Tell us about the first time you let your child go somewhere on their own - £300 voucher to be won NOW CLOSED

[PoppyMumsnet]

It can be a big deal when your child first makes a trip on their own - whether it's to the corner shop, across the road to a friend or the playground, or maybe up to school without you for the first time. Churchill Insurance would like to hear about your experiences of the first time you let your child go somewhere on their own. Tell us where they went, how old they were and how you felt about letting them go. Did you set out any ground rules about road safety or perhaps sticking to an agreed route? Did it all go according to plan? With the school holidays coming up, your DC might be waiting to do their first solo trip then. Where are they planning to go and how do you feel about it?

Please share your stories with Churchill Insurance below. All MNers who post on this thread will be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £300 Love2Shop voucher.

Standard Insight T&Cs apply

Thanks, and good luck!

MNHQ

[marshgirl]

My daughter was 10years old (year 6) , we let her go up the town with her friends.
She had a phone and we kept in contact constantly but we still worried until she came home.

[ladygoingGaga]

My DS was 8, we live in a village with the local green across a quiet 20mph road.
In my view kids are safer in pairs, anymore and they can get split, but a pair means they stick together.
So I let him go with his best friend to the green, I also insisted they take a simple Walkie Talkie, and that they called me when stood at the road, I would get them to talk me through them crossing.
I could then ask them if they were okay, and got them to call me up when crossing the road on way back over too.
Walkie Talkie gave him and me confidence. Best twenty quid I've ever spent.

[sadiewoohoo]

I was terrible as far as letting mine play out etc. I worried constantly if they played out and would much rather let them have a friend round to the house to play. They were about 8 when I first let them play outside

[thesockgap]

The first time any of my kids went anywhere unaccompanied was when I let my eldest son, then 9, walk the 2 minute walk up our road and round the corner to Cubs! I was a nervous wreck and stood on the step watching him all the way up the road. He might as well have been going on a 10 mile journey!
My youngest is 9 now and to be honest hasn't been anywhere alone, but I do sometimes let him go to the shop or the park with his 12 year old brother.

[loubymain]

I let my eldest go to town on her own. Was very nerve racking for me

[ButterflyOfFreedom]

My DC are 3 and 1 so I've not let them go anywhere on their own yet but I do try to encourage them to be a little independent and a little worldly wise (!) - getting them to help me with shopping, order their own food in a restaurant, hand over the parcel in the Post Office...

I think maybe by the time they are 6 or 7 I'll let them walk down the road to a friends house or something though I'll be watching!

[canary1]

My eldest is nearly 10. Never left him go anywhere until youngest arrived earlier this year. This meant with baby needing feeding and oldest two needing to buy treats for a day at camp, I was forced to park outside the shop and let this buy things for themselves ( middle child is age 7) . I realised I should have let then take this safe step at an earlier stage to promote their independence, confidence and just their general skills! Now I do this regularly. I then started to leave oldest at home briefly while I went to post a letter/ pick middle child up just a few mins away. All was well, until there was a small music festival in field beyond our garden. In my 15 min absence he got out the window, climbed over the fence, looked around and luckily could climb back again!!!! Then told me what he had done, and recommended we all go as it was ' pretty good fun there and you can get ice creams'!!!!! So I guess my almost 10 year old has been to a music festival by himself, very briefly! I needed wine after that:)

[WowOoo]

The first time my eldest son went to buy something by himself was a funny one. He rushed out without taking his change when he saw his friend.
The shopkeeper came running after him.
We HAD gone through all the steps. He didn't listen to his parents, but he listened to her when she asked why he wanted to give her all his money for a £1 ice lolly.

[YesThisIsMe]

This isn't me parenting my DC, but my mother parenting me. When I was 13 we moved to London and when I turned 14 my mum let me take my allowance and go on the bus to the shops in Hammersmith for the first time. No mobile phones in those days of course. When my DF got home from work, he said, as usual, "so what have you all been up to today". Younger DB replied "Unikitty went on the bus to Hammersmith and Mummy paced up and down and worried." Pretty much sums it up.

DD now gets the tube to school. We gradually moved from commuting in together door to door, to me leaving her at her tube station to make her own way to school, to me getting off at my stop and letting her take one further stop, to her going on her own if I'm off work, to her occasionally going in on her own and locking the house up behind her if she has a late start.

[WilfSell]

Ds 1 and 2, both allowed to play on the green near our house from about age 6. In our old house, we overlooked it and he had lots of friends living in neighbouring houses so there was always a friendly parent nearby. We then moved up the road and now the green is round the corner. DS2 never really fancied it as hardly anyone to play with now and DS3 hasn't been out there on the green at all as him and DS2 play in the garden mostly.

Both DS1 and 2 have been allowed or sent on errands down to the local shop, about 5 mins away, only one road to cross which is not busy. This happened from about 8-9 I think. DS3 is 8 and haven't allowed him on his own yet but probably soon.

DS2 went into town on the bus to meet friends from about 13-14 but we often picked him up, and now he's 17, it's mostly him begging us for a lift at midnight and us going 'no get a bloody taxi or sleep at a friend's house' etc..

DS2 is the least attentive to cars or danger or anything really: he's the one who I need to pin down the most about rules, guidelines, but he's now (at 11 and about to go to high school) allowed much more free reign. He will have a mobile imminently and at least then be allowed to tell the time and call us if he's in difficulties!

But everytime a new boundary is crossed, a new freedom earned, I'm a wreck but recognise it is good for them. And they are also clear it is a privilege: if they're later than they say etc, then it gets revoked for a bit!

[JoJoBaldwin]

My 8 year old DD is just starting to want a little independence,and I want to help her with that but it's difficult!

So far I have allowed her to cross roads on her own (that I deem "safe" roads while I hang back but near enough to yell at her if she hasn't spotted a car).

She has tennis at a local club once a week and likes to have an icecream after while wandering around with her friend out of sight in the gardens. These little occasions give her that feeling of independence and get me used to having her out of my sight without freaking out.

I'm not sure how I will feel about letting her go to the corner shop though! I'm sure she is mature enough to do so, but my problem is the fear factor of dodgy people about.

[BananaChew]

My son (9) started walking to school on his own this year - it's 1km with a couple of busy roads and I was bricking it! He's been so responsible though, it's amazing to see him seek and thrive on his new-found independence.

[badgermum]

My son is now 10 and this is the first school holidays where I have let him got to the local park with his friend on their own, they are given strict instructions on what direction to go and what time they have to be back by but i do tend to spend the whole time worrying

[Gazelda]

I haven't yet, DD is 8. She'd have to cross a busy road near a blind bend to get to the park, cross several roads to get to the village, or several busy roads to get to school.
I've realised reading this thread though that she's more than old enough to walk a bit ahead of me and cross roads without holding my hand. Baby steps!

[ThatGingerOne]

I haven't got kids but I remember the first time my mum let me go out alone. I was 12 and got the bus into town with a friend. We stood at the bus stop and watched as the No.14 drove right past us without stopping. We didn't know we had to put our hand out to stop it!

[Pam100127]

When my daughter was 11, last year in Primary School, she went into town with a group of friends. I gave her and friends a lift in and another parent collected them. I gave strict instructions about staying together and putting her phone in her pocket when crossing the road so that she could give full attention to crossing. I also warned her, in a complete contradiction to staying together, that if anyone was misbehaving, suggesting doing something 'illegal' she was to go into a toilet and phone me. It all went to plan, no problems at all and she loved it.

[bletheringboys]

I let my then 5 year old out to the park on his own a few years back now and I was so worried, I may as well have gone with him! I stood at the window watching him (it was only downstairs!) and his little brother was desperate to go too, so I put up with a tantrum from him for about...ooo...10 mins and then sent him out too! He was 3!
They didn't quite play without reservation - they knew it was a big deal. They were back and forth to the house the whole time asking for confirmation of various rules.
We moved house soon after that to a country cottage on a 60mph road. They're a wee bit older now and we happily walk up and down to the park together - might be a while before I trust them (and the crazy fast cars) to go to the park on their own now!

[sofieellis]

We lived in quite a scary neighbourhood when my kids were little, so I was scared to let them out of my sight. We moved to a safer area when my twins were 10 and my youngest was 5 and this was the first time they were allowed to play out unsupervised, as long as they all stayed together. Prior to this, any socialising they did was supervised by myself or other parents.

I think every new thing they do themselves is worrying, my eldest two have been at uni for 2 years and I still worry myself stupid about them!

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

When ds1 was about 7, I let him walk home from Cubs on his own. The hall was just at the other end of our road, 5 minutes walk away, and he wouldn't have to cross the road until he was opposite our house, and I was going to watch for him, no go out to see him across.

Only I got the finish time wrong - it finished 30 minutes later than I thought, which meant I panicked, because he didn't get home when I expected him, and ran up the road to look for him and found Cubs still going on.

[Whyisitsodifficult]

He was 9 when he first walked to school without me. He did walk with a friend and the walk is not near any roads, I then follow the same path 5 minutes later to take my youngest to school so if he was messing about i would have known! It is hard to let them do it but it's your job as a parent to teach them independence.

[TutanKaDashian]

The first time my DS went out alone was to the local shop. It was on the same side of the road as our house and only a minute's walk away. We used to go in there all the time so we knew the owner. He was 9 the first time he went on his own. He has strict instructions to go, buy the milk, and get home as soon as possible. I was really worried the whole time he was gone but we'd had the conversation about strangers and roads etc so he was fine. He's now 13 and goes out regularly, taking his phone with him.

[notarehearsal]

My son was about 8 and id given permission for him and his little friend to walk to the local garage for a hot chocolate. We lived in an amazing and busy cathedral city in the south east. Rather than walk just to the garage they decided to walk the mile into the city, go into a grand cafe, sit down and order two hot chocolates. Son informed me afterward that he'd even left a tip! He was EIGHT! They then walked home beaming while the other boy's mother and I were quietly freaking. What a boy!

[krankers1982]

Letting my daughter go to the shop which is litterally round the corner and up the road was a nightmare she was 7 and i was paceing the house till she got back she was gone for ages just as i was about to go out she came strutting in all proud with her bag of sweets i took a massive deep breath and sigh of relive i asked why she was so long she said ive only been like 5 minutes mam i couldnt decided what sweets to get lol

[JustineBMumsnet]

Thanks everyone for posting on the thread!

The winner of the prize draw is iwasyoungonce

[angiehoggett]

letting them walk to school from the grandparents which was only a five minutes walk but still a responsibility for them