Weird sleep guilt - good sleeper

[Weirdguilt]

This is a weird one and you might want to skip it if you have a bad sleeper.....

I'm sure it's motivated by social media - I have a newborn (DC2) so am bombarded by parenting accounts and posts. So many of them are talking about how constant night wakings are developmentally appropriate and how co-sleeping is the natural norm. So many comments slating sleep training with the dominant narrative being 'they are waking, they just know not to bother crying for you'.

Both my children slept through before 4 months. I have never, ever left them to cry (I've left them to sing and babble a bit) and I'm pretty strict on daytime nap routine/wake windows. So whilst they've been in a routine, they've never needed 'sleep training'. They were big so loads of night feedings not necessary quite early.

I've developed this fear that because they preferred to sleep independently from me - in the cot - they're either badly attached to me (I must be intrinsically cold so they don't bother shouting for me!) or developmentally abnormal. Both are happy and healthy and actually quite clingy in the day (want me, nobody else). Anyone else have this weird fear?

[Weirdguilt]

Should say newborn is not actually a newborn - 6 months now.

[PlantDoctor]

Don't feel guilty about silly things! You're just lucky! X

[usernother]

People who have no trouble re their children sleeping don't post about it on social media, there is no need. You've nothing to worry about.

[Weirdguilt]

Thank you. I guess thats true - nobody talks about naturally good sleepers (I know it's luck). Narrative seems to be sleep deprived hell or co-sleeping for years with little in between.

[FrenchFairytale]

My 6 year old has always slept. I feel relieved as I cannot cope with lack of sleep.

[Weirdguilt]

I cannot cope either, maybe they just know that?! (Rather than me just being a cold, unfeeling monster?!)

[catsnore]

I've had a non sleeper and then a sleeper. It does seem to be just luck. If your kids are happy and settled, don't beat yourself up - just enjoy your sleep!!!!!

[Busby88]

It’s luck OP. I can’t cope with no sleep and I’ve had two non sleepers.

[LostittoBostik]

You had easy(ish) newborns. Thats brilliant! You might have hormonal tweens or shouty, unreliable teens. Or you might not. It's all a stage. Just be happy that stage was straightforward.

[LostittoBostik]

@Weirdguilt

I cannot cope either, maybe they just know that?! (Rather than me just being a cold, unfeeling monster?!)

Maybe they also genetically need a lot of sleep so sleep easily? My eldest is a complete night owl. She's 6 and rarely asleep before 10, awake every day before 6am. Tons of energy. At every point she's needed far less than the 'recommended' amount of time. This stuff is all genetic I think, so maybe yours sleep well because you sleep well? 🤷‍♀️

[Weirdguilt]

Absolutely I think that's true. My reception child still needs to go to bed at 7, much earlier than some of her peers.

[Daichead]

Just enjoy it!

DC1 was a terrible sleeper. He didn’t sleep a full night until he was 2.5 years old.

DD slept 12 hours a night from 3 weeks old. I used to prod her to see if she was OK as I couldn’t understand it. She never had any kind of ‘sleep regression’ either. She slept soundly consistently (she is now 16 years old!) .

I didn’t do anything differently with then. I just got lucky once. You got lucky twice 😊