decision on 1st March? Anyone want to sit and sweat it out with me?

[MsIngaFewmarbles]

Urgh I am starting to feel queasy. I just want to know now. PFB (dd1) doesn't care which school she gets into and dh is being irritatingly pragmatic.

Is anyone else twitching nervously?

[MakeMineALargeRose]

This was me last year, wish I'd have know about mumsnet then as I was a right wreck waiting for the 1st March and could have done with lots if friendly virtual hand holding! Good look to everybody :-)

[mankyscotslass]

Entering the home stretch now.

[springlamb]

Envying the majority who can check online! We have to wait for snail mail as we have applied out of borough and that's the way it's done here. And with our post, DD may not hear until late on 4th.
It's stressing me more than her. On Friday morning I phoned our 'destination' borough just to make sure (again) that she was on their list. They are getting fed up with me, I'm sure I heard some muttering about 'neurotic nora' in the background.

[MaryBS]

I wondered if there were a countdown thread... eek and argh. Can I have an especially large eek as it appears the preferred school is looking to change its school uniform, to something more formal with ties, blazer etc, and my aspie son and ties do NOT mix!

[gazzalw]

Good luck everyone!

[MsIngaFewmarbles]

Are we nearly there yet? whiny

[VivaLeBeaver]

Hope its all good news for you.

I was here last year. DD passed her 11+ and unfortunately didn't get a place at the grammar (its the nearest 180 kids on distannce). I waited up till midnight and then got the bad news. I went to bed and sobbed and sobbed, didn't sleep for most of the night.

We lost our appeal and dd has ended up going to a comp in the next town. She's doing fine, loves the school. She seems to be doing well though probably not been pushed as hard as what she would have been at the grammar. But she's happy and enjoying it.

Just wanted to say if it isn't good news it isn't the end of the world. Her been at the comp is working a lot better than I thought it would.

[ChippyMinton]

Relax!
What will be will be on 1st March.
If it's what you/DC want, that will be fantastic.
If it is not, then it will be the springboard for a whole world of angst, phone calls, letter-writing. appeals prep etc etc. In which case enjoy these last few days of blissful ignorance.

[FiveHoursSleep]

Only 5 more sleeps...

[gazzalw]

Yes, would go along with what VivaleBeaver and ChippyMinton have said (waves!).

I think that a term and a half down the line from starting at secondary school, most of DS's cohort's parents are quite happy with the schools their children are now attending, even if they weren't necessarily their first choice ones.

I think if it's possible (once the initial shock has worn off), just be open-minded and flexible. Primary school admissions taught us that as soon as you 'let go' and accept another option it is much more likely that you might be surprised by an unexpected positive outcome elsewhere....

[saintlyjimjams]

Marking space as will be twiddling thumbs on Thursday waiting to log in at midnight (system usually work here - although knowing my luck....)

First choice is the boys grammar, second choice the local comp.

I actually quite like the local comp and think it would suit ds2 but everyone else wants the grammar. DS2 will be upset if he doesn't get it :sigh:

We know he passed the 11 plus, but don't know whether he got a place or is on the waiting list.

[gazzalw]

Saintlyjimjams, are you in London or elsewhere? Good luck....It sounds as if you are in a win win situation regardless of the result....

[saintlyjimjams]

Elsewhere.

The comp isn't particularly popular (prob because of the area its in) but it gets good results and I really liked the ethos. The local rag has just published an article about the head and I read it and thought how much I liked the school and their approach to learning. I think I will secretly be disappointed if he gets the grammar I don't get quite the same vibe from it.

Because it's a low birth rate year, with the exception of the grammars, you can pretty much pick which schools you want this year (in my area I mean). I think it will be a bit harder when ds3 comes to choose a secondary school as his cohort is larger.

[MaryBS]

DD is now in Y8, and I'm relieved to have got through that first year tbh, which brought all sorts of problems, even though we felt it was the right school. DS is a different kettle of fish though, and transition for him is going to be a lot harder, because of his Asperger's. He's very immature socially (which can be adorable to me, but not to his peers)

[ThreeBeeOneGee]

MaryBS: come and join us on our thread...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/1690589-Children-starting-secondary-in-September-2013-support-hand-holding-tips-and-advice

[mankyscotslass]

DS1 is feeling it a bit more than I thought - it all came out last night, about how he is nervous about leaving primary. I think he will be better when he knows which school he is going to - I think it's the uncertainty that is making him nervous.

[saintlyjimjams]

I think ds2 is the same manky. I have been trying to reassure him that we really don't mind which school he gets into, that both have pros and cons, that we really like both, but he is quite nervous. Big outburst about it a couple of weeks ago. I think he'll be better when he knows as well.

[mankyscotslass]

Friday can't come quick enough can it?

Poor DS, he was so upset last night, he had not been selected for one of his team sports and was talking about that, which lead into school talk and then it all came out jumbled together. He spent an hour snuggled up to me on the sofa once he had calmed down. They are so young really still.

[saintlyjimjams]

Yes it was similar here. An off the cuff remark and suddenly tears and it all came out. They are little for the pressure I think. God knows what it would be like if we were actually telling him we wanted him to go to a particular school.

I think we get the results at midnight but I'm not telling him that.

[muddyin2013]

We didn't tell DD the offer day on purpose. She is already worrying about SATS. We didn't want to pile the pressure on.

At school yesterday the teacher was asking all the children what schools they wanted to go to and then told them they would find out on Friday.

I found DD last night in the bath crying. She thinks it will be her fault if she doesn't get in. A girl in her class said she deserved a place more than DD.

So, I've sent DD into school today with coping ideas.

They are only little,ffs i never swear

I just hope she gets in.

[muddyin2013]

Just to say DS1/2 have/are at the school.
I'm actually seeing the head this week.

[EllenJaneisstillnotmyname]

Ooh, getting nervous now after reading the thread.

DS1 and DS2 are in a really good, inclusive comp/academy with a great ethos but no sibling rule for DS3. And we are out of catchment. They have a fair banding test for admissions so put them into 7 bands and take equally from each band based on catchment, then location. DS1 must have been in a lucky band, and DS2 has a statement of SEN. Really want DS3 to go there too, to keep him with his brothers as their dad left last year for an OW and they need some stability. grounds for an appeal?

DS3 has passed the 11+ for the boys grammar in the next town, but it's just a back up, third choice. Second choice is another comp that we are out of catchment for, where all his friends will go but he wants to be with his brothers.

Our LA cocked up 2 years ago and sent letters out a day too early, so we all heard unexpectedly on the 28th. It was great, really reduced the angst, so I've no idea when emails will come through or when the admissions system will be updated.

[Stroppy40]

We went through this 2 years ago and DD got 3rd 'choice' (a failing school in special measures at that point). I could've cried but we were positive on the outside and never let on that we were disappointed to her. We had managed her expectations from the point that we submitted the forms to the LEA and had prepared her for the likelihood that she'd end up there. As a result, she walked through the door on the first day with a positive attitude and is doing fantastically.

My message is; don't write anything off. Don't let your child know that you're disappointed or they'll start to believe that the school they're going to isn't good enough and you'll have lost them. If you're a parent who cares enough to push them and keep on their case (and the school's case), then they'll do well wherever they end up.

This Friday, I'm panicking in case her sister DOESN'T get in!!!!

Good luck everyone!

[MsIngaFewmarbles]

I have activities to keep myself busy as I have no lectures until friday and I don't want to drive everyone around me insane. I have you lot for that :)

[EllenJaneisstillnotmyname]

Stroppy, that's a really positive post. X fingers for your DD2.