Mumsnet users share their thoughts about kids and online gaming with Nintendo

[LibbyMumsnet]

This sponsored discussion is now closed

This year, kids are spending more time online for everything from education to catching up with friends. Now that most of the UK is in a second national lockdown, online gaming is set to become more popular. With this in mind, Nintendo would like to hear your thoughts on the benefits of online gaming, and any concerns you have.

Here’s what Nintendo has to say: “Keeping an eye on screen time, ensuring your child is playing games appropriate for their age and only with friends that they know are all challenges that parents face in the modern world. That’s why Nintendo created the Nintendo Parental Controls app, a mobile app that links to the Nintendo Switch and helps you manage and control these at your fingertips. Giving you peace of mind so you can spend less time worrying and more time having fun.”

Are you worried your child is playing video games too much? Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing? Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while? Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation? Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?

Share your thoughts on the thread below to be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £100 voucher for the store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck!

MNHQ

Insight Terms and Conditions apply

Answers...
Are you worried your child is playing video games too much?
Yes, he'd play every waking hour given the chance. That and YouTube videos on how to play the bleeping games.

Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing?
Not as such, because DH and I block anything we are concerned about and vet everything DS wants. It's purely screen time and not doing other stuff like exercise or homework!!

Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while?
We set timers for breaks or it doesn't happen. Even with timers it sometimes doesn't happen. There have been times I've been tempted to turn off the router. The problem I have is that DH is a gamer... so I usually leave them to it and do something else. Like read, or bake, or go for a run.

Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation?
Yes. We use Discord and DS talks to all his schoolfriends on it as they play the games together! We control the local server so only known people can be on it, reducing any risks of strangers and the like.

Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?
DH certainly does! Last thing on the planet I'd want to do for fun!

My biggest concern is peer pressure.
LOTS of kids at primary are playing 12+, and a number are playing older rated games. How do Nintendo feel when young kids play their games designed for adults?

Before lockdown DD didn't do any gaming, nor did she particularly want to. She then discovered online gaming with some school friends which was a great way to stay in touch and spend time together. I do worry about how addictive it is though, we limit the amount of time she can spend on it but even so find that she can become obsessed. I can see how easily it would become a real problem and have to spend far too much time monitoring what she's doing.

Are you worried your child is playing video games too much?
A little more than usual but with Covid and isolation brings exceptional circumstances.
Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing?
We have 100% control over the games our children play and would not let them play anything that we feel is unsuitable irrespective of any peer pressure.

Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while?
We place parental controls on games and automatic switch off. The children are then encouraged to get involved in some form of play/arts/craft/board games.

Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation?
I believe there is a place for online gaming and playing with friends. This is particularly useful during isolation when children cannot physically see their friends. However this must be carefully managed.

Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?
We have purchased family friendly games that we can play together and the children alternate between playing their own choice and then playing a family friendly game

Am very concerned about length of time DC2 spends playing games. He has no cut off and will play all day if left to it. When we prise him off he has no idea what to do. Partly this is result of Covid and not much schoolwork whilst I had to work full time, he just retreated online and would prefer that to anything else. I really hate it, would love him to be out, or reading, or hanging out with real friends

Are you worried your child is playing video games too much?
Not really as we monitor how long they play their games for

Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing?
I know exactly what they're playing but I do worry who's playing online with them!

Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while?
Luckily they get bored after an hour anyway and get a book, or start writing/drawing/playing the piano. I'm glad they have some variety to balance it out.

Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation?
I think it really helped during lockdown. They didn't get to see their friends but they were still connected to them. It made a big difference.

Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?
I just can't enjoy games myself, I have quite a short attention span! I'm sure there must be a game out there that I'd enjoy I just haven't found it yet. DH however really enjoys playing online with them and they get quite competitive!

Whilst I'm pleased my son can interact with his friends online in ways he can't in person at the moment, I do worry he spends too much tme online, and also about what he might see there.

My children are 10 and 8. The 10yo (boy) has always massively been into gaming and I think it helps his wild imaginative mind that actually then helps with his offline playing I.e with his toys.

I limit screen time and they know the set hours in any given day when they’re allowed on their games. I do play some of the games with them, I find them fun too! I definitely think it helps with the bond between us as I can see what he’s playing, understand when he talks about them, even help him along in the game if he gets stuck.

Online gaming has helped my son keep connected with his friends too, they’re at the age where they’re learning how to chat to each other through games and it’s a great way to keep in touch during lockdowns.

As with most things, it’s great in moderation and certainly helps the lockdown boredom and gives me 5 minutes peace!

Definite concern here - my DS loves playing constructive, collaborative games which isn't a problem in itself but I worry hugely about what he could be exposed to. Plus his behaviour is always grizzly after he plays!

Me and my partner are both avid gamers and we both have done memories of gaming as kids. We want our children to have those similar experiences, I even have a book of the top 100 games for children to play with the game history too. Games can be a super useful and fun educational tool, it's taught my 5 year old hand eye coordination which has in turn helped with playing with more fiddly toys, lego building etc. It's helped him to learn about so many different things, he likes to be challenged and to figure out puzzles, it's taught him to be more patient and to keep trying if he gets stuck. It's also a great bonding activity, we can play as a family and have lots of fun.

We make sure that he doesn't play on video games for too long, he has a timer so he is only allowed to play for a certain time in the day. He still plays a lot with physical toys, cars, lego, puzzles, and books. He LOVES the outdoors, he's a very active child and has a ton of energy. Because we both play video games we are aware of which games are suitable for him, he has his own folder of games he knows he can play.

Are you worried your child is playing video games too much?

My youngest child is 14 and only really plays on the Nintendo Switch. She does go through phases where she will play it for several hours on two or three consecutive days but it is very periodic, so I'm not too worried. Since going back to school in September, I have only seen her playing on her Switch a handful of times.

Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing?

The games my daughter tends to play are those based on Super Mario. I feel they are age appropriate, although I encourage her to stop playing when she begins to get really frustrated about not progressing to the next level. I know there is one online game she does play with people she doesn't know - I would be concerned if she was just randomly playing online with people she doesn't know and opening hersulf up to the danger of becoming friends with someone unknown, however, the particular game she plays online is one she tends to play alongside her 21 year old sister. They each use their own devices but tell one another bits of information and I know my elder daughter would tell me if my 14 year old was befriending anyone.

Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while?

Whilst I have never had to worry too much about the amount of time my daughter spends playing, I do know that it is often more of an issue with boys rather than girls, and I'm not meaning to be stereotypical. My son is 23 and, even now, if he has a new game delivered, he will ask me to put the disc into his PS4 so that it is downloaded and ready to play when he gets home from work. He isn't as bad now, but as a teenager I did worry about how much he played games as he was holed up in his bedroom and didn't want to come down to eat or anything, whereas my daughter likes having company and is easily persuaded to do something else.

Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation?

I felt that my daughter, on the whole, was more relaxed when she was able to join in online gaming. One of the advantages I found was that she was happy to cast a game to the TV, so I could see exactly what was going on. As a distraction at a worrying time, there were definitely some benefits for my daughter as she seemed to worry less if she had spent time online gaming.

Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?

I have a disability and so find holding and wielding a controller too much. However, during the summer holidays when we couldn't go on holiday and had all been home for some time, my 14 year old and 21 year old daughters would often play together and join forces in online gaming, trying to work together to beat other players. As the pair of them usually try to wind one another up and annoy one another, it was nice to see them bonding over the game. At one point, my husband and two daughters all joined forces to play online and they spent quite a long period of time playing together. I was happy to find that they were doing something together and nobody was arguing or complaining. We did also alternate with playing board games, so it wasn't all about online gaming.

I do think it can be challenging to stay on top of the content and time limits, we have some firm rules to help this, like no gaming in bedrooms only in the lounge, no screens after dinner time etc. As my son is getting older (now 10) I’m finding his friends talk and play games that I do t consider appropriate for my own children. I check our reviews before I buy a game and I also watch them play the first few times as often they don’t have any idea of the dangers. I don’t like games where they have contact with other players for chat and we often have chats about why these aren’t appropriate for them. I would like to be able to have more control snd will be looking into your switch parent controls for when we invest in a new console.

I’m not concerned about how long they spend gaming as we set time limits and they have other interests. During lockdown it was the main way they kept in touch with friends. I am concerned though about peer pressure to play age inappropriate games such as GTA

Very concerned! If i let my children they would be playing video games / or watching youtube videos of games all day long! It is so hard to deal with peer pressure when it comes to what games they want to play
I am the worst mum in the world according to mine as I won't let my son play fortnite just yet :(

We have the switch and love that we can set limits

Are you worried your child is playing video games too much?
It’s quite difficult to engage my son in activities other than video games as that is his passion and he enjoys making gaming YouTube videos also. We do currently use the Nintendo Parental Controls on his switch to try and set time limits around game time - particularly over the weekend.

Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing?
My husband is also a gamer and therefore he is good at suggesting age appropriate games, such as Minecraft, Mario, Yoshi and Kirby. He has asked to play other games, such as Fortnite but at 7, I think he’s too young.

Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while?
Yes, we can always encourage him away with a family movie or baking but I’d also like him to engage with other fun things, such as family board games.

Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation?
Yes, during lockdown (whilst we were shielding), we were able to mix ‘traditional’ schooling with more fun elements such as educational games and apps.

Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?
My son is amazed how good I am at Mario Kart but I’ve been playing for years! We also recently completed New Super Mario Bros U Deluxe which we really enjoyed together.

Between my son and husband, gaming has to be embraced in this household!

I used to restrict screen time more than I do currently. As long as the children have done other things they need to- homework etc, I don’t mind a couple of hours on a screen for them.

We oversee what they play on, so I’m not worried about that. And they don’t contact other people through games either.

Overall, it’s a handy way to occupy each child on something different at the same time (while I get on with something else usually!)

My DD goes online quite alot. She plays with friends and we cant meet up in person is a good way of keeping in touch with them.

From a slightly different perspective: my son (now 30+ ) began with sonic the hedgehog years ago when the computers were really slow , he was given various consoles over the years and played maybe 6 or 7 hours at weekends.
After studying English at Uni he told us that he wanted to make a career out of his hobby . Since then he has progressed from writing short pieces to editing the major magazines and is now in a senior very well paid creative role.
I wouldn't like to say that everyone can do this and I don't like seeing children and teens sitting in a group but all just staring at their screens but the world is a weird place right now and whatever helps them either escape or cope would be okay with me.

I personally feel that at the age of just 3, computer games are unnecessary distractions from real playing and imagination. I think basic IT skills are important to keep up with modern life but no point introducing technology for technology's sake. The gaming systems are only invented to make money and children were fine without them.

Are you worried your child is playing video games too much?
sometimes but we do keep an eye and make sure he does other activities that are not screen related
Or perhaps you're concerned about the types of games they’re playing?
no. he only plays games that are age appropriate .
Maybe you have thoughts on how to encourage them to do other things if they’ve been playing for a while?
he is very good at coming off gaming when we tell him too
Could online gaming offer some benefits for children at a time of social isolation?
yes, they can chat to their friends on it
Maybe you enjoy playing with them and consider it an opportunity to bond as a family?
he plays alone but we play board games as a family

My older boys are 25 and 23 and I did worry that ds1 spent too much time playing games. Ds2 wasn’t so interested. I only allowed games that were suitable for their age and there wasn’t really the same opportunity for online gaming but I did restrict their gaming time. Strangely, it’s ds2 who has the degree in computer science and now works in app development. The both game in their spare time. Ds3 (14) plays online with his friends but asks if certain games are ok before he joins them. I don’t restrict his time or worry about him. He is quite sensible and it’s a good social activity for him. He does his school work, homework, music practice without being asked so his spare time is his own. He plans to go into app development too.

My son and I have recently started playing an online game together. It's enormous fun and it's lovely being able to enjoy an activity together.

Some of his friends also play this game online too, which helped a lot during the first lockdown in reducing his feelings of isolation.

I had noticed that he gets a bit grumpy in the mornings when he wants to game instead of getting ready for school. But I've dealt with that by being very clear about managing his game time, ensuring there are boundaries between game time and dinner/bed time and making sure he understands that gaming time is a reward for good behaviour, rather than the other way round!

My ds has started regulating himself which is brilliant. He recognises when he has been on too long and comes down for family time. Perfect!

Online gaming has certainly had a positive effect on social life during lockdowns as it meant the children (boys aged 8 and 10) could play with their classmates-with a video call running alongside to communicate.
Generally speaking however it is always difficult to get them to stop so if games were built to have a gentle “come off” time where for example the little people in the game get tired after a certain time and need a rest, it would be great.
Switch is great for cooperative games, it is why we bought it instead of other equivalents. We also love the Wii balance board which the grandparents have and would love it if it were available for the Switch as it would really help with exercise when the weather is bad or when it is dark (which is a lot of the year in England).

My son loves gaming and would play Roblox or games on the Nintendo Switch all day if we let him. As a parent it is hard to get the balance right between screen time and other activities but I think we manage well. Through lockdown, he was able to catch up with friends through gaming after completing his school work and other activities. We also like playing as a family when we get the time.