Do you think 16 year olds should go to swanky cocktail bars?

[abigailsfs]

Some of my DS friends have started to go to cocktail bars and he wants to join. Not sure how I feel about it. Firstly, I want him to focus on GCSEs and not go out late and be too knackered to revise and then the other thing is I just feel it’s a bit too soon. A pub (despite them being underage) seems ok ish, but a cocktail bar just feels like something you do when you’re older. AIBU?

Don't you have to be 18 to go to bars?

No

they all have fake IDs…

He's underage, surely they won't let him in?

Well no, I wouldn't allow that.

I’d find it extremely unlikely that a bunch of 16 year olds are routinely being served in a ‘swanky’ cocktail bar. Nowadays you have to basically look 30 to get away with being served in most decent establishments.
How the hell are they affording it either. Cocktails round here costs about £8 each!
And no, of course they shouldn’t be there. Who on earth would think they should be?

given most now want passports or drivers licence I find it hard to believe they get in, can afford the drive and are mature enough for it

I guess the parents of the other kids. I don’t get it either. Just seems totally ridiculous

Has he got money to afford to buy drinks?
Has he got a fake ID?
I'd be totally against this but I'd be very glad he's talking to you, so I might allow it occasionally in return for revision or chores or whatever. Or as a treat after GCSEs.
16 is a tricky age, some parents have very biddable easy going teenagers that do exactly what they are told and other parents seem to allow their kids to do what they like. And many are in between.
Keeping communication open is the most important thing, even if it sometimes means your DC does something you don't like.

Would have thought the price would be prohibitive, what do they do, get one cocktail and 10 sraws?

Any licensed premises will very quickly get in trouble for letting under 18s in not to mention losing the business of adult customers. Where are these children getting enough money to spend this amount on cocktails and going out?

If you know this is happening you should report it to your local licensing team.

Where's he getting the money for expensive cocktails?

The trouble with young folk these days is they feel obliged to tell their DPs everything. When I was young (80s) of course we did underage drinking but on the sly as I knew my DPs wouldn't approve.

The official line has to be that at 16 he is too young. I'm sure DS was drinking at 16 but it's only since age 17 that he's been going to night clubs ( fake ID).

I highly doubt that they are "swanky" cocktail bars, unless there's a secret portal into the world of Gossip Girl!!!

No to fake ID and no to having enough money to go to swanky cocktail bars for a 16yo.

I don't see why it's any different. You're either old enough to drink in bars/oubs or you're not. I can't see why the swankiness has anything to do with it.

No, and I doubt that the cocktail bars want them to be there either! Not the place to be for a crowd of 16 year olds.

Where on earth do you live that you’ve never seen a swanky cocktail bar? Under a rock??! There are plenty

Not sure why the kind of bar is relevant here?

A lot of ‘swankier’ places around our area now have a no under 21s policy, especially on Fri/Sat nights

Well I was going to bars and nightclubs at 15. But that was back in the olden days when they didn't really ask for ID. However I don't know if I'd be keen on my 16 yo going to a bar these days. I'd fear for their safety no matter how (s)wanky the bar.

Swankier places are 21+ and about £15 a drink aren’t they? But presuming they can get in and afford a drink then I don’t see how it differs to the pub. Either you’re ok with him going out drinking with the fake ID or not…

my 16 year old has a 9pm curfew and goes out once in a blue moon...very popular at school but we live in north iraq and it's just the norm here. don't see teenagers out at night until at least 18/19

We used to do this a lot when I was that age.

To be honest they were a safer and more civilised environment than most of the other licensed premises around. Less busy, drank more slowly as drinks more expensive/took longer to order and make.

So maybe check out the ones in question online and see what they are like or ask around. Then either hold to one of:

1. It’s illegal to drink at your age, don’t do it
2. Tell him which places you think are most suitable, based on some evidence

DD and her friends used to do the cocktail bar thing whilst still at school. Now she’s at uni she tends to stick to ‘spoons but that’s probably down to her social circle widening a bit.