Retired Greyhound - Help day 2 and I'm a blubbering mess

[ruthsmumkath]

I have rehomed a retired greyhound and feeling like I have made a terrible mistake.

I am a SAHM with 4 kids. Lo's are 11,8,4 and 1.

Yesterday I was stressed but doggy was calm.

Today he has a terrible stomach (runny poos), soiled in the house all ok if not ideal. He follows me everywhere.

The thing is this afternoon he has started 'challenging' me jumping in front of me and the kids. Jumping up and acting crazy.

I left him home today when I picked up the kids from school as the constant following me was driving me potty.

I'm trying to ignore him and instructed the kids to too but I really am not sure where to go now.

He is my first dog.

My husband is working away and hasn't met him yet.

He has been returned from a home once although behaviour wasn't mentioned as the reason (although the reason did sound a bit flaky).

I love dogs but not sure if I am not suited to them or if I am panicking too soon. My kids come first. But ultimately I don't know what to do.

I don't want to be a blubbering depressed mum just to keep a dog.

Makes no sense but please I'm desperate any comments experience would be a godsend!!!!

[laundryeverywhere]

I started following Hounds First sighthound rescue on FB after they rehomed a pregnant dog found by a MNer they are a really good rescue. They offer rescuers an online course on dog care that sounds really helpful and I am sure they would let you take this course in return for a small donation and give you some advice if your own rescue is not being helpful.

[mollie123]

so agree with pacificdogwood
comfy crate (i.e a nice cave to him) gives him a quiet, safe place any time you want to get on with other things - good for all of you
he is clingy because he is traumatized and greys /lurchers are very sensitive dogs (and even more so if he has been in a rescue and been returned once already)
Chappie is good food (mixed with special greyhound /lurcher dry food - Burgess) and avoid anything too rich or with vegetables!
RGT should be giving you more support - do contact them as they should be the experts.

[cheshcat]

Please don't give up on your greyhound! They are wonderful gentle dogs and perfect to have with children. Ours took a little while to settle in. Get them onto a good quality dog food to give them all the nutrients they need. Show them where you want them to go to the toilet as they don't want to be dirty. We have a dog door which suits our greyhound as she can come and go when she pleases. Feel free to ask questions

[laundryeverywhere]

One thing I would say if the dog is jumping in front of you as you describe it is not challenging you, it probably wants something, like a walk, play or food.

[mollie123]

cheshcat
you have a dog door for a greyhound never seen one that big or do you have a miniaturised grey
sorry - off topic

[SunshineAndShadows]

OP not sure if you're still here but I'm interested - what were your original reasons for wanting a dog? Do those reasons still stand?

The benefits of responsible pet ownership for your children are vast, and dog ownership may be a way of teaching yourself to relax a little bit - tbh you're coming across as being incredibly anxious over very normal dog behaviour, so persevering with your greyhound may help you all in the long run. Are you usually this anxious? What exactly is worrying you so much?

You've had lots of good advice and I hope you make an attempt to at least try with this dog.

[tabulahrasa]

"you have a dog door for a greyhound"

Lol, I was thinking that too...by the time it's a big enough one for a greyhound, wouldn't that just be, well, a door? Lol

[ruthsmumkath]

Hi

Thank you - I am a robust person - not taken to outbursts. I love dogs but have never lived with one before. If I hadn't got my youngest hanging from the dog, lying in his bed, pinching his toys, pulling his tail, putting his fingers in his mouth them all would be well. Between constantly keeping the LO away from dog and getting dog to settle I am at my wits end.

I have small pets that have had no care since Monday other than food.

I did not realise how big a commitment I was making - but the only thing that came up at the home check was making our fence higher.

Maybe I was too quick to get one - I am now off dogs for a while. My OH likes him - but he is often away and out 6am - 9pm so can't care for him. The plan is now to take him back today. I can not cope and I can't imagine he is happy. I am literally going though the feed, walk, etc like a robot.

It was the wrong thing to do but I don't think me, my kids, the dog should suffer long term just because I made a mistake.

Thanks

If I ever do get a dog again (years away) I will go into with open eyes and almost lay certainly a smaller breed from a puppy - when I have much older kids.

Maybe I'm a complete cow?

I'm sorry.....

[laundryeverywhere]

Sorry to hear it hasn't worked out but I don't think it will do the dog any harm to move as he has just been with you for a short time. They are a lot of work and you can't be sure how you will feel till you try having one in the house. Hope it all works out for you and the dog.

[BumgrapesofWrath]

OP don't beat yourself up.

The same happened to us. RGT were very happy for us to take a greyhound away without making us fully aware of the implications.

We had a home check where they could see our set up, and saw we had two small children.

I spent days just taking him out to wee just to have him come in and wee again. Sometimes over the kids toys. He frightened easily and would jump on the kitchen table - I had to get my dad to come round and get him off one day as he was too big and heavy for me to get down and I didn't want to break his legs.

It really got me down and after four days he went back.

I've got experience of dogs and i've never experienced anything like it.

IMO the RGT don't do enough to make you fully aware of how a dog who hasn't been in a house will react. We were just told they were gentle and trained easily. When we sent him back it became apparent this happens all the time. I think the RGT just want them gone and want the donation.

We got a greyhound as we wanted to "do the right thing". With hindsight, I think a puppy would have been easier.

[ruthsmumkath]

Thank you Laundry - feel guilty - but then I feel guilty for my youngest son too. My last baby. He has been to the park everyday with the dog which he loves - but his mum (me) has been emotional and nagging him to stay away from the dog. I had numerous losses and took a lot of medication in order to have my last precious baby. I want to be a proper mum to him.

I now realise having a dog is like (or even) worse than a new baby. Because I already have a needy child I can not cope with an additional needy thing.

It is such a shame that you can't borrow a dog first as a trial. Or have a mechanical one like those baby things they give teenagers that cry, need feeding, etc etc - it would save so much guilt, tears and heartache all round.

Thank you.

[ruthsmumkath]

Thank you Grapes - yep - they said they had an ideal pet and he was really easy. I had no idea. The only thing in their defence is none of the people I spoke to had kids. Maybe they didn't realise what like with young kids is like either.

I feel guilty - but I feel like I can actually breathe now the decision is made.

Thank you for your kind post - I feel exactly the same as you describe.

I love animals but I love my kids more........,

[TheoriginalLEM]

you have done the right thing

[mollie123]

agree that RGT should be more careful with their rehoming procedure
it is unfair to the new owners and the poor unhappy dog - I just hope he will find a kind loving home that he deserves.
agree they should do more than check how high fences are - that is the least of the potential rehoming problems. I had a run in with a rescue centre who were so concerned about my fence height (it is not a fence as such it is a hedge but quite wide and 4 foot high and backs onto a field ) as a 6 ft fence seems to be a necessity for them but would obscure my lovely view .
I ended up doing a private rescue and the lurcher dog never, ever jumped the hedge.

[ruthsmumkath]

Thanks! He will easily find a great home with people able to love him. The RGT are £140 up and I can actually sleep tonight.

Agree PP why obsess about a fence and then not warn adopters that they know have never owned a dog or those with little kids. I was a naive animal lover. I now know what is involved and years off when all the kids are at school if we decide to get a puppy then atleast we will have our eyes open a little.

Now off to clean out the Guineas and the hamster!

[JoffreyBaratheon]

You have done the right thing for you and your family and ultimately, the dog. Sounds like you have your hands full with your young uns, and the rescue should not have rehomed to someone with such young kids. I have 5 kids and can't imagine introducing an unknown dog to a one year old. I did once get an adult dog when I was pregnant but I am a very, very experienced dog owner and the dog was unusually steady and good-natured, not to say bombproof. Not something to be done lightly.

I sort of doubt a reputable rescue would even have let you adopt? When I was in the Dogs Trust getting my pup, I overheard them giving the bum's rush to a young pregnant woman with a young child - and they didn't mess about, it was a firm "No"!

If your overwhelming feeling is relief - you so did the right thing.

I wouldn't feel guilty. You wanted to do a good thing that didn't work out. Only good people do good things that sometimes don't work out.

[MuddhaOfSuburbia]

I was desperate to get a hound from the RGT about nine years ago

when they found out the dimensions of our living room, that i'd never owned my own dogs, I had 3yo twins AND guinea pigs they gave me a kind but firm NO

I was very upset at the time but, reading your story, I know they did the right thing- and it's awful for you that they didn't do the same in your case

[MuddhaOfSuburbia]

years off when all the kids are at school if we decide to get a puppy then atleast we will have our eyes open a little.

this ^

in a quick succession of events, my dcs started nursery, a fox ate our guinea pigs and we acquired a staff pup

it was BRILLIANT (mostly)

[Chillywhippet]

It took us ages to become dog owners. Loads of visits to RSPCA. They did approve us to rehome rabbits but most of the dog discussions went like this
"See it's about breed experience and we can't let you have a dog because you haven't had a dog."

We ended up with our pair of adult whippets when our youngest was 8. We got more confident with dogs by walking very sick neighbours collie everyday. then we looked after friends dog. for days and nights at a time when they were away.

The thought of you trying to juggle an untrained dog and untrained child is really daunting. I love walking them but I can leave my kids at home if weather is bad and don't have to juggle buggy etc. not saying it can't be done but all adds to the stress.

When our dogs came I was really anxious. Couldn't sleep. Bad stomach. Then on day 3 one had a rumbly stomach and the other a sore paw. I sat by their bed trying to decide what to do and just suddenly felt it would be ok.

If you think about dog or puppy in future it may be worth looking at the new puppy threads here to help prepare.

[Dieu]

All the best OP, but please do be aware, re your future plans to get a pup, that they are SUCH hard work!

[Wotsitsareafterme]

I would take another rescue greyhound in a heartbeat but I hadn't because my kids are 3 and 6. We have a lunatic cocker instead.

Here's what I remember from bringing my greyhound home 15 years ago. The housetraining was hard work we didn't get on top of that for months - took 4 days with the puppy! She could only really tolerate greyhound food it's dry you buy it from a feed merchant. When settled in they like it with gravy. She was very sad and anxious and couldn't bear to be separated from us but she wouldn't eat in front of us either - that took patience and tweaking. This was my partner and I when I was home all the time and we had no kids. Her anxiety improved a great deal but she still had it. She never turned in to a bombproof dog.
If you keep it I second a crate - I see no other way forward and it might really help settle the dog.
When you go out out the radio in it really helped my girl. God I miss her

[NantucketNightbird]

Think long and hard about getting a puppy at any point. Mine is now 6 months and considering she is a chocolate Labrador she came to me house trained at 8 weeks and slept 8-6 no accidents straight away plus she is very calm. But it has taken until now to love her. I've had some awful days in terms of I want my old life back. But am glad I persevered but at the same time would never get another dog. My cats on the other hand well I would love at least 20

[PacificDogwod]

Oh, I'm glad you reached a conclusion that reduces your stress and gives the dog a good chance of a new start

My mother always said having the dog was like having another child, and now that I've done it, I agree with her.

Please think long and hard what you want from a dog and what you can offer a dog - realistically.
I know many people have dogs (and puppies! Madness IMO) with young children, but I knew I could not have copes with that. My youngest was 5 when we got Ddog and that was/is nerve-wrecking enough.

I love puppies and they are heart-meltingly cute, but having had 4 DCs I am so NOT doing broken nights again. Never mind potty house training…

V best of luck.