adult DSD - Long term planning for her retirement

[itmar1234]

Dear Everyone,

I would love some advice about long-term planning DSD - We are all getting older and arent able to support her as we once did.

DSD has mild learning disability - not enought to qualify for any additional support but enough to make her vulnerable and make life difficult for her. She has a job and her own house. She lives on the opposite side of the country and it is more and more difficult for us to go up and visit her. Her house is filthy - dogs and cats - and she is increasingly lonely. She is known to social services and possibly uses support services in the local area. It is difficult to know what support she has as she is private and wont tell us much.

We are starting to think about her how her life will be when we are not able to support her. The worry is that without us she will spiral out of control. Ideally we would like her to be in some form of supported housing.

Someone advised us to phone up social services and ask them about what they could do. The issue is that, due to privacy issues, they wouldnt be able to even tell us if she has a social worker.

Is anyone aware of any services that could give us advice that aren't limited to those with a diagnosed learning disability? We accept that the house will be sold to pay for any care requrements she may have. We have had a look at the large ones, Mind, Mencap, but there may be smaller more specialist ones out there.
Also are there any specialist supported retirement housing facilities out there for people with mild learning disabilities? I would worry about her going into a standard retirment home as the residents could be not kind - we've had some issues with other family members being bulled by residents in retirement homes.

I think we are at the start of a long and complicated journey and any advice would be really appreciated. Any decisions that are made, will be hers to make, but it would be important to us that we know of all the options open to her so we can advise her.

[SearchingForSolitude]

As well as Mind and Mencap, you could look at Scope.

If DSD is known to social care, has she had a care assessment? If not, it is worth asking if DSD will agree to requesting one. That would be the first step to looking at supported living. If DSD has capacity you can’t force her though.