t actually swallow much. I’m ok with that though as he’s showing interest and is good at picking up food and trying it.

But because not much goes in that way, I try spoon feeding as well. As soon as the spoon comes near his mouth he clamps it shut and turns his head away. On the very rare occasion I can get food in he gags and spits it out. Some of it is going in as the evidence is in his poos but very little. Is this ok? I actually have a 3 year old as well but I don’t remember him being like this with food. Any tips to make sure food is going in other than just to keep persevering?

[Libertyy]

Just keep introducing finger foods, also keep attempting to spoon feed with purée foods too, give the baby food without a spoon he may prefer it that way too.

[Iwishiwasasilentnight]

If he doesn’t want to be spoon feed and many babies don’t look into blw.

[ApolloandDaphne]

My DD2 hated being spoon fed. I had to accept that any solid food was going to be her choice and it took a while. She was probably around 12 months before she was eating a reasonable amount. Sometimes it's best just to leave it to them and offer lots of finger foods. DD2 learned to use a spoon herself very quickly left to her own devices.

[GHSP]

Do baby-led weaning. Just let him have finger foods and try what everyone else is having. Give him his own spoon and let him play with it. It’s messy at first but dc2 and dc3 were self-feeding with spoons at about this age because I did BLW from 6m

[Dilbertian]

My dc3 would not eat solids until nearly 9m. He just wasn't interested. He was a very big baby and his weight gain slowed down between about 5m and 9m (from 99th centile to 75th IIRC). Once he started solids it returned to his previous line within a couple of months.

Luckily he was my third dc, as otherwise I would have worried. He was breastfed, big, vigorous, engaged, developing well. 6'3" now.

If he's otherwise well just keep offering a variety of finger foods. Not much, one or two things a couple of times a day, and follow his interest.

[Shefliesonherownwings]

Thanks all, you’ve reassured me a bit more. We’ll definitely continue with the finger foods more and less spoon feeding. I have noticed he likes putting the spoon in his mouth so I put a tiny bit of food on it and give him the spoon which worked better. DS1 much preferred spoon feeding so this is all a bit alien for me. I’ll do a bit more BLW reading too. Thanks

[SassyPants87]

My second hated being spoon fed so we did BLW. The first few months were just him experimenting and not a lot going into his mouth. I would say around 10 months is when it all clicked and he was suddenly eating well! Your baby will get there :)

[Onceuponatimeinalandfaraway]

Give him finger foods. Most food can be served that way. For spoon food like Weetabix or porridge load the spoon and let him do it himself. Messy yes but better than making food a battle and refusal. My boy hates purées but happily eats the same food not puréed. He hates shop bought baby food too and won’t eat if I try feeding him that. So I cut all food into strips and let him have his pick. He does sometimes eat one food group and not another then other times he wants what he didn’t eat last time. Just keep offering a variety and letting him explore. They say babies eat what they need so follow his lead.

[Useruser1212]

I find that it really helps to give them some diluted apple juice after each spoonful. I did this when my son was 6 months and now at 7 and a half months he'll eat anything once he gets a little bit of juice to wash it down after every second mouthful.

[phoenixbiscuits]

When my DD was 8mo I couldn't see how she'd ever eat enough to stop drinking milk. By 1yo she was nearly off milk and it was mostly for routine and because she liked it.**

[Isthisexpected]

Switch to fully baby led weaning. You're trying to force feed him. Leave him be. Food before one is just for fun ie it's absolutely fine for him not to be swallowing much but instead enjoying the sensory experience himself.

[Shefliesonherownwings]

Thanks for the further replies, really useful. @phoenixbiscuits i was thinking the exact same thing this weekend. He just doesn’t ingest enough to replace a milk feed.

Bit harsh @Isthisexpected. I’m not force feeding him. I offer he spoon and if he turns his head away I don’t force it down his throat. If he does open up I pop the spoon in, that’s all.

He's currently sat with me playing with and tasting some toast fingers and boiled egg. Toast is a definite winner with him lol.

[Shefliesonherownwings]

Hi all, just wanted to come back to this thread as things haven’t really improved and I’m wondering whether to speak to HV or not.

DS is now 9 and a half months and still gagging/refusing a spoon on the rare occasion I try it. We are 90% baby led but he just doesn’t seem to eat any finger foods either. Aside from toast or things like Ella’s Kitchen puffs nothing really goes in. I’ve tried all sorts of veggies and fruits, proteins and dairy, I’ve cooked up little croquettes and rostis and it touches his mouth and then goes on the floor. I eat with him so he sees me eating and I do what I can to encourage to no avail.

He seems to have a really strong gag reflex and often spits up whatever does go in. He’s still on 4 bottles of formula a day and I just can’t see it reducing. I’m wondering whether to speak to the HV to see if there’s something wrong or if this is all normal still.

[Naptrappedmummy]

How is his weight gain, has he been dropping centiles? Is he mobile, sitting/crawling? I found with both mine the appetite for solids picked up as they crawled/cruised. The HV will probably just tell you to keep doing what you’re doing but it can’t hurt to get in touch.

[Flittingaboutagain]

I wouldn't worry at all. The whole point of baby led weaning is they get their on their own time just like walking and talking. If he gets to one and doesn't eat still then I'd be asking for help before then it's mainly just for sensory exploration. My first was well over one before really swallowing anything bar banana.

[Shefliesonherownwings]

Thanks for the replies. @Naptrappedmummy his weight is fine, I had him checked about 3 weeks ago and all good, tracking just above where he should be. He’s a real milk monster though so I expected he would be ok. He actually isn’t sitting unaided, not reliably anyway but is on the move. He does a kind of commmando drag rather than a crawl but is definitely mobile.

Thanks @Flittingaboutagain that does make me feel better. He seems to treat food as a game with throwing it all on the floor so I just can’t see a time where he’s actually eating three meal a day plus snacks but I’ll give it a bit longer I think. And just keep persevering.

[Naptrappedmummy]

Just a guess but as he isn’t sitting reliably this may affect his swallow, being able to sit independently is generally linked to readiness for solids as it means they can coordinate the actions needed to eat. May be worth another check with the HV just to make sure this isn’t putting him off eating?