Nearly 2 year old never slept through night!!

[Bee182814]

I thought I would post out of desperation really as I've tried everything else....
My DS will be 2 in June and has never slept through in his life - in fact he wakes every 30-40 minutes throughout the night. My slerp app tell me thst i get an average of 1 hour 27 mins dlerp a night! I'm due DC 2 in august and have suffered badly with sickness and tiredness this pregnancy to the point where the lack of sleep is now making me very depressed. I've tried everything, I've got every sleep book under the sun, paid these online 'sleep experts' for sleep plans, tried leaving him to cry it out (he will literally go for hours!) Begged GP and HV to help and they won't do anything. He has a solid routine and is well fed, stimulated etc. Anyone have any advice? I'm desperate, this is ruining my life!

[pumpkinpie27]

Hi, I’m so sorry believe me I feel your pain. I have a 22 month old boy who has never slept and screams most nights. Anything from going in 3-15 times a night. We have even had him the hospital who basically said he’s fine just doesn’t sleep. It’s not nightmares but may be bad dreams. He doesn’t feed through the night either. Sometimes I just put his dummy in but other times like last night I had to put him in our bed (which I’ve never done for safety so now he hates it anyway). I have tried EVERYTHING. Lavender sprays, lights, music, change of mattress I have tried everything. I can’t sleep train as he’s a small human now he would be hysterical. I just don’t like it. I dream every night that he will sleep through but it doesn’t come. And then I have to listen to nursery mums saying how amazing their toddler sleeps. It’s made me depressed I haven’t been able to work properly. Anyway, I’m sorry for the huge message and I know I haven’t helped but I do have a point. YOUR NOT ALONE. Please don’t think there is something wrong with them. It WILL get better. I have a 7 year old now and he was the same which is why we waited so long. Honestly your not alone if you need to message me feel free as I feel alone with this misery too. He slept from around 19 months btw so I’m still waiting. Oh one thing that does make it worse is sugar! He has zero sugar probably from 2pm (unless he is with his nan) Xx

[Mumofgirls1992]

Hi have you got an update on your situation ? My 18month old hasn't slept through since she was born . She wakes up 5 to 8 times through the night , about 6 times in the evening too . I just don't know what to do anymore x

[Mrsweasleysclock]

Hi. My DS also woke up often at night until around 5. I found keeping a water bottle near his bed for him to drink helped. Often I would go in, let him have a sip of water and he would go back to sleep again. Maybe dry throat?

He still wakes up from time to time now, only difference is that he will have his water on his own rather than calling for me.

He'll get there but I don't think it's anything particularly abnormal or to be worried about. X

[ChittyBang1987]

@pumpkinpie27 I would suggest starting your own thread as others may not reply as it is a zombie thread.

[pumpkinpie27]

Hi, sorry this is late now but did you solve your sleep issues? I have an 18 month old and I’m out of my mind my husband and I are so depressed. He cries sometimes screams…tho not nightmares, about 15 times a night. I’m so miserable and it’s affecting my relationship with him. It also doesn’t help that he screams non stop too x

[Cborssato]

Going through the exact same thing here. Were you able to find any help, find any solution? If so, please let me know. Desperate here too.

[LimaB]

I wish I had the answer. I’m still struggling :/

[Mamaof]

Hi.. when did your DS finally sleep through and what did you do to solve the problem. .. Am in the same situation in 2021😢😢

[LimaB]

Hello. I know this thread is a few years old now but just wondering if the sleeping got any better? My daughter just turned 2 and not a single night she has slept through since she was born. I’ve spoken to doctors and have been pestering the HV but they’ve not been any help.. I have tried every thing you can possibly think of yet she still wakes up every half hour to an hour every single night... she has no naps during the day, she doesn’t have a comforter and she’s pretty well fed... I’m just struggling to figure out how to keep her asleep. I get 0 time to myself during the day and 0 time at night because I’m up all night trying to put her back to sleep the past 2 years :/

[BigPigLittlePig]

My dd is now 3 and has only just started reliably sleeping through. When times were really bad I resorted to sleeping on her floor on a mattress - it's interesting that now her speech is really good, she talks about the "shadows" in her room and other scary things. Anyway, I always thought that trying to make her happy to be in her own room was helpful. I think also if you are feeling brave enough, losing the dummy might be an idea, especially if that is what's causing him to wake so often.

[Bee182814]

Yes also something I've considered but I'm such a chicken I've been to scared! Okay I've got a list of possible things to try - all very helpful ladies I'm so grateful! Happy mothers day all xxx

[crispiecrunchie]

That should be love my sleep!!

[crispiecrunchie]

We have the same issue with the dummy with dd. Doesn't seem to occur to her to look for it. She just shouts 'I want my dummy'. It was ok with just her and we could pop in once or twice a night but with the pair of them tag team waking its not so easy. This last week we have dropped the dummy during the day and she has done really well without it. I agree a few weeks make a a huge difference in their understanding.

Apparently I didn't sleep through till three. I licensed my sleep now though! I have that song 'I'll sleep when I'm dead' running in my head a lot!! Xxxx

[waitingforsomething]

Also have you considered cold turkey on the dummy if it's causing waking? A tough couple of nights but could be worth it. Agree you may have another few months before a gro-clock will be worth it

[Bee182814]

I've thought about having the cot in our room for a bit to see if it makes him more comfortable - was just wondering if it would confuse/upset him when baby comes in a few months but definitely something to consider - thank you! Xxx

[hazbaz]

My Ds1 didn't sleep through once until he was 21 months and went through periods of waking every 30-40 mins so you totally have my sympathies . What worked for us was probably pretty unique circumstances, we moved from a 1 bed flat to an old 2 bed cottage & I found out I was pregnant with DS2. We just explained to him that as he was a big boy he needed to stay asleep his bed all night & went for it one night leaving him in his cot with a grobag (so couldn't get cold) but DH going up & telling him he could sleep by himself & he did after about 15 mins of crying.

I totally agree that some children just take longer to be ready to sleep by themselves, he is 7 now & still creeps into our bed occasionally as he says he misses us / doesn't like to be alone!

Equally we tried to leave DS2 to cry when he was about 18 months and wouldn't sleep unless in bed with us, he cried for over 35 mins when I cracked...in the end what worked was when we put him in DS1's bedroom in the cot & he started to sleep through. He was probably just 2 by then.

Is there anyway to have a cot or even a blow up mattress in your bedroom for a bit so he's with you but not disturbing you so much? Then try again in a few weeks? Even a few weeks can make such a difference to their understanding / emotional maturity at that age.

Anyway probably not helpful but just wanted to let you know you are not alone and we've got through it twice and you will too!

[Bee182814]

Hiya - thanks for replying, absolutely overwhelmed by all the support so very grateful! He has a nap for about an hour at 10 ish - will definitely consider dropping it now.

Generally he just wants dummy back but a few times a night just stands up in the cot and poi ts at the door (he wants me to take him in to my bed but then plays up when I get him there!)

Turning cot bed in to bed is a good suggestion, I've considered it (along with gro clock) but I don't think he will 'get' the gro clock yet, it's amazing what a few weeks can do in terms of their understanding though so one to keep in mind for sure.

I'm also going to bed as soon as I get him to bed, doesn't bother me a great deal as Ibe always liked an early night :)

Totally agree it's genetic - OH and his siblings didn't sleep through till they were at school and my brother and sis the same!

Tried online sleep consultation thing - though it was a bit rubbish to be fair but open minded if any recommendations.

Thank you all so much - it's really appreciated and nice to hear it gets better/I'm not the only one! Xxx

[crispiecrunchie]

Also agree with Wacca when we dropped the nap it helped. Fingers crossed you get better sleeper xxx

[crispiecrunchie]

Another suggestion is some people have success with the groclock. Might be slightly young? We go for path of least resistance a lot. Is there a time he does sleep ok? I've taken to going to bed at 8 as normally get to half ten. I'm finding reading here and posting helps ar least makes it feel less lonely when surrounded by kids that slept through at 6 weeks!!!

[waitingforsomething]

Poor you op that is an unsustainable amount of sleep.
When he wakes every 30-40 minutes do you leave him or do you have to do something? If so what do you do?

You say he's well fed which I'm sure he is- have you tried a 4th meal- like weetabix or porridge and a banana before bed to give him a bit extra?

Also cut his nap or reduce it a lot- they're all different and he might not need it. Dd1 although a reasonably good night sleeper didn't need a day sleep at all past two. And As a child I didn't nap past 6 months!

My last suggestion is a bed instead of a cot - he might be more comfortable and you can get a decent bed guard. Dmil always says that dh hated his cot and slept better in a bed from about 1

[VeryPunny]

DD is nearly 3 and has never slept through. At least now she can sometimes wake quietly and come into bed with one of us so disruption is minimal. CO sleeping is the only thing that worked for us.

Her younger brother is usually out like a light at 7pm and we don't hear a peep out of him until about 6am (he's 16m). Go figure....

[SusanAndBinkyRideForth]

My 4 year old didn't sleep through until she was 3.
By which time I has the next non sleeper. She's now 2.5 and has slept through once (although usually only wakes once at about 5 so I'm coping) and I'm expecting #3.

I didn't sleep through until age 4. My brother was 5. My cousins were 4. I think it sometimes runs in families and all you can do is wait it out.

Not helpful, sorry :(

[JerryFerry]

It is definitely not just you.

Have you thought about getting a sleep consultant? I know it sounds ridiculous but I don't think you can put a price on wellbeing.

I used a sleep consultant with my son at 5 months and she had him whipped into a daytime routine as quick as you like. Never did crack the nights and it turns out he has a disorder but understanding that is helpful.

[WaccaWacca]

Is he still napping during the day? Both of mine started sleeping miles better when we dropped the nap. I know the advice is usually 'sleep begets sleep' but wasn't the case for us.