Why don't family understand my baby doesn't eat or need to eat purees - arghhh

[Tapster]

Spent weekend with DH's family. DD 10 month old and have been doing BLW mainly because she hated purees to be honest. MIL saying to me I should perseve with purees as she was there feeding my 11 month old nephew mush on Friday afternoon - making out that I obviously not trying hard enough. MIL shocked me by holding my nephews mouth open while shoving food into it . SIL trying to force mush on me to feed my DD all weekend - while I order bangers and mash and cheese sandwiches for my DD. DD happily eating a whole peach in front of them thats obviously not normal while nephew will not eat finger food at all at 11 months - obviously completely normal.

I really don't care what/how my nephew eats but I felt we were treated as outcasts and freaks!

Why isn't BLW pushed by HVs along with the recommendation to not to wean until 6 months? Don't think one should be recommended without the other.

So proud of my DD though - self feeding yoghurt with her hands shocked them all.

[Tapster]

Thanks for the dust sheet idea will send DH to homebase at the weekend.

At least its not only my DD that loves eating yoghurt with her hands. Why are people so adverse to their children feeling their food and playing with it a bit.

[puffylovett]

dobn't worry tapster, we're getting the same from our parents. as in ' you were fed purees and it's not done you any harm, this BLW sounds like a load of rubbish, eh should be on 3 meals a day by 7 months' yada yada yada yada...

i get no support in real life and really feel quite isolated actually, especially as he's 6 mths and i'm STILL breastfeeding !! i think when you do something different from the norm, you come up against it with family and friends & it can be a struggle.

i have decided to tell them all to bog off and let us do it our way ! v impressed with the whole peach - did you cut it up or is he holding it already ?

[Tapster]

It is isolating isn't it? Doing BLW, wearing a sling and never giving a bottle seems to make you a bit of an oddity. Gave up on my NCT group due to their disapproval and lack of support.

First we gave chopped up peaches/strawberries etc, progressed to her eating a bit of a peach while I held it (you do need teeth), from about 9 months she could hold the peach herself and not drop it.

They are all so different - I had visions of my DD holding little brocolli sticks in each hand, she hates it . Happier with asparagus.

[gillhowe]

I'm sorry that you are getting that kind of reaction about the blw, if it is any comfort at all I am regularly made to feel bad by a friend because I don't blw! Its a minefield this parenting lark I think a lot of people are just really insecure about what they are doing and feel the need to justify it (to the denigration of other choices). Whatever you do there will always be someone to tell you its wrong!

Oh and if you want to really set the cat amoung the pigeons tell people you co-sleep, oh the number of lectures I've had about that one

[puffylovett]

well thank god for mnet, that's all i can say. is v nice to have like minded people !

you're right gill, it seems no matter what there is always going to be consternation. both dp and i have noticed this. because we do things our way, people seem to take it as a personal insult that their way is wrong or bad for their baby.

i suppose with feeding, it cuts to the very core of parenthood so it's a very personal thing !

so - how many teeth needed ? finsing plums and nectarines difficult because they slip out of his hands - but he loves to suck on them !

[Habbibu]

My daughter managed peaches without teeth pretty well ( the peaches with a full set she had more problems with...). Think I gave her slices to gum - peaches maybe slightly easier than nectarines as rougher skin was easier to hold.

[gillhowe]

DS loves trying to eat a whole nectarine even with no teeth. I take a bite to start it off then he does surprisingly well, its loads of fun. Plums are good too and a bit easier to handle!