DS(14) and age 18 games are we doing the right thing?

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

DS(14) is not allowed PEGI 18 games. No debate, no discussion. He is allowed age 16 games.

Are we wrong? DS says his friends tease him for not having age 18 games.

[ProtegeMoi]

I know someone who lets a 5 year old play 18 games!

My 8 year old son was at their house playing and came home as he knows he isn't allowed to play / watch these games.

The mum says is not that bad and they know its not real so its ok.

Mine won't play them for a LONG time, if at all. My son has special needs and is influenced easily so I will prevent him playing violent games for as long as I possibly can.

[watchingout]

My DS 13 ordered COD on his own Amazon account I hit the roof when it was delivered and confiscated it. Waste of £25 there and a whipped puppy too.

But... I then researched it in slow time, consulted with some RL friends, and had long talk with DS. He was eventually allowed to use the game, with supervision at first, and with the "gore" turned off. I watched for a few sessions until I fell asleep and he got bored very quickly.

Good lesson for us on communication and boundaries. Not sure it helps you?

[secretscwirrels]

No GTA allowed here and DS1 is 17.
Mine both had COD at 14 and so did their friends. I know this because I checked.
Console in the living room though.
I have no problem with the game, doesn't appeal to me but it seems to let them socialise and let off steam.

[Hattifattner]

Come on, do you really believe any 8y old's parent lets them play Assasins Creed

I know a disturbed 7 yo who stated that the highlight of his weekend was reaching level X of COD. He was in a remedial social group at the time.

I also know a 10yo who plays COD with his dad.

[sashh]

Come on, do you really believe any 8y old's parent lets them play Assasins Creed?

I did know a 12 year old who not only played 18 games but was not allowed to go to bed because his step father was playing the game and needed the 12 yo to show him how to do stuff.

12 yo now an adult and not in contact with sf.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

Thank you 2fedup, I will take a look at that.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

DS and I have chatted again today. I explained that he needs to be able to distinguish reality from the virtual world and that is more important for him than some of his friends. If he does go into the army then in a couple of years he will be training for real.

I think that yesterday was a bit of a glitch, he was tired and had got himself worked into a state. By the end of the evening he had put his games controller down and picked up a guitar and seemed a lot happier in himself.

Many thanks for all the advice and help.

[CandyCrushed]

I am pretty sure different versions of Call Of Duty have different age ratings. Turning off the extreme violence/gore etc is easy to do if you won't but it is still an intense game with lots and lots of first person violence.
The gameplay is very intense and mature and may be 'too much' for younger teens. It is not just the violence and language that is not suitable.

[TheCatInTheHairnet]

I let my DS have COD from 13/14. All his friends had it (and they really did as I checked with their Mums) so it seemed pointless to say no. I have quite strict rules about how much screen time they get, none before homework, etc.

He's now 16 and rarely ays games now. However, the rules will be completely different for DS2 as he is a different kid.

[Ahojj]

No problem - I do love my games but appreciate parents need to be better informed as to quite what their children are up to on the consoles, so would like to help dispel any myths and help inform in an unbiased manner where possible!

If anyone else has questions do feel free to get in touch.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

Thank you Ahojj

[Ahojj]

@Worry - probably on the same level as Casino Royale. I dunno, any film where people get shot to be honest. There's no gutting or body parts, but there is blood that will spray like someone being shot in a film (you know, the explosive squibs that they build into people's costumes). There are not, though, any big pools of blood, closeups of gore or anything gratuitous like that. Language is assorted Fs but nothing worse.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

Sorry, that was the film Casino Royale. I will be honest that I dont actually watch many films!

[Ahojj]

Yes, he could definitely bypass the prostitute stuff. The other stuff is all mission driven, so you are given a mission by other people in order to progress through the game/open up the city etc (the game starts you off on a small island, and unlocks other areas via unblocking the road bridges as you beat various missions), and you encounter, for instance, strip clubs, drug deals etc.

You COULD skip the missions and just drive around for hours on end, but I think that would be a waste of money to be honest (and I think he's fibbing with his intentions!)

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

Ahojj, thank you for that.

To give me some context, how would you compare the violence in CoD to, say, Casino Royale? The language doesnt bother me too much BTW.

[TheWave]

Ahojj and others thanks for info re GTA specifically. My DS says (and he argues quite sensibly about this) that he can bypass those bits and concentrate on the driving which he likes, is that possible?

[basildonbond]

Flatmum - there are definitely parents who let 8 year olds play 18 rated games ... I used to go into the dc's primary to hear children read - I had the same few children for about four years so go to know them pretty well and they would tell me lots of things about their home life - two of them were playing 18 rated games from Y3 onwards :(

[Ahojj]

I will just point out, from having played GTA, that there is a lot of misinformation here. You cannot commit rape. You cannot piss on a policeman.

There is, however, a lot of violence and reference to drugs. You can assault anyone on the street, and you can regain health by sleeping with prostitutes.

It is definitely an 18 and for good reason. The Call of Duty games, not so much. They are violent and have bad language, but you're pretending to be a soldier and shooting others. They're certainly "soft" 18s, compared to GTA. You see the same levels of violence Call of Duty as you do in 15 certificate war films.

I hope this helps and I'm happy to provide any other information. I'm a 28 year old who grew up playing games of various ages and ratings, so can see it from the gamer AND the parent side.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

Thanks Sminko. I think I will let DS stew a bit. He gets himself in a state about this or that obsession. In many ways he is quite sensible but he is also quite sensitive as well (as are many 14 year olds IMO).

[TheHumancatapult]

Candy yup my older two do not like GTA Say so much is wrong with it and that should be banned

and yes ds2 age 16 could explain that its just a game and that its virtual etc about cod so i was happy let him

[SminkoPinko]

lol@ making him watch countryfile.

Our 14 year olds play call of duty. partner says it's not as gratuitous and wrong as many games.

[AfricanExport]

Flatmum...well no, but I asked the mum and the kid has played with his father, mum was not happy!

[CandyCrushed]

In Grand Theft Auto (not sure which one) you can get extra points for pissing on dead policemen. I have no idea why parents think that is an ok thing to have in the house. Even if your DC's are 18. My DC's never play it.

COD is not so bad.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

That is interesting what you say about COD, many thanks to your DSs and you TheHumancatapult. I will discuss COD a bit more with DH and perhaps discuss further with DD's BF. I need to get some more info on disabling graphic content. The problem is that I can see this as a slippery slope.