Hello,
I am pretty new here, I was recommended this site by someone I know. I am not good with typing things up and also expressing myself. I have a son age 7 who has ASD he has no confidence what so ever it is really hard to get him out if the house so he misses school a lot, he prefers things just to be me and him.
He has recently been saying "I just want to die I don't like it here anymore" and to add he also suffers from sickle cell anemia, and I myself also suffer from depression and anxiety it has got to a stage where I feel as I am failing him, I just don't know what to do. I have kept in asking myself throughout the day why has this happened to my child.
On the odd chance when I do manage to persuade him to come out of a walk to the local park he just watches all the other children play, he doesn't have any friends his reason for not interacting with his peers is "I'm not good enough to be their friends"
I don't know how anyone on here can help me, maybe I just needed to write this and post it, as I don't have any friends in real life and I'm also not getting any support, my son does attend a specialist school but he dislikes going, and I always get the phone call telling me to go and get him, which is very unprofessional.
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.
SN children
Mother of ASD child.
LoveYouDarling · 06/07/2014 23:35
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PolterGoose 
Kleinz If I got one for myself and played it near him, he wouldn't take any notice, he has never asked me for something after seeing someone else with it, he doesn't ask for things. He has said he doesn't want one so I am not going to get one for him, he is not good with a pen or pencil and he isn't good at holding heavier items without dropping them, give him a glass or cup for instance and he will drop it so, so I hold the glass or cup for him when he wants a drink.
The reason I think he has got OCD because he is forever washing his hands, she puts in gloves and gets a cloth and cleans up, also he won't use the bathroom without wearing gloves, I can't seem to get him out of this habit.
Thanks for all the suggestions!
Our kids are all unusual but in different ways. So for me, part of chatting her is just sharing some of the unusual-ness with other people who “get it” even though their kids are different from mine. I hope that’s OK for you loveyoudarling
I’ve done some funny things to get my DS to try things which he’s enjoyed later on. Like, my DS loved watching videos and he’d watch them over and over again but then he’d get bored, only he never wanted to try a new one. So I’d tell him “I got this video from the charity shop and I need to test if it works” and I’d put it on and sit in front of it. Gradually he’d creep in to peek and then he’d be hooked 
I wonder - he wants you to get something for yourself (what a sweetie ), so if you got a console with a lego game “for yourself” and played with it while he was there, and then left it lying about, would he have a go? Or would all that be too scary for him? (Just a thought, I wont be offended the answer's “not a chance”)
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It’s so sad for you and for him, but I’m sure you’re right, your DS wouldn’t cope with a holiday abroad yet. 
Given how much he has to deal with compared to other kids, ASC anxiety and physical illness too, even the little moments of calm and happiness and enjoyment you can both have in your days will make the biggest difference to him. And you are making sure he gets some of them.
Speaking personally (and I know our kids are very different) my DS also got a lot out of having a games console. And he gets very stressed by choosing things, so either he knew exactly what he wanted already (usually because someone else had it at school) or else I always had to choose things for him. He wouldn’t go into a toy shop or look at toys online at all. Then he got into Pokemon cards and somehow he would go in to look for the Pokemon cards he wanted, he could find the cards and we’d pay and get right out. Now he will look around at games in a computer-games shop, and he can spend ages researching online to decide what gadgets he wants. Over the years (he's 16 now!) one thing kind of led to another Kids vary so much though.
I would say don't simply just show him a games consul...they will mean nothing to him unless he experiences it for himself.Is there any friend of yours who has one and maybe he could have a go on it or suchlike?
I honestly don't think browsing the minefield of consuls/games etc will do anything for him.
I do however think they can be an invaluable tool for kids with Asd.I know my lad would be bereft without his.It gives him an interest and a focus and is great for helping him let off steam/unwind.
I also feel you have been failed dreadfully by your school and GP.You absolutely need some support and soon.Go back to your GP or see a different one if needbe. You need referrals for support services asap .
It will get better so please stay positive and stay posting here.It is a great help.
Good luck OP .
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LYD - I am so very sad reading this thread, for you and your ds - as you are both dealing with a double-whammy - ASD and sickle-cell.
Ok, now all I can add is some suggestions based on what I have read so far:
Firstly, ASD contains the word Spectrum which I translate to differences within a similarity, so my suggestions are based on what I recognize as being similar to my own ds.
Yes, it seems that 7 is about the most difficult time - and it also seems that this is the age when you need to actively engage and seek outside help:
ASD - you need to get a referral to your GP to CAMHS, and take it from there - I have found them to be very supportive and helpful, although I recognize others haven't so much.
School - contact your local Parent Partnership first, they are funded by your Local Authority but give independent advice and can be helpful. Your ds and his situation with school absolutely needs to and can be addressed. This is no easy task and can be often the most difficult thing for parents to sort through but you need to do this.
As soon as you can - based on what you have learned through the Summer - make an appointment with the Senco at the school.
Interests - Lego and doing things on his own - this strikes a chord with me, as many upthread have said, computer games have been a saviour and this is true with my ds (now 12). You have said that these are no good for your ds but you could try getting a handheld console like a Nintendo DS or PSP and leave it charged and loaded with a Lego game placed somewhere casually (perhaps his bedroom?) and just leave it there. Left on his own he may pick it up and give it a go.
Window Staring - he might be deeply concentrating on something he sees interesting out there. My son liked the birds in the trees.
DLA - even if you don't need the money it is useful because if you get the middle-rate (which many with ASD do) you gain access to charitable/independent/local services that you wouldn't otherwise. It is a very difficult form and everyone needs help filling it in for the first time so search online for your nearest source of assistance with this - possibly your local National Autistic Society or Citizens Advice - it's different from place to place.
It is very isolating and difficult, you have done so well to get as far as you have done without support and are a fantastic mother, but you are going to need some support. It does get better although there will always be bad days. You are not alone. We are here (although I'm posting and going).
Sorry OP,I didn't mean to upset you !Yes ,I did read the whole thread. Hope you find a solution .
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I honestly think you should consider getting a games consul such as x-box.Others may disagree but this is what my ds ,14 ASD,lives for and yes we have to restrict it etc but he connects now with others online and I couldn't imagine what he would be like without this outlet.When he gets in from school its like a pressure valve being released as he shouts playing an action game and lets off steam that way.
It is truly the one interest most boys with ASD seem to enjoy the most from what I read on here and other sites also.
Its weird because these games whether action/adventure/sci fi/minecraft or whatever can often be loud/noisy/flashing images etc-all the things which our kids with ASD cannot cope with but for some reason the medium of computer games just seems to make them all tick.
That is my opinion anyway.
As regards assessments for OCD the GP is your first stop for a referral and please change GP....a different GP will possibly make all the difference.
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