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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

SN children

Are we not allowed a sense of humour when it comes to our kids?

27 replies

LoveBuckets · 04/08/2009 12:47

Was gobsmacked when a family friend shut his eyes and shook his head at some of my jokes when he visited. I think he was like it because he works in SN playwork - he was really quite up himself and so jargon-brainwashed that he had lost all sense of humour.

FGS If I can't take the p*ss out of my own kids (any of them) then where is the fun in being a parent?

Has anyone else come up against horror at your coping methods?

OP posts:

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Webme1 · 15/08/2009 11:46

Laughter is one of life's best therapies and is the best medicine in most situations.

The ability to laugh is healthy and without a sense of humour life would be exceedingly dull.

Of course, we will occasionally find some amusement in people around us and as long as they are able to enjoy our amusement, where is the harm?

As for humour as a coping mechanism - it is essential and can spread laughter and good humour to all those around you.

When a parent has a good and appropriate sense of humour, they can help their children to have one too and help them to build up a healthy coping mechanism.

Humour can be a bonding element in relationships. The ability to laugh at oneself and find humour in certain situations is something that people warm to.

I worked with a man who had cerebal palsy, a very personable and good humoured chap who's legs were misaligned. One lunchtime he was leaving work to join some colleagues in the pub. As he was leaving he said

"You'll know if I've had too much to drink - I will come back walking straight".

mysonben · 06/08/2009 01:03

Dh and i always have a laugh when ds (asd) starts giggling and laughting his head off for...no apparent reason
Only him knows what is making him laugh and he 's not telling, but he is so funny to watch and his laughter is so contagious, but my sister who was visiting a few months ago (just before his verbal asd dx)lifted her eyebrows and said "is he normal?... you shouldn't laugh about it!"
Why shouldn't i laugh at my ds 's funny quirky ways

LoveBuckets · 05/08/2009 22:46

I think it comes with the SN training - they are so frightened of being offensive that they have to switch their own senses of humour off. Which makes sense I guess. Plus this guy doesn't actually spend time with the parents so the kids are probably up on a pedestal to him. Which is nice for them I guess, sign of the times and all that.

I can't bear the word 'special' though, it's so sad-sounding - all my kids are special but only one of them is peculiar.

How can you not laugh at the little boy who shouting "3! 1! 4! 2! 4! 4! 4!" when he's cross? Counting wrong on purpose is a great way to show the universe what he thinks of it.

OP posts:

LoveBuckets · 05/08/2009 22:46

I think it comes with the SN training - they are so frightened of being offensive that they have to switch their own senses of humour off. Which makes sense I guess. Plus this guy doesn't actually spend time with the parents so the kids are probably up on a pedestal to him. Which is nice for them I guess, sign of the times and all that.

I can't bear the word 'special' though, it's so sad-sounding - all my kids are special but only one of them is peculiar.

How can you not laugh at the little boy who shouting "3! 1! 4! 2! 4! 4! 4!" when he's cross? Counting wrong on purpose is a great way to show the universe what he thinks of it.

OP posts:

porgie · 05/08/2009 12:37

we bought ds1, ASD, a Forrest Gump t shirt from florida, before he was diagnosed, that says " my momma thinks i'm special".

Agonised over whether to let him wear it, now we send him to nursery in it! Have had a few tuts from friends though!

We are politically incorrect at home and agree that you have to be able to laugh, especially when you are cleaning shit from the walls, carpet, curtains.....

sarah293 · 05/08/2009 10:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

glitteryb6 · 04/08/2009 21:37

like the sound of that!

5inthebed · 04/08/2009 21:16

An old school friend was gobsmacked when I introduced DS2 to her as "my little weirdo".

I think you need to have a sense of humour about these things, otherwise you'd cry.

Glitter, I love that t-shirt! DS1 (NT) has one that says "sorry I can't help you, I'm stuck on the couch". Would be great for your ds when he is sitting in his lounger at home

glitteryb6 · 04/08/2009 21:02

oops!

www.twistedtwee.co.uk/the-modern-child-unfriendly-alphabet-c-31.html

glitteryb6 · 04/08/2009 21:01

Feeling better, check out these tshirts!

www.twistedtwee.co.uk/the-modern-child-unfriendly-alphabet-c-31.html

siblingrivalry · 04/08/2009 20:41

We also laugh at dd's 'aspieness'. We have to, or we would go mad!
There does seem to be a kind of ridiculous taboo about it, though - usually from parents whose children are NT.

PMSL at Deeeja's ds making notes about the neighbours

I'm wracking my brains for examples of when dh and I laugh, but can't think of any - apart from when she does her stimming (running in a circle and hand-flapping) in the playroom. The dog's bed is in there and she is guaranteed to come slinking into the living room to get some peace when dd starts.

HecatesTwopenceworth · 04/08/2009 20:29

"bless him" gawd I hate that! (well, unless it's the vicar, obviously! )

And I had a bloke from the council in my living room the other day who was telling me not to worry, that children like mine all had a special skill, like maths or drawing.

I nodded politely then pissed myself laughing after he'd gone.

bless him.

feelingbetter · 04/08/2009 20:26

Glittery, you must lead me to your T-shirt supplier!

feelingbetter · 04/08/2009 20:25

Yes, our burdens children are to be looked at with fawning eyes and pitied, usually accompanied by an 'awwwwww, bless him/God love him' and a sorrowful shake of the head.

If only they knew how much fun we have....

jemmm · 04/08/2009 20:13

Recently introduced a mum at a playgroup to the twins - and said "Yes that's DS over there..." - DS hurtles towards craft table - "...he has autism..." - DS dives for crayons - "...which is why he's eating the crayons rather than drawing with them..." - I got the stoniest look - and you do kind of think - no, he's my son, it's a joke - what do you want me to do?!?

You're right Cybersepharim - we are supposed to wear sackcloth aren't we.

And what's annoying is - it's all about them - they haven't experienced it, so they think it's the worst thing that could ever happen, and therefore do the "serious" thing - but we're all dealing with it - daily.

Sorry... mini-rant

chegirl · 04/08/2009 20:07

My DD had cancer. We got a shed load of s at our sense of humour!

I work with SN in playwork and I would NEVER at a parent making 'inappropriate' comments about their child. I wouldnt make them, thats not my place but how is it up to me to judge?

I am suprised tbh. Is he new at the job?

HecatesTwopenceworth · 04/08/2009 20:02

oh, also, have you noticed that it is mainly people without children with sn that are the most uptight and easily offended about it? What's that about? [boggle]

HecatesTwopenceworth · 04/08/2009 20:01

bugger what anyone else thinks! You need a sense of humour or you'd go stark staring bonkers!

I can't tell you some of the things we laugh about or the snotty lot would be outraged!

drlove8 · 04/08/2009 19:57

pmsl @ Phoenix 's ds's L plates ! and t-shirt! fantastic

cyberseraphim · 04/08/2009 14:36

It is all supposed to sackcloth and ashes isn't it. It seems to really offend some that you could be having a nice life.

Phoenix4725 · 04/08/2009 14:10

ds has tshirt that says and you think I got problems

Greensleeves · 04/08/2009 14:10

I am constantly doubled up with laughter at my ds1's Aspieness

so is his dad, and his teacher

I haven't laughed so much since I left school

and I make no apologies for it - it's FUNNY and he is adorable

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Phoenix4725 · 04/08/2009 14:08

Ds is sporting L plates on his wheelchair not sure who thats for him as hes learning to self propel or me with my steering when pushing him

LoveBuckets · 04/08/2009 13:30

PMSL Glittery. Get some cheapy t-shirts and fabric pens and make your own.

Do they really think we could have got through the last X years without being able to laugh at our kids' conditions?

OP posts:

drlove8 · 04/08/2009 13:23

lol glittery pmsl - think that would be better on my teenagers!

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