DD with autism leaving college

[Glenmuir24]

Hi,

My daughter was diagnosed with ASD at the age of 17. She struggled to attend school (less than 50%) but left with 8s and 9s in all subjects at GCSE She then started college and it was really positive - she attended and made a group.ofmfriends and seemed to be flying.

She has gender identity issues and asked for an asd assessment, which I paid for. Since the diagnosis everything seems to have fallen apart. She struggled to attend college, becoming distraught on leaving the house.

She hasn't got an ehcp bit the college put in lots of support (eventually) but because she had missed so much she still struggled to attend lessons despite a 1:1 support worker. She instead would work in a quiet room with her support worker.

The college have now said that they're concerned for her wellbeing and lack of attendance in lessons and that to continue the a-levels she has to attend lessons. She feels that she will be unable to.do that. The college has said they can't facilitate streamed lessons ( so that she can attend the lessons virtually) and that either attending or stopping the courses are the only two options.

She is devastated and feels like a failure. My partner has said that she needs to get a job as having a teenager in the house doing nothing is not an option. I just see my little.girl.struggling with so much and I don't know what to do to help.

How is she doing academically at college. If she is still achieving in her subjects could the college review it. They say they are concerned about her wellbeing but they are pushing her into a situation which is worse for her.

Has she had any mental health support? If she had a private diagnosis there might not have been the same after support.

I know online A levels are available but you have to pay to do them. It might be a good option for your daughter though given how well she did at GCSE.

Your partner sounds extremely unhelpful. How can she get a job if she is extremely distressed about leaving the house.

Request an EHCNA. On their website, IPSEA has a model letter you can use.

We had pretty much the same. We have now got an EHCP (after much battling) and she now does just 1 A Level.
She still struggles going into college and I had a meeting with Nisai today which would allow her to do A Levels online.

I am maybe an odds with above replies but mine achieved excellent results at gcse, mostly 9’s- then was totally overwhelmed at a levels despite support from college. She left prematurely got a job , and is doing well at it. This helps self esteem and although i worry about the lack of A levels she needs to feel that she can do something well and she can return to education in some form hopefully. The school issue was becoming too stressful for her and in turn all the family. I agree with your husband, doing nothing is unacceptable but school isn’t the only option

For the content where she's attended she's getting over 90% in assessments. There's no concerns about her capacity to achieve. But where she's not attended her confidence is so low she won't even attempt the questions.

My partner loves her, but he is very traditional. I sort of agree that it bot good for her to stay on bed doing nothing as it adds to her avoidance and depression, but I am worried about how she would access a work environment.

If she's not attending college would an ehcp benefit her?

That's encouraging to hear. Has she had any problems accessing a work environment. My daughter seems to be more anxious around people her own age - she comes I to work with me occasionally and seems more at ease.

When we first met with the college they spoke a outnresitting the second year. They are now saying that that isn't an option.

Would an ehcp help.if she wasn't in education?

An EHCP can still be of use even if DD can’t attend the current college.

She has different problems to your DD as she has ADHD but similar college problem. She looked on Indeed, got a job quite easily and has kept it for over 6 months. Is attempting and online A level but that is not her priority at the moment. ND teens, especially high achievers, burn out and formal education didn’t work for her and her mental health was shot. Maybe your daughter could look at an apprenticeship or just take a year out and work - cafe anything to help with esteem. If she is better with older people she will in time grown into herself. The school/college years are tough