Meeting for trip abroad, how important is it that we go?

[BossyBanana]

DS (year7) is going on a trip abroad next month with school.
There is a meeting this week about the trip but it clashes with other plans.

When I receive the email about the meeting this morning I replied to say I won’t be able to make it but could they please forward any information,
the reply was that I should try to attend the meeting as all parents and students are expected to attend.

How essential is it that we attend this meeting?
I know I should try to attend but I’d rather not change my plans if they are just going to be telling me information we already know and going over the itinerary.
We already have a pretty detailed itinerary for the trip and they have given us a lot of information about it.

The meeting is supposed to be 45 minutes long.

Has anyone been to one of these?
How essential is it?

[ForeverbyJudyBlume]

Glad you didn't go, imho and ime you miss very little by not attending such meetings.

[BossyBanana]

I just wanted to update.

We didn’t go to the meeting but received an email ‘summary’ last night which was pretty much exactly what clary said.

Thank you all for your advice.

[BossyBanana]

I didn’t mean that I expect a teacher to give up time to give me a private meeting.

I’d prefer them to just email me any essential information, that’s what I have asked.

I only suggest I pop in for a 1-2-1 if they insist that there is essential information I need to be told in person, I would never request that as I’d rather not have to do it as it would be inconvenient for both of us.

[BoneyBackJefferson]

It will also contain the

"if you children breaks x,y and z rule you will be expected to make arrangements for them to return home"

[BubblesBuddy]

I think you are ok not to go. Apologise profusely! No need to say why you cannot go. In my experience attending isn’t a huge deal but it is a chance for parents to clarify arrangements.

From experience, parents ask about taking phones, phoning home, parents not phoning DC to tell them all the gossip at home. You get the drift. More questions will be about what happens if DC is sick, doesn’t like the food, allergies, stranger danger, sleeping arrangements, and what happens if DC wants to come home. What happens if transport home is delayed. How will you know about a revised pick up time?

Teachers will expect exemplary behaviour, parents to support their decisions and ensure they don’t keep contacting DC! They will also talk about behaviour and safety and DC doing what they are told. If you don’t have any worries at all, then it’s fine not to go. If you want to ask a question, most schools understand not all parents are available all the time. Email the lead teacher with any important query. If you don’t gave one, great.

[SavoyCabbage]

Tell your dd that she needs to get the information from her friends that are going. Get her to text a friend. Ask the friend to get dd a copy of any hand outs and to tell dd if there is anything that she needs to know.

[YemenRoadYemen]

I’m going to email them again and suggest I pop in for a 1-2-1 if it’s essential.

Don't do this.

[AuntieCJ]

I’m going to email them again and suggest I pop in for a 1-2-1 if it’s essential.

So you can't be arsed to go, even when told it's important, yet you expect a teacher to give up his/her time for a bit of a chat. I hope they tell you to piss off. I would. Either go (as you should) or accept things may go wrong because you weren't there.

[AtiaoftheJulii]

Last one one of us went to was 15 minutes and totally pointless.

If they've already got passports and ehic cards and paperwork signed, and have given you, what, maximum of 3 days notice? Then no, I wouldn't go.

[PCohle]

By all means don't go if you feel your other plans are more important but suggesting a teacher give up (yet more of) their free time to give you a 2-1-2 strikes me as fairly inconsiderate.

[BossyBanana]

Thanks for that info @clary

I would have liked to have gone but it’s short notice.

Hopefully they won’t mind just emailing me the information.

Passports, ehic’s and medical forms have all been sorted out and the school have them already.

[BossyBanana]

I don’t know any of the parents of other children going and we don’t live in the town where the school is so DS would need to get dropped off.

I’ve decided we aren’t going.
I do feel guilty about it but I really don’t think it’s going to be essential enough to cancel my plans.

I’m going to email them again and suggest I pop in for a 1-2-1 if it’s essential.

[clary]

So I used to run a year 7 trip and we used the meeting to get parents to hand in passports and ERIC'S, raised any issues over consent forms, pick up a medicines form. We also went through the itinerary and answered questions - eg how much money to take, will it be hot, what shoes to bring, do we need a towel (yes) and what sort of swimming trunk do boys have to wear in France (!).

If you think you don't need that kind of info don't go. It's poor if you've only had a days notice. What are your other plans?

[MarchingFrogs]

Do the plans with which this meeting would interfere involve your DS as well? If not, could he at least ask to go with one of his friends and their parents? Then one of you would know what the extra information was.

Presumably your DS's year group doesn't have a parents' Facebook page or WhatsApp group?

[BossyBanana]

Well yes because now I have the different opinions of several people who have experiences of this type of meeting.

I’ve never had a child go on this type of trip, as he is only in his first year at secondary school, so getting the opinions of people who have been involved in these kind of meetings does help me get a better idea of what the meeting will most likely be like.

[underneaththeash]

I always go to them - half are useful and half are a complete waste of time. Could your DS just go by himself (uber if necessary).

[YemenRoadYemen]

Surely, given there are 1000s of us, some will say, 'for heaven's sake - go', while others will say they're a waste of time.

Are you any the wiser?

[BossyBanana]

Well what I expected was a few of the thousands of MNers would probably have had DC’s who have been on similar school trips and been to similar meetings so would be able to tell me how essential these kind of meetings usually are so I could get a better understanding and weigh up my choice.

I’m sorry if it offered you.

[caughtinanet]

How can Internet random possibly know if the meeting is important?

If you can't go, you can't go but don't expect anyone to be able to tell you if you'll miss anything vital.

[GlennRheeismyfavourite]

At my school (I'm a teacher) I always things they're a pointless waste of time. Sometimes we use it as an opportunity to get lots of the form signing done but you can do that at another time. I wouldn't cancel your other plans.

[BossyBanana]

The school seem to treat everything as though it is of critical importance, so I’m not sure asking them how important the meeting is would help. (Which is why i decided to post here)

I don’t know many other parents at the school and the couple I do know don’t have children going on the trip, so don’t have anyone to ask about it either.

It’s difficult because I do feel like we should go but at the same time I strongly suspect i will be irritated afterwards as it’ll be nothing we didn’t already know and just an encouragement to tell the children they have to behave on the trip.

[Hoppinggreen]

I’ve been to 3 such meetings over the last few years and I found out nothing that wasn’t in the info we had been sent.
Might be different in your case though

[OneBILLIONDollars]

I don't know about how important the meeting is but it's a bit unfair to email you today about a meeting this week! What about parents who work evenings/nights?!

[stucknoue]

Part of the meeting will be reading the riot act to the students about behaviour etc hence both parent and child is at the meeting. At all of my kids schools and clubs the pre trip meeting was compulsory

[RedSkyLastNight]

I found the parents' meeting before DS went abroad with school useful. Yes, the paperwork will tell you the essential stuff but it won't go into detail about what actually happens day to day, what the journey will be like, expectations for behaviour, what kit you really need to bring, share experiences from previous years etc.
I think DS actually found the meeting especially useful as it helped him to visualise what the trip was actually like. So I'd say unless DC is essential to your plans, you at least let them go with another parent.