I know it's early, but we need your back to school/settling into new school tips....

[carriemumsnet]

I know noone wants to think about going back yet (or maybe after a week of rainy day play you're positively looking forward to it) but we'd like to put together a collection of Mumsnetters' top tips on settling your child into nursery, primary and secondary school, as well as any general tips on making the transition from the long summer hol to school time easier. So if you've had any experience of this and have any suggestions or tips please post them here.

Thanks in advance

MNHQ

[roisin]

If you are not buying a new school coat this year, then check the pockets and give it a good wash.

I just checked ds2's coat pockets and discovered some rotting crab claws he'd picked up on holiday several weeks ago ... eewwwww....

[Clary]

Oooh roisin that's such an ace tip about dealing with letters home at once. Otherwise they just get lost and you are walking to school one Friday morning and every other child is dressed as a dinosaur - and DS1 says, mummy, didn't you see the letter I brought home?

(this scenario is actually my abiding school-related nightmare.)

On a more sensible note:
Make sure they can do up and undo coat and change shoes and clothes for PE

Also make sure they understand they are going to school to learn; apparently lots of children think it's just about play (well it is at first) but they do need to understand the overall purpose.

Keep it all low-key for first week or so - they may well be shattered.

Do not expect to hear anything about their day apart from maybe "I played with XX". Possibly not even that! The most amazing huggets of information will be revealed at random moments so stay alert.

[fussymummy]

I always get my children to help sort out their uniform with me.
What fits, needs replacing etc....

Then we make lists of what we need for each child!

Once all the uniform has been bought, they can then pick new pencil cases and contents and new lunch boxes.

That way, they don't moan too much and i usually get it bought fairly quickly.

[mintchips]

Make sure they can open their lunchbox and everything inside it.

[FluffyMummy123]

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[FluffyMummy123]

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[pointydog]

more seriously, act nonchalant

[pointydog]

tell them there's no option

[samanthar]

this is good advice cod as i will be very tempted to ascertain just precisely what has gone on. i have said that for the first week the three of us we will sit down and have a special treat and cup of tea/juice as soon as they come in ...will have to restrina myself and just see if the are at all forthcoming..unlikely but hey ho

[FluffyMummy123]

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[samanthar]

new to all this twins going into reception. but theya re wearing their new shoes whenever we go out, may regret buying early as they cost half a fortune and probably will only last til october or sthig.
i have been collecting things for them, name stickers , personalised pencils, a rather soppy story book about a mouse starting school and intend to wrap them up and have a little party with me and dp and them the night before
we have also played schools a few times they have written various teddy names etc on a register and we have done a registration and reading to the teddies and then done play dough
i am also reminding them how to spell their name /when their b-day is/ trying to ensure they know basic shapes etc. we have as suggested at the induction evening done a few odd one out/dot to dot activities/ 'writing'and drawing shopping lists and
we have talked about saying good morning miss/mrs and all the relevant names, only answering if you put yr hand up to answer, remeberibng to go to the toilet at break and lunch
doubtless all in vain as im sure they will be just as noisy as at home
they have to go full time form day one and are not 4 and a half............

[OliviaMumsnet]

Any more for any more?

[Whizzz]

and make sure they are beautifully behaved for the TA

[Whizzz]

Secondary school : make sure they know what to do if they miss the bus home, always read their planners / school homework diary every night in case of any issues noted by teachers

Primary : choose bag, lunch box together, put name tags on everything, make sure child can undo buttons etc to get changed for PE if need be, make buttonholes bigger to help

[OliviaMumsnet]

Another one bumps the thread.

[Earlybird]

We've just moved to America for a few years. DD would have been in Y2, but here in the States she'll be in first grade. She'll be going to a private school (does that automatically make it poncey? ). We've worked with the school to do some things that appear to have helped dd (hopefully - we'll know in a few weeks when school starts).

Most of my tips revolve around familiarising dd with the new physical setting, and also doing what we can to ensure she sees a few familiar faces when she goes into the classroom.

The school provided us with the names/contact details of 4 children they thought might 'fit' well with dd, and we've had playdates with two of them (others away on holiday).

We've walked through the building several times, and have seen which classroom will be hers, we've seen the gym and lunchroom and library. We've identified the closest bathrooms to her classroom, and seen the area where her 'peg' will be.

Her teacher wrote all the children a letter, and is meeting with the children new to the school upfront. DD's meeting was a few days ago, and she was able to see the classroom, and where she'll be sitting. The teacher has kindly placed her next to a girl we've met and had playdates with over the summer. DD came out of the meeting very excited.

Interesting to me - all the children in dd's year have an 'orientation' meeting for an hour in advance of the start of school. The children will look around the physical classroom/lower school space while the parents are briefed about practical school matters - pick up and drop off locations, lunch routine, sports, curriculum, etc. The school has thoughtfully scheduled the meeting at lunchtime so that working parents might better be able to attend.

Long-winded (as always!) way of saying - introduce things gradually, and it should be a much easier transition.

[OliviaMumsnet]

Any more for any more?
Thanks
MNHQ

[roisin]

That's interesting PrettyCandles. My boys sometimes take a while to adjust to 'holiday-mode' after they breakup, but going back to school is always very straightforward and they just slip back into routine.

But if they do go back on a Monday they are very tired by the end fo the week.

[PrettyCandles]

Ds1 needs a gentle and clear transitiuon backinto school mode. He can't cope with holiday excitements, late bedtimes, leisurely breakfasts and unstructured days continuing until the last moment of the holidays, and then waking uyp the following day and going straight to school. So we make sure that the last couple of days of holiday are fairly quiet, boring days, with much of the routine of schooldays. We do preparing-for-school things, eg instead of sorting out laundry, uniforms, bookbags etc in the evening, I do it during the day so that he can see that we are getting ready to go back to school. We talk about it, and about how schooldays are different to holidyas, what he's looking ofrward to the most at school, what he'll miss from the holidays, etc. We also plan a playdate for the first week.

With dd, who starts Reception in September, we've played with all of her uniform and school kit, so she knows what her stuff looks like and how to put it on etc. I don't think she needs much settling - she's so eager to go!

[roisin]

Don't discuss options too much with your child - any age; but rather set rules and stick with them. And have set routines too. This gives children security.

e.g:
Make a decision about school dinners vs packed lunches and tell your child they have to stick with it for half a term. (I told mine til they were 14!)
Immediately when they get home:
What do they* do with their shoes, coat, uniform?

• Check bag (or get them to) for letters home. Deal with them immediately. Write checks/fill in forms and put straight back in bags.
  
• Where do they put their school bags, lunchboxes?
  
• When do they do their homework?
  
  I know there are fantastic previous threads on here for good morning routines.
  
  Make sure your child knows where they are meeting you after school (especially if it is a big one), and be certain you are reliably there. But give them instructions as to what they should do if you have not turned up.
  
  If your older child is struggling to settle, and especially to separate from you, try writing a short letter to them to keep in their coat pocket. But they're not allowed to read it until after you've gone.
  
  I don't think you should pre-empt the start of school. Ideally sort out school uniform/equipment, etc. early in the summer holidays, then have a specially fantastic fun last week of the hols.
  
  Then go back to school with a bang. Concentrate on making sure they get to bed early, plenty of sleep, and good breakfasts, and they'll soon get back into school routine.

[yeahinaminute]

Well DD is starting school in Sept [sob] and although we have no getting -to- know- you issues - she's been to pre - school with most of her pals - I have bought her uniform - placed carefully in a "special place" in her wardrobe - and the most fun was helping me apply her name tapes - it made it seem very, very real to her somehow !!

[OliviaMumsnet]

Bumping for those who're complaining they're bored.
Get your thinking caps on! {grin]

[WaynettaSlob]

I'm a total novice at this as DS1 is starting "big school" in September BUT, as he won't know anyone in the class I have got in touch with the school admin person and got contact details of some other parents, and have stated inviting the boys over on playdates so at least DS1 will see some familiar faces when he starts.

[OliviaMumsnet]

Anyone?

[OliviaMumsnet]

Any more tips please?