Struggling with the decision when to euthanise.

[Nightowlpossibly]

My dog is almost 14 years old, he has slowed down a lot in the last year, due to arthritis, but has been generally healthy throughout his life.
In early January he had idiopathic vestibular syndrome. He made a good recovery and was back to his normal self. However in April he had another bout
Of vestibular syndrome but with slightly worse symptoms than the previous time. Started to get better but didn't quite return to normal before he relapsed again.

Vet has now diagnosed a brain tumour and prescribed steroids to possibly shrink tumour and keep dog more comfortable, but was unable to give us a timescale as to how it would progress, only that it was palliative treatment. We know we will have to euthanise soon, vet says we will just know but I'm not sure we will, and am worried we will leave it too late or do it too soon.

Dogs current quality of life positives:
Still interested in food and drinking, possibly more ,due to steroids
Enjoys treats
Able to go to toilet outside no accidents in house (which vet said would likely happen)
Still likes to be petted and interacts with us but in much shorter bursts
Doesn't appear to be in pain no whimpering, or whining.
No seizures so far. Which I believe is a common symptom with the brain tumour.

Things I am concerned about: spends lot of time sleeping.
Struggles to get up from lying position looks like a big effort to do so. But does just about manage to.
Is very wobbly, stumbles and falls some days. back legs seem weaker.
Is lethargic a large part of day and looks really tired sometimes, but has periods of time where he seems brighter.
No longer going for walks as too wobbly, only goes out into garden for toilet.

I am really torn, about whether his current quality of life is enough, or whether we should euthanize sooner. He was diagnosed a month ago. And Is gradually declining. I am so stressed and worried about him, as some days I feel it is time, but then he seems brighter and I think maybe not quite yet. But I know he isn't going to get better. I worry the point will come where he is unable to get up at all. We are heartbroken but trying to enjoy the time we have left with him. I just want to do it at the right time and be certain it is. Does anyone think the the time could be now.

[Passmethegin67]

So sorry Nightowl.
Never an easy decision to make but a good death is the greatest, kindest gift we can give them.
It will feel raw, you will see him in all his usual places and look for him in the morning and when you come home but gradually it does get better and you will be able to remember him with happiness instead of sorrow.
Not long after we lost our Max, someone said to me, when I apologised for breaking down, that it was natural for me to be upset as our pets love us unconditionally and we don't fall out or have cross words. It made me laugh as Max and I frequently fell out - he had a certain way of looking at me and sulking when told off or made to do something he didn't want to. Remembering this made me smile again.

[fragrantphoenixinwaiting]

Night owl
I’m so sorry for what you are going through. It’s so dreadfully hard but you must remember that by your actions you saved your lovely old boy from suffering. He couldn’t make the decision so you had to make it for him, as in all other things. It really is the last loving act you can do for them. My beautiful girl went last Monday. She was 13 and had had enough of life. It was her time to go and I’m clinging onto the fact, which I know to be true, that it was right that she should go. I’m glad that I’m the one suffering and not her. You gave your boy the best in life and soon the good memories will overtake the heartache, although it never goes away fully.
One of the hardest things at the moment is coming down in the morning. The first thing I’ve done for 13 years is let her in the garden and feed her. It’s horrible to think that you’re going through the same thing.
My beautiful old girl and your lovely old boy are having a well earned rest while we cry.
Sending you love and strength.

[fragrantphoenixinwaiting]

Passmethegin
Glad you can smile. The good times really are worth what we go through at the end.
Love to you as well.

[Nightowlpossibly]

to fed up and fragrantphoenix, sorry for your recent losses too.


Passmethegin, everything you say is so true, I see him everywhere. They are So much part of our lives and daily routine, their presence is missed so badly. Likewise about the cross words, just like any other family member they can annoy you, and be a PITA sometimes, you still love them though. But it is those memories that do make you smile. We were remembering some of those last night and I was laughing through my tears. Your max sounds like a funny character.

Fragrantphoenix, I like the idea of our seniors having a well earned rest in the sunshine, after a long and happy life. I can imagine mine looking rather bemused at all of these tears as I am not usually so emotional.

This thread has really helped thank you to everyone who has replied and shared your experiences, and confirmed it will get better and hurt less in time.

[TheDogsMother]

. I've been through the same thing just a few weeks ago and its heartbreaking. My thoughts are with you but please be assured you did the right thing. The pain will be so raw for you right now but I promise it will get better. There will be still be sad moments but you will start to enjoy to good memories of him too.

[Passmethegin67]

We lost Max some nine years ago now and last year became 'pawparents' to Nelson who is now 16 months old! I was worried before Nelson joined us that I could never love him as much as I did Max and I almost grieved anew for him in the weeks leading up to bringing Nels home. Since Nelson joined us though it's been all about him. The quirks and characteristics that make golden retrievers so lovable live on in him - even the extreme sulking - and I'm so happy to have a dogga back in my life. It takes time, allow yourself time to mourn and you will get there. Lots of love.