Potty training!!!!!!

[blacksocks33]

PLEASE can I get some help from you guys!

DS is almost 4. Starting mainstream school in sept. I'm posting in here because he does have some additional needs and will be receiving SEN help at school. He has a considerable speach and communication delay. His talking is getting there, but the delay has impacted other areas of his development. He is the loveless little boy, such a sweet and lovely nature.... but if he doesn't want to do something, he won't!!!
Been attempting potty training for a while. Had some help from the child's development Center who have advised to gradually inteoduce the toilet. The toilet was an absolute no so we reverted to the potty. He started sitting in it clothed, then I was advised to get him to sit in it without a nappy. Then I was advised to put the underpants over his nappy... and that's as far as I've got.
He absolutely hates the potty and he is so distressed when not having his nappy on. We've been at this stage a good few months now.
He will do a wee on the potty... but not every time and he cries because he's "scared" every time.

The thing is... he is stubborn. And with other struggles like, putting his coat on, brushing his teeth etc I have just had to do it and him get over it. Pandering doesn't help him in these situations. So I am wondering if I just stop the plaster off with the potty? But I know he's going to be so upset.

I just don't know what to do. Does anyone have any advice?

[Headfirstintothewild]

If DS is so distressed he doesn’t sound ready.

If you do want to persist some find cutting a hole in the nappy helps.