13 year old and ear stretchers....help!

[Fragglewump]

Dss is 13 and getting ear stretchers. This is being allowed by his mum. Dh and I are sad and concerned that this will damage not only his ears but future prospects. Are we old farts who need to get a grip? Or is there anything we can and should do? Help!

[Oceansurf]

13?? Oh dear me. Ugh. They are awful at any age imo, but each to their own and all that. But not when he's a child.

[WiddleAndPuke]

God, why do people want this done?? It's absolutely hideous.

I doubt there's much you can do really OP, particularly if his mother is supporting him. Does she have MH problems?

[TeenAndTween]

Against rules of DD's school.

[mrsjay]

DD has streched both her ears I think she went as far as 10mm maybe 8 she is now nearly 21 and her holes went back to normal she did it in her pierced ear I dont think it is a huge deal there is far worse things a 13 yr old can be doing to their body , I think if his mum said yes make sure he doesn't force them through and he has the patience to wait,

[mrsjay]

I doubt there's much you can do really OP, particularly if his mother is supporting him. Does she have MH problems?

oh stop it do you think a parent who allows ear piercin g has MH problems

[Fragglewump]

Hmm sadly dss has inherited his non-existent patience from his dad!!

[mrsjay]

if he is going to do it really quickly tell him his ear lobes might split I know you don't like them and it is ok to disapprove he wants you to disapprove and tut or there would be no reason for him to try and rebel

[Sparklingbrook]

I didn't realise they were reversible, I thought you were stuck with them. I feel a bit better about them now, but I think they are best left until they are older.

They do make me feel a bit funny though.

[mrsjay]

they used to give me the creeps tbh dd would take it out to put another stud thingy it and my insides would churn

[mrsjay]

the studs she wore after streching were covered so you couldnt see through they iyswim

[Sparklingbrook]

YY like that mrsjay-you get used to it presumably?

[mrsjay]

yeah i suppose I was quite glad when she decided to take them out for good though

[Fairylea]

My dh has them. Quite large ones too, in both ears.


He is a university graduate and works in a senior management position in retail for a global company.
He wears a suit and tie every day.

He has never had anyone say anything negative about them except at one interview where they asked if he could wear flesh coloured plugs so they weren't noticeable.

He generally wears wood black plugs and they look quite smart.

However, he now says he wishes he had not done it and is looking into minor surgery (done at piercing studios) to have them sewn up. When done well you can hardly see they were ever stretched.

[DropYourSword]

He'll have to learn patience if he wants to stretch his lobes!

[Primadonnagirl]

Why????????? Each to their own I know..but I'm genuinely perplexed why anybody wants to do this? I'm sorry and know someone is going to say its just like a piercing or a tattoo, but IMO its much more severe than that and not remotely attractive.Im not being judgey.. As I say I am genuinely baffled that anybody looks at them and says ...."Oooh! I want that!" They make me

[Fragglewump]

I suspect primadonnagirl that is exactly why a grumpy teenage boy is attracted to it!

[mrsjay]

dd wore the plugs ( i couldnt remember what they were called before thanks fairy) she got some with designs on them they looked nice it was just the taking in and out that would make me queasy

[pinkyredrose]

widdle Mental health problems? What the fuck are you on about? !

[DownstairsMixUp]

Some really nice replies to this thread

[Fragglewump]

I'm getting the feeling lobe stretchers are like marmite.

[Northernlurker]

Well it doesn't seem like saying 'Over my dead body' will help at all so I think you're best off respecting his choice - even when it's a bit daft. Help him keep it clean and safe and when/if he gives up and it out say nothing at all. Really it's best not to 'see' it all. If you praise it that's encouragement and if you oppose it then that's even more encouragement. Just let it become invisible.

[TheAlyssWithTheMewlingQuim]

The general rule of thumb tends to be don't stretch your ears bigger than your baby finger if you want them to shrink back.

[WiddleAndPuke]

Because I can't believe that a mentally sound adult would go along with a THIRTEEN YEAR OLD CHILD having potentially irreversible, great flappy holes in themselves.

It was just a question. I'm not suggesting that everyone with MH problems would do such a thing, or that everyone with flappy holes has MH problems, or that there's anything wrong with having MH problems etc etc etc.

[nocarsgo]

You have to be VERY VERY slow with lobe stretching, or you risk getting a blowout.

Make sure your DS really does his homework when it comes to stretching slowly and responsibly. Get him to research blowouts, what they look like and how to prevent them.

Sadly I suspect a 13 year old won't be mature enough to do this responsibly but... his ears, his mistakes.

[DownstairsMixUp]

I don't agree with letting a 13 year old do that either but I'd hardly say she had mental health problems. Bit over the top like.