Commute length - what’s your absolute max?

[Trampolineissues]

Hi all
there’s a job coming up I’d really like to apply for. It’s a 40 min drive (30 miles on an a road) compared to my current 15 minutes.
I have three chn - 2 would be at secondary when it started and independently travelling to and from school. My youngest would either have to come to the school with me or go to the local school and get collected by one of her siblings potentially 3 x a week roughly. (Who will be a year 4 child and the sibling y8)
whats the absolute max you’d commute? Is the drive worth the job? Any pay increase would be gone on fuel for a year or two but after that I’d make a profit

[RainbowColouredRainbows]

My commute is 45 minutes on a good run, but with peak time traffic it can be a good hour if not longer. Two years into my job they started extensive road works (18 months expected) and it's gone up to 1 hour in early morning traffic and 1h35 in peak time traffic. So just bear in mind it might up up too. I like the school so it's not too bad and also gives me time to properly decompress after work so I'm truly out of my work zone before I get home.

[Trampolineissues]

Oh wow that’s turned into a long journey hasn’t it 😬
I do really like this school. I worry about the impact on our family life but also think it could be a good chance to switch off for a while too. It’s not an awful road generally but I’m sure that 40 mins could increase regularly too.

[Malbecfan]

Mine is 28 minutes. It's 16 miles but most of it is on A/B roads with a 60 mph limit. Some has a 30 limit, some a 40 and a bit has a 20 limit. The longest I have spent is 90 minutes but that was due to either snow or flooding resulting in a 20+ mile detour.

When I first started teaching, I worked 5 miles from home. It easily took 30+ minutes to get there due to suburban commuter traffic. I found that more stressful. Then I relocated and did a 55 mile commute which took around an hour. I had a decent economical car with a great entertainment system and made sure that the commute was filled with music or talk radio, so it was part of the day to unwind from school. The first job and 55 miles job were pre-children although I worked at the 55 mile one until 2 weeks before DD1 arrived. I enjoy driving which is just as well because there is no suitable public transport in this part of the world.

For me it depends on the nature of the commute. Rural A roads are not too busy at 7.30-8 am and I am going against the main traffic flow. By contrast, crawling round the suburbs of a large city was a complete pain and I wouldn't want to do that again.

[Trampolineissues]

The nature of it is definitely true - I don’t mind driving if I’m just plodding along without making lots of decisions all the time
its the main a road out of our area but is ok at 7ish. I need to visit the school during working hours I think to check that out - thanks for sparking that idea! I’m judging it on weekend traffic which looks very different

[helloisitmeyourelookingfor]

Will your child's primary allow sibling pick ups? -ours won't

I work 18 miles away which off peak is 30 mins but is closer to 50 if I miss the sweet spot for leaving school -so staff meeting days!

[Trampolineissues]

I have no idea! She’s currently at my school which is about 15-20 mins drive so just travels in and out with me. She’d have to move to our local one to allow sibling collections so definitely something to check thanks

[ThanksItHasPockets]

45 mins is my max commute so that would be fine for me. My bigger concern would be the impact of your proposed arrangements on your children. Is your youngest settled at her current school and is she resilient and confident to cope with a move? I’d really caution against using siblings as regular after-school care. As pp have said some primary schools don’t permit it at all but as a secondary school teacher I have worked with a lot of older children who have this responsibility. It’s very limiting for them, as they can’t join clubs, do sports or do their homework in the library on their pick-up days, but it can also be very stressful for them if they get a detention or if their class is delayed coming out at the end of the day, for example if they have PE last period. A year 4 child needs proper after-school care, whether that’s after-school club or a childminder.

Sorry to sound very negative but tbh the commute would not be my primary concern here.

[Trampolineissues]

She’s settled but would cope with a move. For long boring reasons - a move would actually be a good thing.
my thought around the after school arrangements were that she’d go into ASC (like she does at current school) which either me, her dad or brothers could collect her form depending on what was happening that day eg if I got stuck with an issue at school or whatever. Not every day and not straight after school - more as a back up. But yes - there is part of me that doesn’t want to put that onto the older two.
she could come with me to the job if I got it. Just means she’s got a long commute too. Hard one to figure out really.

[RainbowColouredRainbows]

Would the new school accept her for definite?

[Trampolineissues]

Yes both have room near us and the one with the job

[PumpkinPie2016]

I have only ever done 15-20 minutes on A/B roads locally. Current is 15 minutes. But then, I'm maybe a tad lazy 😂 I don't think 40 minutes is over the top for most people.

What stands out to me though is that the youngest may have to be collected by a sibling 3 days a week. I would advise you to think very carefully about putting this on the sibling. I often had to collect my younger sister from school and hold the Fort until parents came home. I really resented it to be honest.

[ThanksItHasPockets]

It’s good that you have considered the arrangements for the children. Move your youngest to your local school. You don’t want to be trapped in the new school if it doesn’t work out for you and you don’t want to spend every weekend driving over to the area where you work because her whole social life is there. Moving in year 4 gives her a good chance to make local friends, some of whom will presumably transfer to secondary with her.

IME, ASC are even stricter than schools about pick-up requirements. I don’t know any who would release a child to a sibling under the age of 18 but obviously local arrangements will vary. I don’t really understand why this is likely to be necessary three times a week unless it is a very senior role like headteacher or DSL. You will just need to leave work by 5 and make alternative arrangements on the days when you have parents’ evening or twilight.

[RainbowColouredRainbows]

@Trampolineissues

Yes both have room near us and the one with the job

What about secondary schools? If she goes to your local one, it means she'll go up not knowing anyone?
I think I'd be tempted to find a local school and find wraparound childcare that does drop off/see if school has before and after school club. It might mean you'll end up doing the bulk of your planning/marking from home so you can go get her at a reasonable time and then ask the older ones to support for parents evening/late finishes and give a decent pocket money that week.

[Trampolineissues]

It’s a headteacher role so will come with the unexpected! But a certain amount of work can come home definitely but I definitely would need to be at school later a few nights a week for meetings etc
she already doesn’t go to a local school but socialises locally in clubs and will go to local secondary.
lots to think about - might not even get it, but don’t want to apply without knowing it’ll work!

[ThanksItHasPockets]

Ah, it’s certainly relevant that it’s a headship and all the more reason to move her to the local school. It’s hard enough starting a new school without also being the headteacher’s child!