ME!...Apparently when my Ds (AS) is having days when he is not completing his work their BEST EVER strategy (which was working fantastically until I was able to lower my Ds's anxiety levels when he came in from school by getting him to open up about his day/work, so I can possibly, maybe actually try to HELP) to stop him from bouncing off the dam walls and constantly asking me every second if I love him and if I am proud of him, or randomly telling me that my life would be better for me if he wasn't in it supposedly caused this super amazing strategy to 'stop working' 
I know this is not the AIBU thread but Please, please can one of you level headed ladies tell me that IANBU to be extremely pissed about this?. The more I think about it the more it is really riling me up!
Also, If there are any special needs teachers on here can I have your views on an experience SN teacher (previously worked in a SS) who has had experience with Asperger's telling my Ds (or any Dc for that matter) that he isn't completing his work because he is being 'lazy'?....what if I was to add into the equation that this was done in the classroom with all other children present? (but it was OK because it was a 1-1 discussion ) Is it just me, having completely lost my patience with peoples sheer stupidity being a little over protective or is this really unacceptable? Weeks ago my Ds heard me jovially telling his dad that he was lazy, some time after he declared that I didn't like his dad on the basis that I had told he was lazy! 
PS. A little note to those too busy on MN and not doing the jobs they are paid for.......you know who you are! I have officially lost my patience, congratulations you have stirred a part of me that I have always managed to keep at bay! You thought I was a PITA before....its about to get a whole lot worse. How dare you!? when you actively avoid using strategies provided by outside agencies to blame ME for your inability to act on this guidance!
Well I feel a bit better now! Sorry about the rant! 
TIA
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.
SN children
Soooo the best strategy for my Ds is to use.........
crazeelaydee · 09/05/2013 11:33
I know lougle everything just seems to be transpiring from one thing to another. Just for the record I do not expect my DS to be immune from -degrading- comments from CT's and I would be over the moon to never have to see another professional or hear the words Asperger's syndrome ever again, I don't have an issue with my DS being called "lazy" I have an issue with the schools pig ignorance to acknowledge that something is amiss.....3 years, 3 different teachers, blaming me yet NO progress in his written work to me screams something is not right, his anxiety towards writing (not an oh hey feck it I just can't be arsed attitude, which I would expect from a "lazy" child), the fact that he will sit down (with encouragement) with all intentions of doing his written work but within 5 minutes ends up in such a state.........sorry I just don't buy "lazy" 
.
Hello...me again!!! My Ds came out from school in a vile mood again yesterday, luckily it was me who had the brunt of his verbal frustration (my Dd was tired so very quiet, didn't say a word to provoke a reaction from her brother, sometimes I feel so sad for her 
) and later he was so clingy I felt like I was suffocating!.
He got into big trouble for not doing his English work (surprise), his teacher shouted at him and he cried (surprise), his end of year report was mentioned (guess that was mentioned during CT rant?). LATER he randomly told me that "when the teacher helpers are not in class, all of the other Dc don't get any help therefore he will not get any help" (could just visualize his CT in front of me saying the words!!). IF this was said I see her point 1 CT:25 Dc but if there is 1 Dc clearly struggling surely the CT should help?? or am I just thinking like a completely selfish knoob again??
So the the reason for his work to be up and down is due to varying support. What can I do about that then? I really don't know what to do, they obviously aren't using the buddy system which they said they would...maybe they did but it didn't work?? I don't bloody know....going arrrooouunnddd.....and arrrroooouunnnnddd...
Hi Attila, I have been getting bits of info together for a statement, I have been on ipsea website (but thanks for putting the link on ). But it appears that they are saying/proving they are doing things but they clearly aren't. What if the same happens with a statement?. On the section as to why the school can't support his needs do I through gritted teeth write down what their not doing and still no progress?
If his work shows that he does his work one day but not the next and they write in that he has had 1-1 support on all days (but didn't) that would look like he just doesn't want to complete his work.
lougle glad you said that.... I wasn't brave enough 
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My DS can be incredibly lazy. I could probably count on one hand the number of pieces of work he has ever actually completed in class. If he can get someone else to do the work for him, he will. He only does work when it actually counts ie exams, otherwise he doesn't see the point.
He is exactly the same at home - constantly asking me/DH to bring him things that he is more than capable of getting for himself...... he is 16
However, if anyone had ever told DS, in school, in front of anyone else that he was lazy, he would probably have gone into complete meltdown. One of the things he wrote on his Passport on Transition from Primary to Secondary school was "I don't like being told off in front of other people"
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