What does your young teenager boy do?

[Lua]

We are in a rut. DS, who is 13, does not seem to have an interest in anything else beside gaming. I believe this overeliance on virtual life is damaging to young kids (13 is still very young!) and do not give free access. However, one minute after coming home the begging for X box, you tube, or some other technology starts. Relationship with friend is through X box, very rarely there is any kind of face to face social. No interest in sports, or anything else really. I am desperate trying to facilitate some "real life" hobby. What does your son do? Any suggestions?

[Lua]

Thanks cloudtree - I had set the limit at one hour a day. Big mistake, obviously, because there is always a reason why he should stay longer... Maybe I'll change for weekends only but a longer period.

[AlexanderHamilton]

Yes, we went during Feb half term instead og going on holiday at Easter (daughter's GCSE year anyway)

Ds has an asd so has an obsessive nature anyway. His behaviour and moods were terrible when he was gaming all the time.

[Twofishfingers]

Poopsqueek I would agree with the points you are making, but some of the games the kids play these days are extremely addictive. So it becomes chicken and eggs - does a child not want to socialise because of the gaming, or is the child playing because they don't want to socialise? Fortnight is a good example. It's all over the newspapers, TV news that this game is terribly addictive and kids need therapy to learn how to socialise again.


[https://www.birminghammail.co.uk/news/health/computer-game-addiction-now-treated-14795005]

[cloudtree]

Yes OP I'd suggest that it would be better to have 7 hours spread

2 hours friday
3 hours saturday
2 hours sunday

than 1 hour each day.

I'm mean and mine get perhaps an hour on a Friday evening if they push for it and are not doing anything else (usually playing cricket on a friday evening). Then they can have two hours max on a Saturday and Sunday but only once everything else is done. This means there is good uptake of chores on a weekend morning to get them out of the way.

[Lua]

twofish - I hate to blame a game, but yes, his obsession has gone way up when fortnite made an entrance in his life...

[PeterIanStaker]

Air cadets is the main interest and takes up two evenings and often at least one day at the weekend, followed by gaming, then martial arts, then hanging out with friends, then somewhere way down the list is playing instruments which has more or less given up the ghost this year (which I'm not hugely bothered about).

Cadets really was a turning point for him. He was very self-absorbed and quite unsociable until he joined.

[lljkk]

Scouts is way more than my 14yo DS does.

DS has a paper round (Sunday mornings) & has just barely joined the school support team -- means about once every 3 wks in term time, he helps out with event like induction evening. Nothing else, never been a 'joiner'.

DC like fortnite & got a bit tetchy about getting off it for a couple of weeks, but it's out of their systems, now (mostly).

[Peanutbuttercups21]

My Ds of 13 loves gaming and youtube

He does Army cadets twice a week, and martial arts and cricket

I always tell him that as long as he keeps up his sports and HW, I won't nag if he spends a lot of time gaming

Balance, I guess, is what we aim for

My other teen does not like sport, but plays guitar and piano and does tennis (grudgingly)'once a week

Sometimes I feel like a demented tiger mum

[BarbarianMum]

We ban screens totally 4 days a week (Mon-Thurs) exactly to avoid this nag, nag, nag. If they complain they are bored they are offered chores to do - they then think of something they'd rather be doing (reading, listening to music, skate park, call on friends).