How can I help my child hold a pen properly?

[ChristmasSeacow]

Hi, I have a 4-yr old with ASD and hypermobility and a current obsession with letters! He has never really been interested in mark making before (he can't draw anything recognisable) but now he is trying to write. However, he gets very frustrated and upset when the letters don't go right!

He only has a fist grip and I don't think his writing will improve until he has a proper pen grip. I have tried chunkier pens and chunky pencils with a triangular profile but he still grips them in his fist. He doesn't really like to take advice /direction!

He is left handed and I am not, which isn't helping me to help him as I am rubbish with my left hand.

Any ideas /tricks?

Many thanks.

[QueenOfTheCatBastards]

Simple things that helped us were using fingers to write in sand or sugar on a tray, and doing lots of dough disco.

There's been some fab advice on here though.

Wishing you luck.

[Moonandstarsandback]

Had to look that up! That's really interesting. DS is left hand dominant but does some things with his right. (I'm similar!) like he'll write with his left, but on the iPad would draw and write with his right!

[ChristmasSeacow]

Yes, I can just see that thanks.

I have had an epiphany too - I think DS is delayed in developing a dominant hand because he can't really 'cross the midline'. So I probably need some physio advice. We have an OT assessment tomorrow (brought forward because of EHCP assessment) so that might get things going.

Thanks so much again for the advice.

[Moonandstarsandback]

If you zoom into the picture you can see someone holding it... PenAgain Twist N' Write Pencil, 2/Pack, Sold as One Pack https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B004E2S1XI/ref=cmswwrcppapi_ubTTyb1EWXNRZ

[ChristmasSeacow]

Oooooohhhhh!

Yes it is hard for them. Everything seems hard for my little DS at the moment - he's just becoming aware of his differences too

Thanks for the suggestion, i will order a pencil as it's worth a try!

[Moonandstarsandback]

Christmas, I couldn't work it out until it came in the post! I've learnt it does need refill lead though! You kind of put your finger through the gap into the dent and thumb wraps naturally around it! My son calls it his sling shot pencil! The putty is good. My son (also ASD) has sat through school plays with that putty!
My son gets very frustrated about his writing. I don't think it's comfortable for him to write and he can't write fast enough for his ideas I don't think. Plus he wants it to be perfect. So hard for them.

[ChristmasSeacow]

Thanks Moon - though I can't quite understand how that pencil works (not a sentence I ever thought I'd write!) . Not too expensive though so probably worth a punt.

I will defo get that putty too. I've toyed with the idea before but just not taken the plunge.

DS has ASD and hypermobility, not EDS. apparently the hypermobility can be a challenge for writing.

I also think he is hyperlexic, hence the obsession with letters. He can read and spell far in excess of his age, which is why he is so frustrated about the writing! However, I need to make sure he spends time on his social skills too. That's not easy!

Thanks for the suggestions everyone, I appreciate you taking the time.

[Moonandstarsandback]

My son is older than yours, he's 6.5 and still holds a pen in his fist. He canf form all his letters well with this grip and is even joining up his writing now. However mostly won't write! School and I have tried many types of pencils, grips, pens etc..... but school have just given him the twist and write pencil which he's been enjoying writing with....just bought one for home too now!
twist n write Twist N Write Ergonomic Single Pencil By Penagain https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B001LDFAXC/ref=cmswwrcppapi_K4uSyb6AADY1T

[Moonandstarsandback]

This is good putty... Mobility Choices Coloured Resistant Therapy Putty - Set of 4 x 57g (2oz) Tubs https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01DM478YQ/ref=cmswwrcppapi_y3uSybB1S0CQ6

[drspouse]

My DS has hypermobility but not EDS - there is a range within hypermobility too.

[GreyStars]

I have EDS, and I still do swap hands all the time as it becomes uncomfortable. When you say mobility issues I'm guessing it might be EDS? So that might be why he is swapping, nothing would come between me and my pens when I was small - so I'd swap hands

I do always write with my right hand now, my left looks like doctor writing but everything else I swap between hands I don't even notice I'm doing it.

When I was little, i was told off for not holding a pen in a traditional way, and forced to do so (very early 80's) it is so uncomfortable for me to hold a pen in that way for and if I continue very painful causing shooting pains up my arm. So I use more of a grip, finger out very painful. Finger tucked under neat writting and less pain. I also can't hold knives and forks "properly" opposite hands to most and hold a knife differently as the similar motion to holding a pen will cause pain.

Larger grip pens are easier for me too, less stress on my ligaments in my hands.

[ChristmasSeacow]

I will get some putty - been thinking about it got a while but haven't been confident I can get DS to play with it!

Reporting back on crayon rocks - he is sat writing out numbers with them now. The end result is much clearer than with a pen so j think they are a success!

Interestingly though, he still swaps them between his left and right hands as he writes.

[Knickersinatwist36]

OT

[Knickersinatwist36]

We got these:

<a class="break-all" href="//www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B01DM478YQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1487850033&sr=8-1&keywords=mobility%20choice&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">//www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B01DM478YQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1487850033&sr=8-1&keywords=mobility%20choice&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21

And OT gave us a sheet of exercises (although DD2 does tend just to do lots of moulding and squeezing which PT said was fine too).

[drspouse]

Any suggestions on types/sources of putty? I can see DS loving that.

[notgivingin789]

Please order putty too ! It is way better than playdoh but it comes in different textures (hard, soft, very hard..etc).

[ChristmasSeacow]

I just ordered some Crayon Rocks - they look like they will be really good if I can get DS to engage with them!

Thanks for the scissor info Frazzled. I think I will wait to see what the OT suggests before trying lots of things but will keep the info up my sleeve just in case we need to loom at options for ourselves!

[ChristmasSeacow]

We have been referred to OT but have been waiting about 8 months so far.

Very good idea about the short piece of chalk or crayon, thanks.

[frazzledbutcalm]

OP ... I think ds scissors are long Loop spring loaded scissors. He tried various ones with OT ... it's not something I would just buy as what suits one doesn't suit another. Have you been referred to OT?

[drspouse]

I agree re crayon rocks - you can't hold them any other way.

[Sausagepickle123]

We were recommended to do lots of "pre writing" activities (e.g. Drawing shapes in foam etc) and work to strengthen upper body (e.g. Climbing bear walls). Those stabilo pencils are great.
One top tip was to give child the end of a piece of chalk to draw/write/scribble with as they have to hold that with a tripod grip.
Good luck!

[ChristmasSeacow]

Thanks fir the further suggestions. I bought some threading beads for that reason but he won't thread them, just lines them up! I have been doing a few other fine motor activities with him did a while though, and I think they are helping gradually.

I bought a stabilo pencil, will give it a try in the next couple of days. I hadn't heard of those crayons not, I will look into those thanks!

[dontknowwhat2callmyself]

CD = DD

[dontknowwhat2callmyself]

CD uses the Stabilo Easy pen and pencil as mentioned upthread. Occupational Therapist recommended it. I think it has made a difference for DD.

[notgivingin789]

Maybe do a lot more fine motor activities that encourage the use of using a pincer grip ? e.g. Writing on shaving foam, threading beads, ROCK crayons ( very small and has some sort of a grip so that you HAVE to use your pincer fingers to draw with it) Putty activities (twisting the putty--again encourage the pincer grip) pegs, putting coins in a diagonal slit (BOX).