Is anyone else watching the 'on the breadline' programme ??

[MrsMorgan]

Why is that whenever they feature a lone parent in a programme like this, they always have to have loads of kids, messy houses and generally look and behave excatly how most people percieve lone parents to be ??

It is so annoying.

[kittya]

Did you see the two kids from The worlds strictest parents this week? both middle class private school educated and a pair of complete prats, chained smoked all the way through it.

[elkiedee]

I found it on Catch Up TV when I saw this thread and watched it because it's in Leeds. Quite depressing, and so is the encouragement of us all to make judgements of the families featured. Do those of us who are better off really spend our money so much more wisely all the time?

One of the sad moments was the kid sent home from school apparently for smoking there. I really don't like smoking and understand that it should be against school rules, but I would be concerned about kids who are very likely to drop out of education etc being sent home as a punishment, it's not going to help them. Lots of kids I was at school with started smoking there, many from more middle class homes and with much better prospects, and I don't believe teachers had no idea who was smoking etc.

[simplesusan]

I found the whole programme depressing.

I didn't feel sorry for anyone on the show.

How can you feel sorry for such filthy/lazy/slobs.
Smoking boozing, stealing etc etc.

My friend lives in the immediate are where Mel B was staying and she says it really is that bad. It is a complete shit whole.
Did you notice the iron gates in the camera shot at the end of the streets-well they have been put there as a last resort by the council to try and keep the drug dealers/thieves/criminals out. Apparently they are padlocked and only the council and residents have keys.

Oh and the mother who was crying for her chained up son is a thief herself and is well know for handling stolen goods.

[Blondeshavemorefun]

the ones with young children had chaperones

obv the tv directors are going to use houses that are dirty

they are not going to use familys who are on benifits yet are surviving and have nice houses

i did find the lask of sheets and hygiene and nutrional food sad

but

as usual if the mum hasnt been shown by her own parents then she wont know any difference

all the food was from icelend, and cheep and cheerful

and as usual yes they show familys who smoke cant cant afford decent food/ a bed for one child (the one who slept on a matress in living room)

thing is these celebs swarm in, do their bit, then bugger off and life will go back the same for these familys

and yes what use is a free gym membership when it is going to take 90mns to get there and back and obv bus fares

[kittya]

Would you honestly go to a gym that was 45 minutes away? free or not.

[MrsMorgan]

Mel B had a chaperone too.

[ABitBatty]

How come the male participants need a chaperone but not the two females?

[thedollshouse]

They feature families like these because it makes good tv.

There are plenty of families on the breadline who live in smart tidy houses and eat healthy meals but of course they don't have the shock factor so would never be featured in the programme.

I didn't see the programme btw.

[Stayingscarygirl]

What you are saying is exactly what I was trying to describe, Riven.

[poshsinglemum]

I'm on benefits and I do take great pride in my home but the sheer poverty of it is really getting me down.

[Stayingscarygirl]

I'm one of the people who has mentioned depression. Of course everyone in those circumstances isn't depressed, and if what I said read that way, then I am sorry.

What I was trying to describe is the feeling I imagine you get when every single thing in life is a struggle - your diet may be poor (due to lack of funds and lack of skills in budgeting and healthy cooking on the cheap) so you don't have much energy, and what energy you do have goes on the basics - to me that feels like how I feel when I am depressed (well, most of the time, actually) - just making a meal is a huge mountain to climb, and tidying a room is an even bigger one, and you can only climb one mountain, so the tidying gets left. Before long, the mess is beyond your capabilities - it simply is too big a mountain.

I struggle with this feeling and the inability to get going on anything most days, and I live a pretty comfortable life. God knows how I'd cope if I were in their circumstances - badly, probably.

I think it is one explanation of why people get in such a state of mess and squalor - which isn't to say that there aren't others, and yes, some are just lazy.

[CarGirl]

Bobbing that's how I feel, we've never walked in their shoes and I cannot imagine living in an environment like that and thinking that my life could be different.

[BobbingForPeachys]

nancy did anyone say depression causes it always?

Some are lazy wankers, fact

But somea ren't- and those people deserve help and not to be labelled as lazy wankers, or to be amde to feel that depression is nothing but an excuse

[Nancy66]

There were four homes - two were clean and two were absolutely filthy.

[Nancy66]

I think the 'depression' tag is too convenient, sorry.

I accept that some of them may be suffering from depression but, however unpalatable it may be, many are just lazy wastes of space.

[CarGirl]

mosschops exactly, there are at least 2 towns I personally know of that have this kind of issue - there are probably more, so many have them have no industry left either steel making or mining.

Circumstantial depression does exist though. I have a friend with a chronic pain illness they have diagnosed depression but have clearly stated to her that she is depressed because of her situation and definately not a case of that she was depressed and this is adding to her condition IYSWIM.

Yes some people are sunny and make the best of everything whatever life throws at them, which is great.

[BobbingForPeachys]

Nah its not all about education, but education makes it easier, and if youre trying to break the mould enough knowck backs becuiase of a lack of education will possibly help you give up

Somepeople get depressed, some don't, that's just the way it is- it's why DH ahs spent the last five years on anti-d's and I haven't despite having the same things going on. GP says its due to latent seratonin levels in DH's brain (being lower at the start so a drop is morelikely to cause depression). Don't know,its just the way things are.

The motivation to get a job- ah if we knew how to give that we'd be laughing wouldn't we? But then again no we wouldn't, because there aren't any jobs anyway. Especially in these sorts of areas.

[mosschops30]

I disagree about circumstantial depression, there are people who go through terrible things and have had terrible lives and are not depressed.

The thing about looking for work etc is all about education then, how is it that young people feel a job should drop on their lap and if it doesnt they'll stay in bed til 3pm and hang round the streets (god I could have killed that boy in Mel B's house).

(just wondering which NE town youre talking about as I am from the NE, it could be a few)

[BobbingForPeachys]

Yes MC youa re right, there is a massive difference

But people whoa re depressed are more likely to end up in this situatioon, and depression runs in famillies; lack of motivation is a genuine symptom of that.

It's not just depression- plenty of low leverl SN in non working famillies for example, and other psychiatirc illnesses- either you'remore at risk if you haven't got work, or you are mroe likely to not get a job or lose it becuase of it. I don'tmean full on disability- but the borderline stuff that goes just above the help level in education.

And of course even if you don't have these issues- maybe your aprents did so you missed school to care, or your parents just didn't give a shit about school.

So many ways to get down that far, very few ways back up again- it takes a certain drive to do so,and many people simply do not have it.

[CarGirl]

But circumstances can cause you to be depressed. Inagine what it is like to have been brought up in that environment, chances are you are going to replicate it as Colditz said you're not going to think wow I@m going to be so different.

Also it can be cultural to not move away to look for work etc.

The programme makers will have found the most deprived areas for them to go to it's certainly not representative of all "poor", "deprived" areas but it is represensitive of some.

I have a friend who works with older teenagers in the NE there is one town that is so insular they will generally not consider travelling outside of it to get work. So we're now talking that many of them are 3rd & 4th generation of not working because there is no money or work in that town.

[mosschops30]

Depression is an illness, its not feeling sorry for yourself because your life is shit.
Saying that this is the reason for the way they are is an insult to people who genuinely suffer from depression.

You have to take some responsibility instead of blaming everything youre going through on something or someone else!