What happens if GCSE's are a disaster? Sorry, long

[fresh]

DS2 is just 15. End of Yr 10 exam results are looking grim - E's and F's although I won't get the full details until next week. So we have a year to work out a plan. He's been working at a higher level than this day-to-day at school but always finds exams difficult. He panics and shuts down.

We went to an open day at the local FE college to scope out IT courses at BTEC Level 2 and 3. Level 2 needs 4 GCSEs at grade D including Maths and English, Level 3 needs 4 GCSEs at grade C inc Maths and English.

DS thinks he has no hope of Grade C in Maths and English, so if he gets Ds then he might get on to the Level2 (although it's very oversubscribed). He's also quite shy with new people so I think the interview would be a tough call as well.

So what happens if his grades are low and he doesn't get on to the Level 2 course? Do we have to put him through a Level 1 where they will try and teach him GCSE English and Maths again? He isn't ever (I don't think) going to be able to answer questions about how Steinbeck conveys certain things in Of Mice and Men - he doesn't even understand the question! So what's the point of putting him through another year of it?

As I understand it he can't just get himself a job, he has to stay in education or training. Trouble is, apprenticeships need GCSE's in English and Maths so we're back to square one.

He's organised, practical, funny and can demonstrate persistence for things he likes, usually strategy games (I know, don't flame me). He's just not 'academic'. Which is fine by me, and I know all the stuff about Richard Branson being dyslexic and having no exams, but how on earth do we get round the GCSE question?

If I thought it would work I'd spend the next year working with him on his English GCSE and DH could do the same with Maths, but he is incredibly stubborn and doesn't want to be seen to be learning anything. He worked out in Reception class that if you were well-behaved and helpful, you could stay below the radar without actually having to expose your brain to a teacher, and since then there hasn't been a teacher willing to push past that.

I could of course stand back, do nothing, watch the carnage and let him reap the consequences, but my worry is that he'll just confirm his own view that he's thick if he gets crap grades, and the downward spiral will continue. That seems very harsh to me.

I'm at my wits' end. Has anyone else been through this and come out the other side with a happy teenager? Thanks for reading.

[fresh]

Thanks. All I want is for him to find the place which suits him, I don't really care where it is.

[Beastofburden]

For the right child it is in no way second best. It might be perfect for him. Hope it all works out.

[fresh]

I've heard very good things about our local college, and it felt great when we went to the open evening. They have a stonemason's course which is nationally renowned apparently (not that DS2 would be a stonemaston, but still!)

[Beastofburden]

and they get drop outs too where ppl just dont turn up.

My experience is that once you are part of the family they look after you very well at FE college. Its all about "progression" so if he doesn't get his first choice, they could offer another progression towards his chosen level 3 course. They want them to do well, that what is so nice.

[fresh]

Thanks Beast that's a good point about taking a slightly different L2 course. I think I just got a bit freaked by the level of oversubscription to their courses, but of course they may say they had 60 applicants when actually only half of those applicants went on to get the grades they needed.

[Beastofburden]

He may also self-regulate as he gets older. DS1 used to take his gaming kit out of his bedroom until exams were over. Even now he doesn't buy a new game until he has finished his exams.

In your shoes I would be happy with the level 2 course if that's how it goes. Better to be a bit overqualified and sail through it, and have a guaranteed progression onto level 3. it might also mean that if he can't get into the level 2 for exactly what he wants, there's another level 2 at the same college that he could do. FE colleges tend to be very loyal once you are there IME. if he has a good report from his alternative level 2, they may well take him onto the over-subscribed level 3 course. you could ask about that.

[fresh]

MRJ it will be restricted during the week, no question. Weekends I shall cut some slack.

[MRJJ007123445667687876]

Fresh
our Ds is virtually addicted to gaming as well. It was always restricted in our house because it is so addictive and now it has been totally banned (with DS's agreement after many many talks) until some of the bad marks in his report has gone (where he can easily be better by working just a bit harder)

My opinion is this: as long as the addictive activity (gaming) is still available you can do what you want - there won't be a turnaround.

Have you thought of convincing/coercing him to give up gaming until he is up to a level that you and him think is realistic to achieve if he tries a bit harder?

Worked very well in our house.

[JeanSeberg]

It's also worth pointing out that GCSEs aren't some kind of finishing line.

Not everyone will reach their full potential at the age of 15/16. Plenty of time for people to develop, mature, increase their interesting in learning and ability to sit exams throughout their life.

[fresh]

Thanks beast. We went to our local college a couple of weeks ago. Although he was a bit quiet in the face of the tutor we spoke to, he says he is keen to go. Unfortunately he didn't think to tell me he was having a low blood sugar moment (diabetic) until after we left which will have contributed to the quietness.

Their L3 course was 3 times oversubscribed last year. The L2 course more than twice oversubscribed. So he's going to need the best grades he can get. He says he's happy to go for Grade D to get on the L2 and if that's what we get then fine. I honestly think that once he's away from the school environment, being a bit more independent and with a fresh start and fresh tutors who've seen all this before, he will engage. It will also help to be somewhere where he isn't younger brother of DS1 who fits the academic mould perfectly.

[Beastofburden]

I am a big fan of FE colleges in this situation. My DD got largely E and F GCSE (she has a disability) but scraped together enough D grades to do a level 2. It was borderline, but they stretched a point. Once she was on a vocational course that was right for her, she did well. Then she took a year out and redid some GCSEs at the same college, and got English and science at grade c. Then she did a level 3 course. Now she has just got a full time, permanent job. If (when) she fails maths again this summer, she can keep on retaking it at evening classes as part of the job. But others on her cour are off to university next.

FE colleges are the business for disengaged kids. One of the "boys" on her GCSE course was 30. He said he had made some poor choices when he was younger; we didn't ask. There was a girl she was at junior school with who was a terror at mainstream school, and got great A levels at FE colleges and is now at Uni. The list of success stories goes on.

I would go there with him for an open evening. He might like the atmosphere. He might then nail some GCSEs. Even if he doesn't quite, it's a very forgiving place, it's all about second chances.

[fresh]

anthropology hobbies? Gaming, mostly strategy games. The IT course is a pragmatic suggestion in the absence of any burning desire of his. In a way it was a starting point for a discussion which he doesn't want to have, to get him to see what needs to happen this year. If a light comes on and he decides to do something else then fine, but we have to start the discussion somewhere.
sash he's already doing just the core subjects then geog, graphic design and product design. These are the only ones with a coursework element available to him, all the rest rely solely on one exam at the end now.

Which course he ends up on, and at what Level, is less of a concern right now. I just need to put in place a mechanism for helping him get the best grades he can. Hopefully as he gains confidence and understanding that will have a knock on effect and he'll come out of himself more. We'll deal with whatever we get next year. I'll let you know how it goes

[anthropology]

fresh, not sure where you live, but Katherine Kindersleys team in London are amazing. They do help teens understand that many dont do well in school, not because they are not clever enough, but because of the way brains are tested at school. The report said that it was vital, she continued in education to a higher level. Schools never picked it up as she , like you say, got by under the radar until she struggled with depression, partly with the strain of working harder than other kids and in some subjects and not doing as well in exams. Having extra time in exams, specialist tutors and support with panic etc, made a huge difference and focussing on subjects she was good at . Alternatively , many great and successful chefs I work with, left school early and at my DDs college, many others have taken the longer route and found their way to higher education. GCSES and their results I feel are less important than decisions made next, which hopefully play to his strengths and give him more confidence. Also post 19, there are other routes into higher education , so don't lose hope. .

[sashh]

Level 2 is GCSE level C or above, Level 1 in GCSE level D-G so he won't be put on a level 2 course.

OK for GCSEs it sounds like he needs exam technique skills, which don't seem to be taught much any more but can make a difference in grades.

If he goes to an FE college without C grades in maths and English language (could he do GCSE English Language and drop the Lit bit?) he will have to do functional skills/key skills or GCSE or an equivalent. One difference at FE colleges is that once the student passes they do not need to attend again and get some free time.

Most FE colleges and quite a few training centres have Level 2 English and Maths courses, one near me does an intensive 2 week course just after GCSE results, it takes grade D students, they do maths am and English pm and then sit the exam and hopefully they then get a C and G Level 2 cert in both.

Is it time to drop or pay less attention to some subjects? I have a personal hate of schools putting students in for 10 subjects at GCSE knowing they will get low grades when the same student restricted to 5 subjects might achieve C grades in them all - but that is off topic and I do know the reasons for it.

[antimatter]

if he says it is "interests" him but is too much work I am not sure how he is going to learn about it

I work in IT and know it is possible to be successful in the field without passing official exams but it needs dedication of his time.
If he likes the idea of working in IT that's a good start. I hope when he goes to college he can find dedicated teacher who will push the right buttons for him.

I reckon you might have suggested something like this: www.codecademy.com/ to him. Good starting point. However codeing requires patience and level of abstraction.

Maybe messing with hardware would be better start for him. However it needs ability to concentrate whch obviously is easier if that was his pasion.

Tbh - it doesn't matter what his passion is - as long as he progresses with it.

Has he got any hobbies he spends time on?

[fresh]

Hi all - sorry, been away all day. antimatter he's interested in both. I'm trying to get him to look at learning to code, but so,far it just sounds like more work to him.
mrj that's pretty much the route I will take. Am prepared to be mother from hell for a while until he knuckles down, and there will be a tutor involved, plus rewards and encouragement.
anthropology I've never heard of that, will look into it although I'm wary of adding another label to him just as he's coming out of dealing with being diabetic. Thanks for the suggestion tho.

[anthropology]

you say he is stubborn, shy, does well in term and panics at exams. Have you thought about getting him a WISC 4 assessment, with an ed psych. this might show you and him, if he has any memory/dyslexia issues (and it will illustrate his strengths) . . If learning issues are indicated, the resulting document could help him get additional support and understanding around critera and he might feel more confident as it will reveal his strengths too. it really helped my DD who is now going to uni to study a subject she loves, despite exam issues . Cost is about 500 pounds, but some dyslexia charities offer bursaries.

[MRJJ007123445667687876]

Fresh
our DS has had bad marks in school - I complained many times about him here on Mumsnet and many many times wanted to give up on him. I would not say we have exactly come out the other side but things are definitely looking up (he is year 10).


What we did?
Nagging, talking sensibly, punishing, bribing, working through a tantrum and repeat, repeat, repeat...

I know, not a popular approach - everybody is looking for the magic wand like a tutor or an amazing teacher. And while I am not against tutoring (Ds had it for several months) I do believe the ongoing (virtually daily) dialogue, the negative consequences and the rewards from us parents is the most decisive thing.

[antimatter]

Which part of computing interests him?
Is it hardware - i.e. - building them or software - programming?

Is he doing anything of it in his spare time?

[mumeeee]

I know taking the longer route has been good for DD3. She would have been no where near ready for university at 18 both academicly and socially. We weren't sure she was ready at 21 but we supported her in her decision to go. She proved us wrong,worked hard and has made lots of friends,

[fresh]

Well that puts a bit more perspective on it, thanks mummeee. I'm beginning to see that the longer route is possible. Actually I think it would be better as the older he gets the better equipped he'll be to deal with coursework and exams.

Thanks MN, I really appreciate all your replies.

[mumeeee]

Well DD3 is 22 has dyspraxia and other learning difficulties. She has just finished her first year at university where she is ding a computer degree. Anyway her GCSE results were bad and she only got one C, She went to college and did a NVQ level 1 in hospitality but was told at the end of the first year she couldn't go on to the Level 2. She then did a foundation course where she studied a variety of subjects which gave her some confidence, At the end of that course she decided to apply for and got into BTECH first Diploma in IT and then went on to do level 2 ( which is now called subsidiary Diploma) and then the Extended Diploma which she got Distinction Merit Merit for. She did functional skills Maths and English alongside these courses. It took her a long time to get to university but she did it so having not good GCSE results is not the end of the road.

[fresh]

Thanks all. LIZS no, no SEN. Diagnosed Type 1 diabetic 2 yrs ago which probably put a dent in concentration for a while, although he deals with it brilliantly. He has always been a child who comes at life sideways however.

I will make a point eleanor of picking up the exam thing - although it is difficult as any mention of them just results in shutdown so I have to find a way to get past that first!

Definitely going for a tutor in Eng and Maths. And talking to the school as well.

[Eleanor02]

Further thought and picking up what others have said.
DS has had a tutor for one of his subjects for the past couple of terms and it's made such a difference. She's patient, thorough and helps him get to the bottom of things. Half the problem was simply not understanding basic concepts - what a difference kind, patient help has made.